today i decided to wear my new top to work. it is a very cute top that my friend gifted me a couple of weeks ago. it is a size Medium. it is an acceptable size, right? absolutely! if it didn't feel like it was cutting deep grooves into me, cutting off my circulation and making me look like a tiny walking sausage ready to burst.
for some time, i knew that i needed to stop gaining weight and start loosing it, but today really cemented it.
i am 29, 5'2", and about 170 lbs. i weigh more than my husband who is 5'9" and about 160 ish. yes, that is correct. *sigh*
i've always been a little pudgy, with 5 or 10 lbs to lose, but, for the most part, have always been in the 135-140 range. this might not be ideal according to some experts, but i looked great and, most importantly, always felt great during these times. however, contrary to Kate Moss' infamous quote, to me - that extra slice of decadent chocolate cake sometimes does taste as good as, if not better than, skinny feels.
case in point, over the last year and a half i have been eating a lot of chocolate cake (and burgers, pizza, chips - you know, the things that taste like heaven) and have gained like 40 lbs. i went from being a bit under 130 lbs to close to 170 lbs. oops.
i will be starting my weight loss journey in June because i have jam-packed days now, so starting now is not really giving myself a fighting chance.
i am disappointed i have to start all over again after loosing so much weight (i went from 170 to 130 . . . then from 130 to 170 again
). i made a huge effort all to throw it down my gut. ahhh. oh well, here goes again!
posting on here will make things easier, i hope!
here we go again!
