[A_the_Bear]

...and I'm not really a bear. I'm actually a 33 year old wife and mother of two who needs to ditch some fat. And I'm... nervous? Not terribly hopeful? Something like that.

See, there are only two times in my life I managed to lose weight on purpose. Once was a few pounds with Slim*Fast, the week before my wedding (9.5 years ago.) The second was last year... I lost 20 pounds on the Slow Carb Diet, but gained it all back.

My weight has always been just tied to my lifestyle, or emotional state, or something. I was depressed and miserable in high school, where my weight topped out at 255 pounds. Things changed as I went to college, found some friends and felt more in control of my own life, and I just naturally dropped to 175 or so. Stayed in the 170-177 range until after my oldest was born (8 years ago.) When he was 18 months old, I actually got down to 165! (He nursed like a tank, and I carried him around in an Ergo... and living in downtown Portland, it was just natural to walk all over the place.)

Right after my daughter was born, 5.5 years ago, we moved here to St. Louis. My husband's family is here, housing costs less, and he was having a hard time finding work in Portland. Well, I've gained weight every year we've been here, and I'm now up to 250. We can't just pick up and move back. I have to learn how to live here without eating and drinking so much.

So! I'm doing Medifast. I need someone else to figure out the food for me, and with everything being portioned in separate packages, I can't kid myself about how much I'm eating. My huge struggle is figuring out how to deal with uncomfortable emotions without turning to food and alcohol. (For starters, I've downloaded a gazillion games on my tablet, and stocked up on herbal tea.) It's also going to be a challenge to feed my family while I'm eating different things, but that's easier for my husband to help me with than the emotional stuff.

OK! Enough backstory! My box from Medifast is supposed to arrive today, so I start tomorrow!

[TrixieCatLAX]

Hi, A!

Portland is a great town. I met my husband there at a concert at the Crystal Ballroom almost seven years ago, so we have a very special place in our hearts for it. I really know what you're talking about with weight being connected closely to your emotions. I have gone through some serious weight gains related to major depression, huge amounts of stress... I topped out at 205, but I know that I could've gone higher.

Enough about me - YOU are in the right place. There are a lot of good people on here who have been through it all with their weight.

Best wishes with your weight loss journey, and see you around the forum!