[penmage]

You've already been given some excellent advice, so I won't repeat all of that.

You're definitely not the heaviest person here. If your friends are treating you like that, telling you things like that.... that doesn't sound like a friend to me.

I hope you are able to find something that works for you. No job should come at the expense of your health. Your health and sanity have to come first. Otherwise, what do you really have?

I wish you the best of luck in changing things in your life to make you happier and healthier. There are lots of supportive people to talk to here, any time you need it. You can do this!!

[melfitstar]

It's hard, and it seems like no one understands... But I think people here actually might, and I agree you are far from fattest. I know what you mean when you say you feel skinny people hate you/us for existing I've felt that way many times before. It's the feeling that prevents me from buying junk food when I want it, or have to buy a bunch of other groceries to dilute my junk food which I really plan on eating right away, etc...

I know a couple things for sure though. 1-it truly does take all kinds 2-if those people actually hate us, they are wasting their energy because at the end of the day when we lie awake in our beds it is only our opinions of ourselves which matter and 3-those opinions can change in an instant with small efforts and small successes.

It's cheesy, but I believe in the power of positive self talk. Tell yourself you're amazing--do it in the mirror. I know I don't know you, but if you're married, have a kid, and work full time I'm fairly certain it's okay to draw that conclusion. Tell yourself you're powerful and a force to be reckoned with. I'm sure you have worked hard for what you have, this will be hard too, especially if you're anything like me and turn to food for comfort. But I know we can do it... so let's!

(I've lost around 700 lbs in the last 13 yrs, at my heaviest now... this time needs to be the last time)