Hi friends! I'm 37 years old and have been overweight for 2.5 years. From about 2000-2010 I suffered from severe depression and anxiety, from just after grad school until I was 34. Strangely enough, I didn't gain the weight until I turned the corner and got control over my depression. I think I felt my new found mental health was so tenuous that I better not do anything that might make me sad, like not eating whatever I wanted. I live alone other than my two fabulous pooches and ate alot out of loneliness and boredom. So I put on 44 lbs. I wasn't thin before that but my BMI was at the upper edge of ok. Over the next two years I made a lot of progress mental-emotionally and in July 2012 I took my first leap: I quit smoking. I am still a nicotine addict (I use an electronic cigarette) but after four months without a cigarette I felt inspired to take my next leap: losing weight. I had already lost 6lbs just by becoming busier and more engaged: getting a position playing in an orchestra was a huge factor cuz I now practice a few hours per day on top of work (I have a dog grooming business). I feel alot more fulfilled now that I am involved in music again since that was the career that got derailed by depression.

Anyhow, I think these factors brought me to a place where I felt I could tackle the weight issue. I am not a very good cook and can't be bothered most of the time so I was eating chips for dinner less than two weeks ago. The diet I've chosen is just my own made-up plan of reduced calorie, reduced carb but anything goes in small quantities. In the past when I've lost weight (back in the days when I didn't really need to but tried to become a stick), 1200 cals was my number so I'm going for that but I'm being flexible and plan to allow 1600 here and there over the coming holidays.

My goal is 130lbs by May 27 (44 lbs in 25 weeks) but if I make it and can stand it, it wouldn't be unhealthy for me to be 117lbs, my dream weight. I am only 5 feet tall.

Thanks for reading. It's great to meet you all!

Welcome!!!
Depression and weight issues seem to go hand in hand :-(
Also a lot of anti-depressants have weight gain as a side effect.
Congrats on getting your depression under control. Good luck on your weight loss journey, you can do this!!!

Welcome. Congrats on getting started

Welcome, Fluffypuppy, and congrats on the weightloss so far! Your story sounds a lot like mine; we're around the same age, I also live alone (with a cat and dog), and ate a lot out of boredom and loneliness. And, I also recently quit smoking (about a month ago) and am now using an e-cig, although I'm starting to use it less and less. It's good to read someone's background so similar to mine and that we have the same goals! This site has been so instrumental in helping me to stay on track. I'm not following a particular diet and have just tried to lower calories and choose healthier foods (fresh fruit for breakfast versus pancakes and so on). I'm not much of a cook (it's not that I think I'm bad at it, I just cook way too much for a single person and I tend to not have time to slave in a kitchen) so I've designated Saturday afternoons as my cook day. I'll cook a stew or soup (this week is vegetable curry) and portion them into containers to take to work as lunch throughout the week. This weekend I'll try my hand at clam chowder. You'll be able to get a lot of advice/tips/support/motivation from the people here and hopefully you'll be able to meet your goals! Good luck and I look forward to seeing you around the forum!!

Thanks for the wRm welcome. Lakilaulea I checked out your blog and found it inspiring. Going to the movies tomorrow so that will be a challenge. I'm not terribly interested in the movie (it is my friend's choice) so it will be doubly hard not to entertain myself with food! Had a small victory at the grocery store today. Really wanted a big bag of cheese popcorn and tried to convince myself that I could manage to only eat a cup/day but came to the conclusion that I wanted it so bad it would be risky to have it around. I put it back on the shelf. Small victories.

That is a GREAT small victory!! I have a hard time turning down snacks I pass in the grocery store! Right now the supermarket I go to has these tubs of chocolate covered pretzels sprinkled with candycane pieces and I literally stare at them for minutes at a time while having an silent mental battle of wills in my brain! Strong me keeps saying I don't need it. Weak me keeps saying to just get it, it's seasonal! Sometimes weak me wins..... Thanks for checking out my blog; I need to update it more. It's actually really cathartic to write out my successes and failures. It helps me to remember why I'm doing what I'm doing. Good luck at the movies; hopefully you'll find what's playing more interesting than you think and it'll help take your mind off of snacks

Thanks! Too bad you couldn't just buy one pretzel instead of a whole bag. Do you have Bulk Barn where you are? Maybe you could go there and just buy one to get it out of your system. So glad to have found this place. Monday is weigh in day and I don't feel like I have lost any weight but I have been really good so I will be disappointed if not. Trying not to set myself up for a give-up binge if the scale hasn't moved. I decided not to weigh myself every day so as not to go on that emotional roller coaster. Once a week. How often do you weigh yourself?

I had the same problem----I was setting my bar real high when it came to pounds I expected to drop per week. I was looking for 4-6lbs, and when I didn't come anywhere near that, I'd sulk and binge and go two steps back. I had to learn to lower my expectations; I tend to lose no more than 1 1/2lbs. per week. And even if I don't lose---I've been maintaining the 212 for going on 3 weeks, I had to think as long as I'm not gaining, I shouldn't be complaining. It's hard, though.

I've never heard of Bulk Barn.... We have a Wegmans here that does sell those same type of pretzels, but larger and one per bag. I might get that next time the cravings get too bad. I weigh myself every few days, sometimes every day. First thing in the morning at about the same time wearing just my underwear. I know for a lot of folks that's too often and it can really bring you down when you see the numbers sit at the same place everyday, but I've become ok with that. I do it often because if I see the number go up two days in a row I know I have to switch something up.

Great chatting with you! I think 4-6 pounds/week might be unhealthy and you would probably gain it back really easily. I was aiming for 2 lbs/week but just now as I was writing in my journal I decided I would rather adjust my expectations than severely deprive myself. I need to be able to sustain the effort and not get miserable about it. I have also come to the realization that I probably have not been doing 1200 cals as I thought. I have been underestimating their caloric value of a few things that I eat regularly, like oil and vinegar salad dressing. I chalked it up to a beginner's mistake and am moving on.

Bulk Barn might be a Canadian thing. We don't have Wegmans but one biggish pretzel is probably better than a whole tub of little ones. Good idea. And you have to have a bit of the holiday stuff. My thing is candy cane ice cream. But unlike the cheese popcorn I told you about I know I can have it in the house and not eat the whole tub in a day or two.

Monitoring closely does have it's benefits, knowing right away if something is not working, like you said. And you don't have the problem I am now experiencing: waiting and wondering if the whole week has been a bust!