Hi everyone...

Isn't it funny how the more weight you gain, the more invisible you become?

So... I used to be a workout fiend. 2 times a day at the gym almost every day, kickin butt and takin' names. I was working out like this because I wanted to join the military- a dream I realized ever since I was a young girl. I got hurt there and honestly, found out that I had a lot of mental health issues that didn't really jive with the military life. Got married... gained the happy weight. I call it that to be ironic. It's the hugest source of misery in my marriage.

After 5 years, I've also battled infertility as well as letting my mental health issues come to a boiling point. It's been the last few months that I have come to terms with what 'unexplained infertility' meant after hoops jumped, surgeries hurdled, blood given, weird diets taken and one sex life that turned into something akin to a science experiment. I cannot have kids. I'm actually okay with it. There's so much freedom in being tiny human free.

There's a lot of things happening in my life. I start school in September. I am waiting for a breast reduction surgery (even at my thinnest 160lbs, I never dropped below a C... since I was 11, I've always been top heavy. Now I'm an E) My husband is leaving for Florida for a four month course in March. I get to go down for a few weeks in May and I want to be a smokin' hot mama for my husband.

I know where my problem is. Junk food. I am a binge-r. Because I'm on quite a few different mood stabilizers and anti depressants, my appetite is reduced. I have to remind myself to eat. So I resort to junk food and quick grab high carb, high sugar snacks at night because I have to eat with my meds. But what my biggest problem is Pepsi. Since getting home from military, I have consistently consumed well over 2L of pepsi a day.

TL;DR I hope that I can get some help in finding a good routine for myself that doesn't include going to the gym or buying equipment. I live in the boonies.

P.S. Crazy Dog Lady has not one, but three dogs. Hence the name. ^_^

Welcome!

Sorry to hear about all of the health issues. Since your a binger (like myself), if you can avoid having any junk food in your house that would be the best way to go. If its not there, you can't eat it. Calorie counting also helps me. I am a evening snacker, so I just make sure to save enough calories for the evening so that I do not feel deprived and want to give up.

You don't need a gym. Calorie counting will help you lose pounds, and exercise will just make your body more toned. You can go for walks, do Couch 2 5k (C25K) which is a free program, just google it or buy a workout dvd. Good luck!

It's funny that you say that-- my husband is completely opposed to calorie counting. He gets angry when he hears me mumble about it. I can't seem to change his mind... he thinks that calorie counting and dieting are wrong. And every time I suggest that we should diet, he thinks we should just exercise more and cut down portions. He doesn't think we are eating unhealthy.

While I admit, we do make some healthy choices- cut out a lot of dairy, milk is skim when it's used, grill and baking to frying. No added salt and reduced salt products when I can. When I do fry I use EVOO. Fresh veg, lean meats. But when we are hungry, we resort to nipping out to the store for a bag of chips or icecream. I don't keep any junk food in the house (besides Pepsi) , simply because I know that it'll get eaten in a flash and then we'll go hunting for more.

And when I crave Pepsi-- it's like one of those; if you get between me and a bottle of pepsi, you better step back or I'll go through you. No matter how much water I chug, it always comes back to that >.<

CDL, welcome, glad to have you join us. I suggest you look for a Challenge or Support group to join; small check-in groups make it easier to connect, get involved, and be accountable. We have groups centering around specific diet plans, themes, or age groups, so find one that inspires you and just post to join! Be sure to check out the Cal counting and Depression sub forums

First off, I'm right there with you on the crazy dog lady thing. Sort of... I have 2 dogs myself and have tried -keyword being tried- to get a third for a few months now. Three different dogs have come in and out of my house before I've finally called it quits. I don't know what the big difference is between 2 and 3, but for some reason it's just too many for me! If I could, I would have some land a ton of dogs roaming it. Hah! I love dogs.

It's kind of funny because I myself am completely motivated to lose my weight and get into shape so that I can enlist. I've never really had a goal like that and because of that goal, I have the most motivation to lose weight I've ever had in my life. Also the greatest fear of failing because I'm inching closer to the age cut off for the Air Force.

I think like Candeka said, you should definitely look into a fitness video or just getting out and walking! Not sure where you are and what the weather is there, but I know it's still chilly here, so for starting out, the fitness video might be the way to go. I'm looking into getting Jullian Michaels' 30 Day Shred (lots of forum threads on that) and Walmart sells it online for $7 and according to the website -I'm going to go check the store today- they have a kit that includes the DVD, a mat and 3lb weights for $20. So it's relatively inexpensive. Forgo the pepsi 24 pack and buy a DVD instead? I know that's asking a lot to go cold turkey. Instead though, have you tried the Pepsi One or Diet Pepsi (I think that's what they're called? I'm a Coke fan personally). Another thing I'll suggest with the diet colas is that for me, the Cherry Coke Zero tastes amazing. I think the cherry flavor gives the "diet" soda a little more kick. Maybe kind of try to wean yourself? I used to have at least 1 can of Cherry Coke Zero a day and sometimes 2, but since I've been more conscientious about my water intake and just what I'm eating period, I haven't touched a soda since I started almost a month ago.

Another thing I'll add is to make sure that you're eating enough, especially if you start some moderate to heavy intensity exercising. I struggled with this myself and my mother is driving me crazy because she's barely eating...and eating all the wrong things! She thinks it's ok to have one or two meals a day that total 600-700 calories. You need to find some healthy meals and snacks that will keep you satisfied instead of running to the store for the junk food. Keep a bag of baby carrots in the fridge and some fruit and tell yourself that if you're hungry (or even if you just want to put something in your mouth) that, that's it. You get that or nothing. I personally never was a big veggie eater, but since I've started bringing them in the house, I have turned to them or sometimes even just turned around and didn't eat anything.

In any case, I wish you the best of luck! You can totally do it!