Actually, I am more than a little pudgy. I come here a whopping 260 pounds. I am perpetually in a state of embarrassment about my weight. I delude myself into thinking that I am not good enough because I am fat, and that my self worth is based on my waistline. Logically, I know that I have much to offer the world, myself, and my loved ones. However, the voice inside of me has been stuck on replay for years, even when I was not fat, and I fear that if I do not lose this weight, it'll soon become too much for me to bear. I had to drop out of school in my senior year, because I had a panic attack every time I thought about going to classes, with all of those people scrutinizing me. If my work was not perfect, if I was otherwise not perfect, I automatically thought that everyone would expect it because I am fat. These are dysfunctional things to think. I know this, and I have always known this. I have had a number of bigger friends that I have never looked down on because they were bigger; I know people don't see people in skinny and fat. I didn't, but my illogical voice was telling me it was so. I compulsively overate to deal with my pain. I can't do that anymore.

Anyway, I have always had problems with weight. I just want to be normal.

More about me besides my weight:

I am a 23 year old almost college graduate, that is married, and as my name suggests, I love ferrets. I have four, who are my world, and at times, I fear they are the only ones in the world who see past the fat (again, an illogical fear). My husband has signed with the navy and so we are going to be relocating soon, out of KY. In any case, I would love to get into shape while we are going through this process so that I can show that I am doing something hard too, and so that I can be in better spirits to go back to school and finish my degree.

I startd a diet this week, alond with 30 mins of exercise a day, at least five days a week. I usually heavy hands (walking while swinging weight), as it is a great way to get your heartrate up. I am not a stranger to walking four or five miles in a stint, as neither hubby or I drive, and we walk to get groceries and other things. I hope that being on this forum will help me to find the support I need to keep me motivated, and to help me feel like I am not alone. I know that I am not the only one, and that helps.

Anyway, Hi all!

Welcome!! So glad you joined us here!! Reading about your ferrets.. I just want to give you a hug! I feel like that all the time about my daughter.. I think she is the only person in the world who doesn't see all the fat and judge me and just sees her mommy. No matter if its a kid or a fur kid it is wonderful to have that love from someone who loves you just cause you're you!

Good luck on your journey hun! I am sure you can do it!!

It does make a difference, to have someone or something who can just see you. I'm not a skin kid momma yet, but I sure do love my furbabies. Thank you for the welcome and the encouragement. I am excited to start seeing results, but I know that I have to be patient. It's a slow and steady loss, and that's what matters.

Welcome, Glad to have you join us. I like the term 'illogical voice", that perfectly puts those thoughts into perspective! My advice is to look for a Support group, Chat, or Challange to join; small groups make it easier to get connected. Most sub-forums have groups covering almost every need, find one that inspires or motivates you and just post to join. You might try the '20-somethings' for a start.

Thanks! This is quite a large forum with a range of needs, and I know that I can really benefit from having all of these people and resources here. I will definitely browse the 20-somethings section. Thank you for the welcome.

Welcome to the forums! I am new here as well and am just starting a new diet this week like you!

Awesome! Good luck to you as well, I am sure you will be wonderful! I see that this place looks like a great place to find support

Welcome, Bluegrasser, from a Volunteer State friend just south of you! Well, I live in Asia now, but I'm a born and bred southerner Congrats on starting your weight loss process- you sound like you are committed and have a great attitude so I'm sure you'll find success. Best wishes