[rakel]

Well, I've been meaning to join a support forum for some time now, there has just been a lot on my mind. Let's see. Where to start. Well, I've been overweight pretty much all my life & struggled with it. I've tried to lose weight many times, but I've always gotten discouraged or maybe I just didn't have enough stamina to see it through -- whatever the case, I finally decided to do something when I tipped the scale at 308 pounds. A million thoughts raced through my head. How could I let this happen? Why didn't I start this sooner, when I only had 50lbs to lose? Weight has been a sensitive issue and though I had been gaining, I let myself forget about it, and whenever my boyfriend (now fiance) mentioned it, I would explode, cry, feel exceptionally depressed and pretty much just hate life. It was easier for me to just ignore it, and return to food as my comforter, not the bane of my existence. I'm slowly learning that you can't live in the past. All you've got is what is in front of you and there is no use wishing that I could alter history or choose some other lot for my life. This is it. This is my struggle and I have been hiding from it long enough.

It's hard to know when the program will stick for good now... I've done it all before, as I'm sure many of you have. But this time... this time my fiance is holding me accountable for every calorie I take in and every calorie I burn, and I must say it helps. It's easy to be lenient on myself. "Well, it's okay, I lost 5lbs so I can reward myself with a gigantic Milkshake just this once!" ... I've been working on this for about 3 weeks now and have lost about 10 lbs. I'm hoping to reach my goal of 130 in 2 years or less. It seems... unfathomable to say the least. I can't imagine what it would be like to weigh 130 lbs. I haven't weighed that much since I was like 12 years old. I don't think I will know what to do with myself. I've never been anything but the fat kid, so that should be interesting. I am trying to think of it as a reality and not just a dream.

SO, it's like 3:00am and I should really get to bed, but I just signed up and wanted to introduce myself RIGHT AWAY! I am really excited to be here and hope to make some great friends to encourage and be encouraged along the way. This looks like a great & vibrant community

- Rakel

[hellokitty81668]

Hi ,

I think anything is possible if you want it bad enough. I have spent 17 yrs gaining and gaining, so I have no one to blame but myself. I always used the excuse that I couldn't loose the weight. Well I surprised myself , by loosing the weight. I know you can do it too!! good luck
cheryl

[HeatherAngel]

Hi! and welcome

Sometimes it is not a good idea to focus on your ultimate goal - sometimes it is though, it does motivate some people! - it doesn't motivate me. It scares the crap out of me, and I feel daunted, like I have so far to go, and then I have tended to give up, in the past. Thinking a lot about how MUCH weight I have to lose is the road to disaster for me.

Find what works for you, and keep working it! And post lots so we get to know you!

Heather

[rakel]

Yeah I know what you mean. I stop and think, "Holy cow. I have to lose like 167 lbs. It's like I have to give birth to a grown man." But one thing that keeps encouraging me is the fact that despite my "rapid" weight gain, I will probably be able to lose it faster than I put it on. It took me about 10 years to get to this point, and if I remain diligent I can probably reach my goal in 1 or 2 years. THAT in and of itself helps keep me going... that and it hasn't gotten *that* tough yet. I can be pretty impatient though so if I don't see results for awhile I know that is where this forum will come in handy!

I'm really encouraged to see so many people here that are/were around the same weight as me. It's nice to know that there are others out there struggling with the same things I am struggling with, I don't feel so alone or such a "freak of nature" -- everyone I know in real life is pretty thin or "normal", or not much overweight if any. It can be hard to relate to someone who just needs to lose 15lbs when I need to lose 150+.