[TinkerBell1279]

Just thought I should stop in and say hello to everyone out there!
I have been trying to get to my goal weight (170) for the past two years with not a lot of help from anyone but my mom. I have actually lost a couple friends due to my weight loss which really sucks. They were all smiles and happy for me at the begining ... but once the weight started to come off and my confidence started to grow the fangs came out. I'm having a hard time dealing with this, and yes I know if they can't be happy for me they weren't really good friends to begin with. It's just a really hard thing to have to go through. I was down to 178lbs when all of this was going on and because of it I started to feel bad and ... yup you guessed it, turned to food. So I ended up putting quite a bit of the weight back on - infact I went back up to 200lbs. It was at that point that I knew it was either my friends or my happiness ... can you guess what I picked??
So now I'm back on track and was so glad to have picked up the O magazine and read the artical about this site. So here I am with a new hope that I can and will reach my goal this time around.

[FierceOne]

I'm sorry about your friends. The whole friend situation can definitely be tough. I tried healthy eating a few years back and some of my friends (all pencil thin by the way) didn't understand and in turn thought I was getting boring. Just because of what I ate and how I exercised! It's key to have a good support group behind you. I guess that's why I joined this site... hoping I might be able to get that extra boost of confidence! Good luck!

[Mom2QJandT]

That really bites. I have a friend that, instead of ditching me, has started telling people how much weight she has lost too. That wouldn't be so bad if she had actually lost any. We were at a conference (we work together) and some of the girls that we hadn't seen in awhile were asking me all about the weight loss and she chimed in with "I've lost 45 too". The whole table went silent. It is just amazing what people will do out of jealousy. Keep your chin up and remember, "you can't control the actions of others, only how you choose to react".

[Cheryl14]

Hi Tink!

Welcome!

I'm sorry that your friends cannot be happy for you, but some people tend to be in the "misery loves company" mindset! Once you were not as fat and miserable as they still probably are, you became the "traitor" to the relationship.

People can be this way about a number of things. When I first began dating my future husband-to-be back in seventh grade, my "best friend" got very angry at me. I wasn't spending all my time with her anymore, and she was NOT happy! At one point she actually gave me an ultimatum -it was HER or HIM! Can you believe that? She did not have a boyfriend at the time, and she didn't want ME to have one either!

Needless to say, you KNOW which one I chose! As the years went on. she would stick like glue to one "friend" after another. As the girls got boyfriends, she would drop them and give them the "You are invisible to me" treatment. I saw her a couple months ago after not having seen her for over THIRTY YEARS! I went up to her and said, "HI! How are you?" She looked at me, gave a smirky look and walked RIGHT PAST ME! Can you believe it?

I hope that YOUR friends won't be like my "friend" was, but if they are -GET NEW FRIENDS! Above all, don't let anyone or anything cause you to put even one tiny bite in your mouth. Eat because you are hungry and you know that the food you are eating is good and healthy for you. LOVE YOURSELF!

Stick around here! There are lots of great people who will encourage you instead of discourage you!

Cheryl

[JayEll]

Cheryl14--wow--some people never get out of seventh grade!

Mom, that friend needs help!

Tink Hang in there! Sometimes our friends just don't want us to change, but we have to anyway. Good luck!

Jay