Hi everybody! I'm new here - looking for a friendly, positive community to join. I hope this is the place I'm searching for. I'll go ahead and introduce myself~!

I am a survivor of domestic abuse and I suffer from an anxiety disorder. I consider my "birthday" to be September 20th, 2005. It's the day I declared my freedom. It's the day I walked out and never looked back.

Since then, I have been in therapy for my anxiety, and I've been making beautiful progress. Specifically, I've been told I have Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, but I'm not sure. Sometimes, I get really shy around people I don't know, and for a time, I was severely agoraphobic. I've also struggled with depression in the past. Now, I feel like a completely new person, and I can't wait to see who I continue to turn into. It's like meeting the real me for the first time.

Yet, despite everything... there's one thing I just haven't even been able to begin to overcome.

My weight.

My weight has always been something weighing heavily on my heart (no pun intended). My family was also overweight. Their "apologies" often consisted of a raspberry danish or a bowl of ice cream - and I ate it right up. So many times, when I look in the mirror, I see my mother's face. It kills me inside. Many of her health problems are slowly becoming my health problems. Many of her habits are slowly becoming my habits. I refuse to be angry, I refuse to be abusive, and I refuse to be overweight. The cycle stops now.

I have been devoting myself to creating a new me: the REAL me. I don't want to neglect my health, my body, or my self esteem anymore. It's time to get healthy and live a long life of happiness, laughter, and love. So, this is why I want to lose weight. I want to feel great on the inside and look great on the outside.

...and that's me. It's a pleasure to meet you all.

Welcome Daisy: My great-grandmother's name was Daisy; and there's a really cute song about that name, but you're probably too young to know it. You've come to a wonderful, supportive place. There are some special forums here that you might find helpful.

Give yourself time to settle in; look around; post often; but most of all, have fun too. I think you'll find some young ladies here that you can relate to very well. Glad you joined us ~ a fellow encourager ~ Rosebud.

Thank you for the warm welcome, Rosebud. So far, I've really liked what I've seen here.

It's really nice to meet you! I'm so happy to be here.

Hi and welcome! You've come to the right place for support and help with weight loss. Tell us a little more about what you'd like to eat and do for exercise ... and we'll see what we can do for you.

Hi Jo!

Welcome!

you have had a lot to deal with in your short life, but you also sound like a well-grounded and strong individual. One of my very favorite sayings of all time is "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger." I am a FIRM believer in that! You are still alive despite all that has come at you, so you ARE a survivor and you ARE stronger for having gone through it all! Congratulations on being a strong woman!

Weight loss is a tough undertaking, but it is possible. I've found that setting small goals, reaching them, rewarding myself with non-food rewards, and journalling my successes has helped me tremendously. In my journal I write down my thoughts, ny dreams, my successes, and all about my progress that I have made in the many areas of my life. Staying positive is so important!

Make a list of the reasons you want to lose the weight. Keep this list handy for times when the kitchen seems like the only good spot in the house. Put the list IN the kitchen if you need to! You can do this, and we are there for you!

Cheryl

Thanks for the warm welcome!

I'm really not sure how to answer either of those questions. I'm not fond of low carb diets, I like veggies a lot, and I need to avoid sugar and caffeine. As for exercise, I'm going to start walking every day (although it's still really cold outside where I am) and I've got a bunch of workout videos that are dying to be used. I'm also a big fan of Dance Dance Revolution, so I figure I'll try to get back into dancing regularly again.

Oh, and thank you so much for the kind words and warm welcome, Cheryl!! Those are some really great suggestions and I'll keep them in mind. I already keep a journal and it helps SO much... I think a list of goals would be a great motivational too.

Nice to meet you all again!

Hi Jo! Welcome !!

I can relate a wee bit to your intro post. I am a survivor of molestation and sexual assault and I was only recently diagnosed with PTSD myself! I have had anxiety issues in the recent past as well. All of this was triggered when I split up with my now EX husband a couple of years ago. For some reason, all of my survival techniques up until that moment just stopped working AND backfired on me. I had a real hard time finding it in me to make a committment to weight loss (I've done it before and I gained all my weight back during a VERY dark period in my life).

The good thing is... the sun always comes out to shine after the storm That means all you have to do is keep talking, keep coming here and you will get that ONE post that sets off the lightbulb for you and you'll be on your way. Everyone is here to help. I'm here to help If you ever want to talk about anything, I'm just a PM away.

We're almost the same height and weight / have the same goals too !

You're definitely in the right place!

hi honey

as i was reading your thread, i found myself identifying quite closely with your story. i too, am a survivor of domestic violence. and i understand the motions of what you have had to go through/are still going through. i'm happy for you that you have become reborn, so have i and i wish the best of luck to you with that.

during the course of the time i was down, i gained a lot of weight, so much that currently i'm the heaviest i've ever been. i also want to change my life around. i'm sick of going out with my friends and always being the heaviest of the bunch... it's gotten to the point where i dont even want to go out with them anymore, i dont have any clothes to wear my motivation is to also become healthier... as it would greatly improve the quality of my life and in the process, make being reborn all the more rewarding.

how have you gone about making diet/exercise changes? have u made any progress?

thanks again for sharing.

Morning Daisy ... vegetables are fabulous and so is lean protein. And you are right on track witht the exercise. Whatever you can do and like ... do it!

Positive. Active. Supportive. It is good and ends in -ive... we have it for you.

Daisy, I know what you mean by apologies being food. My grandmother did that my whole life. My mom, too. They had A LOT to be sorry for!
When my daughter and I fight, I find myself almost doing the same thing and then just saying sorry. It sure helps so much more to say the words than it does to pretend what happened<a few harsh words or when I'm wrong> didn't happen.
I wish for you nothing but the best. I am new here, too and hope that we can all reach our goal weights without much pain. It's been my experience<not followed> that in order to lose the weight we have to face what put us there.
I think that will be harder than walking, working out and the dieting.
Thankfully there are sites like this. I can't stop reading.

Wow, such a warm welcome. Thank you, everybody! I feel so at home already.

I haven't made much progress yet, as I'm just getting started... but my husband and I are going to start working out together today! I'm so excited and nervous.. lol. I figure, lots of high fiber, whole foods, lean proteins... they're going to be my new best friends.

I've found myself pulling the whole "food apology" thing to other people in my life too. I'm trying to knock that off, as it just isn't a good practice.

Thanks again, everybody! It's so nice to meet everyone! I really enjoyed reading all your responses. It's also really nice to know that other people know where I'm coming from. I know I've gained a lot of weight due to the anxiety and depression.... but I'm determined to lose all the excess baggage I have, including those pounds.

Oh, on a very happy note, today is my one year wedding anniversary!! I'm so excited and happy about it!