I SOOOO need to lose about 50 lbs. I'm sick of myself. When I'm in public, I'm invisible. You'd think that's good for a fat person, but anybody who used to be thin knows how depressing it is. I don't want people falling all over themselves over me, but, well, you've seen the news shows where a fat chick goes out & about , then a thin chick goes the same places? I used to think fat people were just lazy slobs. Then I became one. I'm not lazy, and I'm not a slob. I'd rather stay home so I can hide. I feel disgusting and don't want anything to do with my husband because I feel so disgusting. I've lost alot of weight before, and felt great, but this family isn't supportive of healthy eating. I'm the only one with the weight problem. I'm just so sick of joint pain and being uncomfortable in my own skin. There are heart problems in my mom's family, and it scares me. But how in the world can I do this when my own family won't support me or even congratulate me on a 5 pound loss???? I actually need to lose anout 50 pounds, but that is so daunting, that I'm going for a 20 pound loss first.

Ok hope this helps. We will support you and We will congratulate you when you've lost .5, 1, 5, or 50 lbs. If someone isn't along for the ride then they can they need to step to the side as you keep it moving. This is about you, whats right for YOU. I think eventually they will jump on the wagon, but if not who cares it is how You feel about YOU that matters the most. I think it is better to feel happy in your own skin than how other people feel about you.

When they aren't supporting you, think about how you'll feel when your joint pain lessens, or being able to do things you can't do now. Trust me it is worth it.


Rather than hide get up, get moving...do something that is going to make you feel better and help you towards your goal. Rather than focus on 50 lbs, try 5, or 10.

For me I find it is easier to focus on minutes or miles of excercise. Try 15 min a day and work your way up.

Try and find something positive to focus on. You have taken a step just by posting, and it is one step at a time.

Does anyone have a problem with retaining water? About a month ago I noticed that my fingers were really swollen in the mornings. I assumed it was from too much salt, but it's still happening even though I've reduced my salt intake. I quit adding it to my food, and quit eating microwave popcorn (BAD for salt!). I'm drinking more water and eating more veggies, so what's up???
I hate to exercise. I think it's really boring. Any ideas on how to make it fun, or at least not snooze-worthy?

Hey Obsidian, I just read your blog. Very interesting. I take it you are a "black jem"? Anyway, I don't go to Starbucks, but I do understand the food display dangers. I went to get groceries the other day and had to stay completely away from the junk food isles! I actually heard the iced animal cookies calling my name like forlorn children!LOL! But I managed to get out of the store without junk. Then my step-son was looking in the fridge and wanted to know where all the food was. He actually meant cake and potato chips and other junk. So, my family is disappointed, but I don't have any temptations to wrestle with!!!

You might want to start a new for this topic, so people see it.



Um ok I'm a little slow does black jem mean black? If so yeah, thats me

Yeah, I didn't have to do much emptying out when I started, but I can't buy certain ice creams or cookies and stuff because I will focus on it. (ben and jerry's is a big weakness).

How is everything going since your first post?

For me this was trial and error. I do the watp the lbs dvds because I fit them in my schedule and in the beginning I could barely get through 1 mile. Some people mention the elliptical machine at the gym as being really good as well.

I don't think I am one of the peoples who really LOVE working out, but I think of it as something I just need to do to live. Pay bills, wash dishes, take out the trash, walk my miles. funny, I love sweating I think it is like an outward representation of how hard I am working...LOL no idea if it is true, but it gets me through.

Anyway, try browing the excercise forum, and the videos sections.

Also at some point someone is going to tell you that weights are going to be necesary. I don't think they are, but for me they are very nice ways to workout while I build my endurance, and they will help you metabolism and fat burning.

Look up the word "obsidian." I only did because it was an unfamiliar word. I didn't know if it was a name or what. I'm a book worm, can ya tell??
Anyway, things are kinda slow, but I guess that's ok. A slow weight loss is suppose to be healthier, right? I'm making cookies and brownies for our town's new year's eve party right now. Good thing I'm not ga-ga for chocolate! I'm actually looking forward to a salad when I'm finished!

ah ok what sure what jem was (gem?) black volcanic rock. Hope you have a happy new year.

I know exactly how you feel and you are braver than I.

I still buy the junk food for my family, my husband would revolt if I did not. So my life consists of making two versions of meals one for the rest of the family and one for me. Sometimes its easy, some not.

I'm roughly halfway to my goal and can notice the difference in my knees and leg - they dont hurt as much and my acid reflux is gone! Just try to concentrate on the good and you will be fine.

My dictionary said it's black volcanic rock that's made into gemstones. I thought that was cool and that you were being clever with your user name. Then I thought I was clever for figuring it out. Guess I'm not ready for CSI yet. LOL
Luckily this party will have lots of veggies, too.
I'm down to 219.5! WAHOOOEY!!

Hi Cole! I tried that whole making 2 seperate meals thing about 4 years ago. I lost 30 pounds, but have since gained it (plus) back. I don't have the willpower to keep junk in the house and not eat it. I just told my husband last night that I'm going to start eating healthier---WE ALL are going to eat healthier. I'm not talking tofu and twigs, but let's cut back on the white carbs! More veggies & fruit and fiber, ya know? there's just no sense in making noodles AND potatoes AND buscuits with hamburger in one meal, ya know?? Oh ya, they'll revolt, but I absolutely CANNOT go on like this.
I want to be pain free, I want to be "pant free" (as in not panting after walking up my stairs).