2beskinnyagain Thank you!

I am getting closer to "something" because I honestly don't know what my goal is anymore

In the clinic I said 175lbs which I'm 9lbs away, but the one I wanted is 165lbs and I recorded that here in 3FC , but I'm thinking that's still a big number, I do not want to be fat anymore, there are all sorts of people some are skinny, slim, toned, chubby, a bit fat, fat, super fat, super, super fat, and I do not want to be in any way thought of being a fat person...
I "feel" right now that I'm still a fat person, even though I'm not a plus size anymore, I think I'm fat...my family say that if someone sees me they won't think I'm fat (but then I think they say that because they love me, and because they've seen me at 258lbs before!) I am big boned and I'm 5'3 so I know my body frame has a lot to do with the number in the scale, and I shouldn't fixate on it!! I can't change my broad bones, I wish I could though

Over the weekend I saw a friend, he told me I looked very good, I told him I was thinking on losing another 30lbs, and he said that would be too much, I would look too skinny and he said about 10 would be ok...so I'm STILL fat, if I get to my 165lbs I won't be 'looked' as a fat person anymore....Ahhhh, that felt good, had to get it out!
So, what tea is it that you're drinking
2beskinnyagain?
I am not a tea person, I'm a coffeeholic person!

and even more now with the diet, it feels like it wasn't the only yummy thing that wasn't taken away from me!! and I also drink LOTS of water when before I couldn't really drink a glass of it...Well, I still have sleeping issues, I can't get myself to sleep!!! I'm up like an owl, and when talking to coach, well a couple of them, they said that being unable to sleep, meant I have a lot of energy, and that's a sign of ketosis, and to cut down on coffee, not to drink it too late - now, before the diet, I could drink a cup of coffee before going to bed and I could still sleep like a baby- so it is odd to me to be having these sleeping problems due to coffee, its the ketosis mode, not my caffeine, but I really want, NEED to sleep, so I'll try my best to not drink it late. My coach suggested to drink a calming, relaxing tea, I bought it yesterday, but I didn't drink it, and yes, I was up very late, thankfully we're on break, but I do need to try that tea and hopefully it helps because even thought I'm glad I'm in ketosis, I really, really need and miss Morpheus
Augustians!!!