[freelancemomma]

Hi all,

So I recently reached my goal weight of 145 lbs, which puts me in the healthy range (133 to 179 lbs) for my height. Everyone's been telling me how great I look, except for my sister-in-law, who told me I look anorexic. (I consider myself slim, but certainly not scrawny and I can definitely "pinch an inch.") I also get the impression she's trying to sabotage my weight maintenance efforts. Whenever we go to her house she offers me cakes, cookies and ice-cream, and if I say I'd like a small piece she'll cut me a huge one. If I proceed to give my husband half, she'll say something like, "Oh come on, it's not going to kill you."

I should add that she's never liked me, but in this case I think it's safe to say that the problem is more hers than mine. She's also cut her brother (a great guy) entirely out of her life because she felt he wasn't "an involved enough uncle" to her kids. So now her kids have no genetically related uncle at all.

In any case, I'm wondering what the best way to deal with her might be. I've come to terms with her dislike of me, but her digs still get to me. Thoughts or parallel experiences?

Freelance

[sontaikle]

Even the most supportive people can turn on you when you lose weight. I can only imagine the ones who aren't supportive!

I've had something similar with my mom and the best advice I've found is to simply ignore and keep maintaining your weight. It might be the best "up yours" to her that you can get. I can at least talk to my mom about it (and I have) but I assume your SIL just won't listen to reason.

Oh and if you can, serve yourself dessert. That always seems to keep the opinions at bay for me. I'll usually say "I'll have some in a minute," and then serve myself when everyone else has been served.

That "I'll have some in minute" or any variation works when offered just about anything you don't want. People usually forget you didn't have any and you're not directly refusing.