I had to deal with TWO of you today that are like this. Whether you mean well but have no clue as to how to respect boundaries or are a selfish git that doesn't care about boundaries... it comes off as rude.
I could drown my anger in emotional eating but I won't. You've taken up more of my time and brain power today than you deserve, and I don't need you on my hips following me around all the time everywhere. Thppppt!
I am NOT a doctor nor do I play one on TV. I took time off work, drove a ridiculously long way to your office, filled out a ridiculous amount of paperwork, and waited a ridiculously LONG time to see you, and am paying a ridiculous amount of money for this privilege. Why? To get your professional opinion about my dd's injury.
So WHY do you look at me with that pitying, "you really should know better" look on your face and ask me "why did it take you so long to bring her in?"
Um, because the other 3 doctors she saw for the last 2 weeks who wouldn't accept liability and give me some advice I could use kept referring me to the hospital, whereupon they FINALLY told me yesterday to bring her to you! So I feel I was pretty prompt.
Omg! Why, oh why, do some people take any information a heavy person has about health or diet as complete rubish? Sure, I am fat, but it doesn't mean I am ignorant...why the need to try and disprove my beliefs about something (unless are just completely off the wall). But if I base my information on something factual, why act as if anything I know must be wrong?
I know a person who has admitted to having an eating disorder (the kind that keeps you slim, not my kind, that makes me fat), and it always seem like there isn't a melding of minds. If I have a belief about something, this person doesn't agree with it, but always wants to share their beliefs with me. This person even sometimes watches a bit too closely what I am eating. It makes me feel like I have to eat in private, which is not a good thing to start doing.
I know you're trying to be kind when you say 'oh honey, you don't need to diet' any time I turn down ANYTHING but for one, i do, for two, please don't tell everyone in hearing distance that I'm on a 'diet' so that they too can judge my belly, for three, i'm still eating with you, i'm just not eating as much, and for four, it's condescending.
I really wish you would stop looking at everything I am eating. Yes, picking up my food to read the label is extremely rude. I understand that you have a weight issue of your own, and you obviously fear gaining any kind of weight, but please, stop pushing your beliefs and thoughts and prejudices on me. It is not your business what I eat, when I eat, or how much I eat.
Well it looks like no one has vented in a while, which is probably a good thing as it means more people are happy.
What I want to vent about today is.....people who snoop at what you are eating, make comments about what you should be eating, but act as if you are an idiot when you try and discuss living a healthier lifestyle. It is as if anything you say they automatically cannot believe. Sigh.
Last edited by milliondollarbbw; 05-18-2010 at 10:02 PM.
What I want to vent about today is.....people who snoop at what you are eating, make comments about what you should be eating, but act as if you are an idiot when you try and discuss living a healthier lifestyle. It is as if anything you say they automatically cannot believe. Sigh.
This. When I have discussed health issues with some people, i.e, my dad, he has gone on to my mom to say that I have no business talking about healthy foods because I'm fat. For one thing, he brought up the topic. For another, being fat doesn't make me an idiot. (If I recall, I was only suggesting that paying attention to the total calories he ate in a day might be more productive than trying to not eat after 5pm, which causes him to binge late at night). Also, I have lost weight before, so I might know a few things about it, even if I did gain it back.
Also my relatives who tell me I "don't really need that," referring to a food, or my mom suggesting all the time that I should be out exercising, as if I don't know I am overweight and am too stupid to figure out that I should lose weight to be healthier. I am trying. Belittling me is not helping. Also, she is no string bean, either, so it's terrible condescending when she says I'm fat. she actually called me "enormous" last week, and then she acts like she is being helpful and motivating.
This. When I have discussed health issues with some people, i.e, my dad, he has gone on to my mom to say that I have no business talking about healthy foods because I'm fat. For one thing, he brought up the topic. For another, being fat doesn't make me an idiot. (If I recall, I was only suggesting that paying attention to the total calories he ate in a day might be more productive than trying to not eat after 5pm, which causes him to binge late at night). Also, I have lost weight before, so I might know a few things about it, even if I did gain it back.
Also my relatives who tell me I "don't really need that," referring to a food, or my mom suggesting all the time that I should be out exercising, as if I don't know I am overweight and am too stupid to figure out that I should lose weight to be healthier. I am trying. Belittling me is not helping. Also, she is no string bean, either, so it's terrible condescending when she says I'm fat. she actually called me "enormous" last week, and then she acts like she is being helpful and motivating.
((hugs)). I think our family means well, but they just don't know how what they say can be so discouraging at times.
My vent of the day is that I didn't get to be over 300lbs. because I don't know what a calorie is. I am over 300lbs. because I needed to learn how to eat in a way that kept me feeling satisfied (yes, I can binge and eat a whole bag of those rice cake things, and still be hungry!), and yet, kept the calories low and didn't make me feel like I would sell kisses for cookies, ya know? So, it is hard when other people who know my just say no foods will tell others that it is really only about moderation. Sigh. The disconnect is that moderation is easy if you dont have severe hunger issues, but when you have a pastry and are thisclose to going out and buying a dozen to eat, then yeah, something in the food is making your bingeing a bit out of control.
