Virginity
 

What age were you when you lost your V-Card. Any regrets? Was it to a husband or wife? Would you lost it to the same person again?

Probably showing my age - but it was my wedding day (and I am still married to the same person almost 30 years later)
:)
And yes, I would do it exactly the same way again :D

OK, I'm game.

I was 14, he was 18, we were both clueless. It wasn't great, but it wasn't horrible either. No regrets at all. All skills get better with practice. ;)

There's a lot of emotional baggage tied up with the whole virginity thing, and it doesn't need to be a big deal. Odds are it won't be the stuff dreams are made of, so if you go in with lower expectations, you won't be disappointed.

Now, I'm sure there are a few romantics out there who had a Harlequin Romance first time, but I wasn't one of them.

This is a difficult subject for me. I was 13, had self-esteem you could measure in negative figures, and didn't really understand what was happening at the time.

If I had the chance to take back what happened, I would. I don't think I would have waited for marriage, but I would definitely like to have been more in control of the situation.

Ok i will spill....

I was 13 too. not my best decision ever. it was not all that memorable and the guy at the time actually ended up being my first love. Of course later on i hit my rebellion stages and at 16 had my first of 3 sons. Although this happened i had a great family support system and ended up being a successful teen mother.

I lost it when I was 18 going on 19. I never had any serious relationships before then. nearly 2 years later and I'm still with the guy. I don't regret it, however I wish that we would have waited longer into our relationship.

I was 19, and drunk. I wish I waited. Never spoke to him again.

I was 15. He dumped me a week later, so yes, I wish I would have waited.

Some things should be left in the closet. ;)

I was in my late 20s and I'm very grateful for that decision. It wasn't that I was waiting to get married (because I wasn't) but I was waiting to be with someone who I truly felt a mutual interest in a long term, serious relationship and that I felt I'd be with for a while. We were only together for a year and after we broke up, I almost wish we hadn't because the breakup devastated me but looking back I don't regret it.

I know for various people they can do it for purely physical reasons or even just partially physical reasons but for me, it is almost 100% emotional. Which is one reason I'm glad I didn't do it earlier.

I lost mine when I was 18, about 2 months after I graduated high school. It was with a boy I'd been sort of involved with for 3 years. Its been a year since then and I am still with him. I don't regret it, I always wanted to wait til I was out of high school so I wouldn't have to deal with all the immaturity and gossip.

I lost my virginity when I was 20, to my now-fiance. Of course, I wasn't yet in love with him when I lost my virginity to him, since we did it literally 5 days after meeting in Florence, Italy. I had just dropped 80 lbs and, really, I just wanted to lose my virginity. Heh. I liked him and he liked me and I figured, "If you're not going to do it with a cute foreign guy while you're in Italy, when ARE you going to do it??" Of course, we got to know each other better after that and fell in love and we're getting married in a month from today. So, no regrets at all.

Edit: But I think even if we'd had our fling while I was in Florence for those few months and then didn't stay together, or just remained friends or whatever, I wouldn't have regretted losing it then. The time had come and it was a good time to lose it -- I wasn't a kid anymore, but I was still young, in college, and perfectly sober/lucid all the while. Plus, I think he's SO good looking and nice (even if we didn't fall in love) that the likelihood of me finding someone else so ideal to lose it to was VERY slim.

I was twenty, almost twenty-one. It was with someone who I'd known for a few years and I had a huge crush one him. I don't regret it, but it was very tough emotionally, since he wasn't in it for a relationship. He broke it off on my twenty-first birthday. Yeah, ouch! Years later, I'm still friends with him, although I don't see him too often. He really wasn't a bad guy, he just had issues at the time (don't we all sometimes.)

I must say, I'm really glad I waited until I was an adult.

17. to my best friend. when i think about it, it is with mixed feelings. He is the only person I was ever with that sex meant anything and I don't expect it to mean anything with anyone ever again. I've been married for 6 years now & to me it's just- a thing to do and has nothing to do with a relationship or love or emotions. then again, i am an abuse survivor too... and i'm sure that has a lot to do with my attitude toward sex and men in general.

funny story, mom and i were talking one day after i was grown and married and she told me she thought it was with a boyfriend i had when i was 14! lol. i think given my behavior she was shocked i waited until i was 17.

I was 16, it was the night after prom (so cliche!) and I had been with him for 2.5 months. He was my first serious boyfriend, and we were together for three years after. I don't regret it one bit. (However, that's not to say I coud have made better choices sleeping with some of the others on my list!)

I do try to live life by the mantra, "I do not regret the things I have done, but those I did not do." So I just chalk things up to experience and move on.

I was 19. I was always terrified of getting pregnant in high school, so I waited it out. The guy and I only lasted 3 months, but I wouldn't change it. It happened, I thought I loved him, and I was responsible about it.
I married the second guy I was with, and if not for the two beautiful daughters I got from the marraige, I'd regret that one.

Now I'm with someone I've known most my whole life, and, aside from my kids, he's the best thing to happen to me.

I guess I waited longer than others... I was 22... He was someone I was "dating" but he was never serious about me, but I was quite in love with him at the time. We only saw eachother for a couple weeks after. I guess I don't really regret it now, though I think I would have waited for the Next Guy because he and I are friends all these years later. My husband (who was not the Next Guy) says he wouldn't not have been interested in me if he found out I was a virgin.

I was 19 and had been engaged for a year and with him for 3. Now we are happily married. It was so beautiful....I wouldn't change a thing.

PS. About 18 months before our wedding, we decided to be abstinent. It was a good choice and allowed us to go through premarital counseling focusing on what was really important. It also made wedding night awesome! :D

One month before my 18th birthday, with my first serious boyfriend. When I told him it was painful, he said (and I quote) "Sometimes, you've got to take one for the team".

I should have run the heck out of there right at that moment. But I didn't...we stayed together for 2 and a half years. Eek.

I don't regret it, because it was going to happen anyway. Now I'm with a man who is so wonderful and considerate, and would never DREAM of saying anything like my ex did. So sometimes, I wish it could have been with him instead.

Live and learn, right??

This was exactly my experience. Only I can add that they guy brought a gaggle of friends to watch my 'deflowering' in the window. I found out a week later when all of his friends started hitting on me after he dumped me. I remember crying because it hurt so bad.

I can't tell you the damage this did to my self esteem and my views on sexuality...even to this day. It had a devastating effect on my judgement of men all through my 20's and 30's.

I didn't get married until I was 37, so waiting would have been nearly impossible, but I have always been envious of people that waited until their wedding night.

12, stoned and a random guy I had met that same night laster less than two mins. For me to then go puke , I think that somehow I would of rather of waited.

I don't think waiting until 37 is virtually impossible. I knew someone who waited until their wedding night and was in his early 30s. His wife waited as well and she was mid 20s.

Maybe its just me but I've known many people who didn't have sex until their early/mid 20s.

I also know quite a few people who waited until they were older to have sex... and I know a few people who are STILL virgins, even at around 24 - 27 years old (and not for religious reasons either -- they just want to find someone special before they do it).

But I do think that for most people waiting to have sex until you're in your 30's is unlikely to happen.. unless you have a particular belief-system that you adhere to that forbids sex before marriage, that is.

I was 22. It was with a guy I loved and wanted to marry. Looking back, I'm really glad we didn't end up together. I am glad I waited that long and that he meant something to me. I'm also glad I didn't wait for marriage because I think I would have felt a certain pressure to marry the wrong man, just from the physical desire.

that "take one for the team" is really bothering me, and people wonder why we say men suck sometimes!!!

I'm 29, and haven't. The topic of virginity is a very very hard one for me to talk about with ppl I know. I'm a bit better with strangers, ( thus, being able to admit it here ) but it's still hard. I never wanted to wait till marriage, but did/do want to wait for someone special, and not just a one night sort of thing. I have some social hangups, and prob more hangups when it comes to sex. I don't know if I feel like I"m not worthy or what exactly. It's like, I know I am, but when it comes to close to anyone showing romantic feelings for me, I push them away before I can get hurt. But yeah, it's not something I talk about with the ppl I know, bc I have always thought it would of happened by now, and I feel like a social outcast when the topic comes up around my social circle.

At this point in time, I almost have the feeling that it just isn't gonna happen.

:hug:

I was 29 before I found someone that I had an interest in having sex with. It wasn't religion. It was just I felt different and my feeling towards opening up toward others was different. I dated guys in my 20s for up to a year and even though I liked them a lot, it just didn't feel right.

I think I did have to change myself a bit and feel that I was worthy of love. One thing you do have to try to work on is yourself, believe you are worth love and be able to open up yourself to someone.

Well I wouldn't argue that for most people it wouldn't happen, I just don't think its virtually impossible. I actually forgot but I do 'suspect' (high likelihood although I can't guarantee) someone else who was in her mid 30s. That was when she had her first boyfriend and she is kind of like me so I would be surprised if she did before then. And had nothing to do with religious reasons.

No regrets. We were both virgins, both 15, both totally in love and stayed together for a good bit of high school after. Remained friends after breakup, etc.

Allllll good. :) Also lost the big V "with protection." Was very well-informed and prepared so there were no mistakes, no regrets, but still young enough to not feel like I was the last one to do it. ;) Not too young to have really made the choice for myself.

i lost mine earlier this year to a guy who said he loved me (i am 17). 2 weeks later i found out it was a dare for the guy to have sex with me and that he only said he loved me so i would sleep with him. but in a weird way i dont regret it....i hate him so much but at least i will never let myself be tricked again.

i was 16 to a 28 year old whom i did not know more than a 10 minute conversation, the first time i was away from home to a friends house in college, the first time i ever had a drink (and was drunk for that matter) and the first i ever kissed a boy. all in the same night, all to the same man.

i have massive regrets.

I was 29 before I met someone that I felt comfortable enough with to see me totally naked. I married him and we'll be celebrating 15 years of marriage in December. :D I'm glad I waited.

Bit of a late bloomer here... I was 23 with a guy I was in love with and had been dating for about 3 months. We stayed together for 8 years (never married him though).

17...regret it? ...no. Wish it would have been with someone else though. that sounds like a regret it...but I don't. I wouldn't do it that way over again is what I mean.


...sometimes I lie and say I'm still a virgin. I'm most definitely not, but it can make for some fun times!

I'm in my mids 20s and still haven't yet!

I'll probably end up purchasing a male prostitute when I turn 30. :lol3:

I am sorry that that happened to you. :hug:

I was 16. I was in a car accident at 15 and cut my face, the guy i was on a date with that night, told me that he would only see me in dark places like his car of the movies. Thats a horrible thing to deal with at 15 with first guy you ever dated. I lost it to the very next guy I dated because I didnt think anyone else would every want me. We were together about a year but he was 20 and i found out he had sex with a 14yrold girl. At 20 i found myself unmarried and pregnant, my parents were great though. After that, and I got rid of the father(he turned abusive and was a thief and constantly lair) I started getting my life right with God, got together with my husband when my daughter was 1, we waited till we were married. I regret my choices and would give anything if my husband was my 1 and only. He isn't my first but he is the last. We have been ridiculously happy for almost 10yrs(10 yr anniversary is next month)

I lost mine when I was 14. I can't say I regret it. But if I had it to do over again I would. I would have waited. 14 wow it is so young. I never tell anyone I was that young. This all makes me think about locking my daughter up and throwing away the keys. I will be watching her like a hawk when she is 12:)

i lost mine the second day of college to a dude i met the day before. i don't really regret it... to me, virginity wasn't that big of a deal. and i didn't want to "lose" it to someone i actually cared about. i sort of wanted to practice, i guess.

and to really demonstrate how little it mattered to me, when i came back to my dorm room (to my shocked roommates i had met the day before as well) i said, "i just had sex with David." they said, "OMG were you totally a virgin??" i said, "huh. yeah. so i guess i just lost my virginity, eh?"

thus began a year of debauchery.