Headsets are great because you can listen to something you like but police in our town warned against them because a lot of the purse snatchers are looking out for headset wearers as they know they can sneak up on them. Not that we really have a lot of purse snatchers. Headsets also cut you off from pleasant interactions with people. Cellphone conversations do as well. If anyone so much as gives a glimmer of a smile at you say Hi. It's good manners and who doesn't like a nice smile from a stranger and a greeting?
I've never heard the term emo before. I thought you did a typo and they were calling you an emu which was even weirder.
There was a time when people would make negative comments about me but those days are done. I walk with my head up and with purpose. I'm not that sad little girl anymore who was afraid of my own shadow. I don't know how I changed but something snapped in me years back and I became my own female. The suggestions I have are keep your back straight and walk like you own the sidewalk. Look around you and see the sky and your surroundings. Your feet are not really that interesting - trust me. Keep a pleasant face and not a frightened one. Get a dog because if you have a dog you will always find people who are ready to talk nicely to you - unless you don't have your dog on a leash and don't pick up after it. If you can get out and see interesting things in the world around you it will help calm the negative voices we all get.
Who cares what a bunch of pimply teenagers with their pants hanging off their butts think about you anyways? It's not like any of them will ever be starring in a blockbuster film or be on a magazine cover. All that matters is you do what you want to do as long as you aren't hurting anyone.
To me, sadly... I'd rather take my chances than stop running with headphones. I just don't like running at all without them. Aside from a tiny street on my running route with a lot of old, broken down buildings that are being fixed up, it is residential with a lot of houses only 30 ft from the road and it's a cute area too.
I think it is more dangerous to wear headphones if you go running on a path or through the woods or in a relatively abandoned area or area with a lot of trees etc. I see no problem running with headphones in a more populated area.
Women are most vulnerable to rape and sexual assault within the 1.5 mile radius around their own home, because they're close to home they're usually on "auto pilot" and they think they're "safe" and their guard is down, which is why it's even more important to keep your eyes and ears open for predators, and to be aware of your surroundings. Especially if you're already shy and being harassed. Just be sure to do what you have to do to stay safe, ladies!
I can relate, I've social anxiety and I have done all through high school. I'm not going to say those boys are in the wrong, all I will say is they treat other people like that because they're as insecure as you. And by making you feel this way, they are succeeding.
Maybe I'm more hip than I realized; I know what an emo kid is. They're all over the place.
This post made me feel my age--I've never even heard the term emo. Maybe it's because I live in rural Arkansas? I'd rather think that than I'm "out of it."
I've never heard the term emo before. I thought you did a typo and they were calling you an emu which was even weirder.
Makelovenotwarcraft, I'm really sorry you had to deal with this. The self defense course idea is a great one, and the dog is as well. Not only will the dog help you meet good people, it will deter those whose intentions are to harass or harm you.
I went through a spell of agoraphobia when I was in my twenties for this very reason...I was tired of teenage boys mooing, oinking, laughing, pointing, mocking me for my weight. I would not leave the house for weeks unless the sun went down and I lived in constant anxiety of being tormented. Not fun, not healthy.
I've learned over the years that no one can make me feel inferior without my permission. When I projected self-confidence, either the comments stopped/diminished or I just didn't care enough anymore to notice them.
I recently read a book, Warriors Don't Cry, by Melba Patillo Beals, about her experiences being one of the Little Rock Nine (Central High School Arkansas integration). I wish I would have read this book in my twenties. Those kids were taunted, mocked, threatened every single day they attended Central. Melba would totally disarm them by smiling and saying "thank you" whenever she was abused. Her tormentors would become unsatisfied and she received pleasure, even joy, in not meeting their expectations. It is a really inspirational book and her message is still relevant. Don't allow those snots to dictate your happiness.
The simple fact is, is that if you are going to dress and look in a way that isn't the way everyone else does...people will look, or sometimes make comments. It isn't just teenagers...it's just that teens tend to make more comments/bully more. Often, it is because they are in groups. If they were by themselves, they probably wouldn't have done it so much.
I have ALWAYS dressed different. In the 80's they called it punk, in the 90's it was grunge/skater, and now it's "emo". Basically all of those styles have the same basic undertone...they just call it something different.
Unfortunately, the choice is either ignore people...or dress/act/do your hair in a way that won't attract attention. (It's unfortunate, I know...)
I honestly think I am the ONLY mom who goes to my kid's school in black t-shirts and Converse All Stars, with a tattoo across my chest. Well, let me clarify-I'm not the only parent LIKE that...but I'm the only one like that who volunteers to help during holiday parties and bake cupcakes. The rest of the moms who volunteer are all tan year round, and they wear khakis and drive SUV's. I might be categorized as being alternative...but they are categorized as being "soccer moms".
Ok, I have learned a new word, emo - I have never heard it before.
I agree with the suggestions to enroll into a self-defense class, not that I expect you to kick those teenagers' butts when they start harassing you again but it will give boost your self-esteem and confidence .... and that will show.
Also, the suggestion to get a dog is great - I would say get a BLACK dog. There are lots of people who are, consciously or subconsciously, afraid of black dogs. In my neighbourhood, there is a young girl (I think in her early twenties) who is short and thin - she may weigh 90 pounds soaking wet. She walks a HUGE black great dane. I bet the dog weighs more than she does.
The dog is absolutely gorgeous and as mellow as a kitty, but my neigbhours saw me talking to her and petting the dog and asked me if I was not afraid that the dog would bite me. (I really had to laugh). Black dogs command a lot of respect.
I hate boys - they are EVIL. Last month I was out on a walk by myself, it was probably 9pm. This car full of Arab men drive past me and yell, SL*T.
I did not know these guys at all....... I was so mad... I turned around and shot them the finger.
I used to get upset when teens made fun of me. But then I started looking at myself and realizing I'm not that bad of a person. I'm no movie star, I'm just a normal, short stack of SH** . Once I started carrying myself with my head held high and showing some self confidence, the comments from others really became less frequent, and when they did it just proved to me their lack of maturity!
So, take a good look at yourself! Are you who you'd like to be? I mean, am I as thin as I'd like to be ? NO, but who I am on the INSIDE is what makes me ME! and these punks can't *usually* get to me like this anymore. So, take a look at yourself, do you like you? Then who cares!
As for self defense, that would be a good thing for all of us to do. Me, I got my dog!
A pet is a big responsibility. It's not just something you buy to ward off attention. It has to be fed, groomed, cared for, and walked twice a day, whether you feel like it or not. So I would say, unless you're prepared to really take care of a dog, don't get one.
A martial arts class is helpful in that you'll learn confidence and physical skills. Depending on the kind of martial art, you'll also become quite fit. But the idea that then you can deck anyone that talks mean to you is of course not the right thing.
I have been known in the past to flip off people who made rude comments, but again, I really have to say don't do this. You never know who is high and has a gun.
Take a different route... dress differently... ignore them... keep doing what you're doing... read the book that AliceEep suggested. Hang in there!
I thought you meant "Elmo," and I wondered if it was some sort of Muppet reference, like if you were wearing fuzzy workout clothes or something.
I get yelled at, too, and it used to make me not walk. Sometimes I still have to take a swallow and get out and risk it, but every time it happens I remind myself that the problem is with THEM, people of such little character that they think it's OK to go around unprovoked, saying mean things to strangers.
I hate when people make comments, mostly guys do it. You would think they would be proud of us for doing something about our weight?. I really don't let it bother me anymore, I've gotten past it. I just hope those people know, KARMA is a beotch.
I hear you, Luvja, we get bullied because we are fat, and then bullied more when we are exercising and trying to fix it. Da**ed if you do, da**ed if you don't. But the truth is, if someone is pathetic enough to bully someone, it doesn't matter if you're overweight or not. Everyone has something that some loser can pick on.
The rest of the moms who volunteer are all tan year round, and they wear khakis and drive SUV's. 
I might be categorized as being alternative...but they are categorized as being "soccer moms". 
