If they dont' care -- I don't think it matters. By the time my wedding rolled around, I wouldn't have cared if they showed up in stripper outfits, as long as everyone quit bugging me and they all got along for the day
I agree - as long as it isn't the same dress, it's fine if it flatters both and they both want the color. It SHOULD, though, coordinate with the wedding party dresses (or at least not clash) because you'll be taking group photos.
Thank you for the replies thus far. My mother has had a heck of a time finding a dress for her daughters ( my sisters wedding ) and she finally found one today that she loved ( which is hard to do, trust me ) and it fit her nice, and is the perfect dress. She tells my sister that it is Navy, which is what her fiances mom plans on wearing. So, my sister is now up in arms about this, thinking that his mom will be upset. My mom called me to ask my opinion and I said it was fine, and it doesn't matter as long as both moms were comfortable in what they were wearing. Personally, I feel like if his mom is gonna get upset over something so trivial, she needs to find something to better her time with.
My understand of wedding etiquette is that the mother of the bride gets to pick her dress first anyway -- but don't quote me on that
From ourmarriage.com
Mother of the bride duties lists the following:
Choose your gown for the wedding day. Immediately tell the Mother of the Groom the colors and style so that she may begin looking for a complimentary gown. Send a swatch of material to the Mother of Groom if possible.
Second etiquette website --
It's customary for the mother of the bride to purchase her dress first. Her choice is meant to subtly dictate what the mother of the groom will wear. However, this approach can be a little old-fashioned, not to mention a little unrealistic. There's always some factor that make abiding by tradition a lost cause. Our advice: Just play it by ear, and try to be flexible. It's not a competition.
My mother-in-law actually called my mom asking her to let MIL know when my mom had picked out her dress, then she would go get hers.
Not to say these rules apply -- but I think they should make your mom feel good!! I hope no one gets upset over a detail like this, but if they do, don't let them ruin a beautiful day!!!
I wore the same color dress as DIL's mom. No biggie as long as both moms are OK with it. Most of the "rules" have gone out the window. My bosses wife wore black to her son's wedding. I remember when ...
Rules don't really apply anymore unless those involved are very traditional. My best friend's little sister wore white to my wedding (she asked first.) It didn't bother me at all. I wore ivory anyway...
I think your Mom should wear what she wants. I would suggest your sister mention it too her future MIL though before the wedding. Just so it's not a surprise. She'll probably be just fine with it.
My picture here is my mother-of-the-bride dress. What a time I had finding something within my price range to fit me!!! I was upset because the color was the same as the bridesmaids, but it was the only dress that I could find. So, I asked my daughter, the bride, and my other daughters what they thought. To them it was no big deal. They were just happy that I found a nice dress.
Btw, the wedding looked beautiful, and it was a wonderful day.
Actually, my mother has worn pretty much the same color as the other mother in all 3 weddings she's attended for her children so far. No one's complained, and it looks nice in pictures.
If I were the Mother of the bride, I would call the Mother of the groom and make sure, personally, that she didn't mind. It would show respect for her feelings and maybe avoid the situation where the Mothers in law only communicate to each other through the kids. Seems friendlier and less antagonistic.
If I were the Mother of the bride, I would call the Mother of the groom and make sure, personally, that she didn't mind. It would show respect for her feelings and maybe avoid the situation where the Mothers in law only communicate to each other through the kids. Seems friendlier and less antagonistic.
I agree with this. According to Emily Post and from what I've heard from people, it is the Mother Of The Bride who sets the tone for the mother's attire, but since the mother of the groom went ahead and got a dress, I think it would be more than appropriate for your mom to call her.
I think that the main issue, is that BOTH mothers wear dresses that are flattering, appropriate, and that compliment the wedding theme/colors. It honestly doesn't matter which mom picks out her dress first. The focus, anyhow, is on the dresses of the bride, and her bridesmaids. They are the ones in the spotlight.
My MIL, my mom, AND my stepmother all wore similar dresses/suits to our wedding, and they were all black. Our wedding was in October, with a Renaissance and autumn theme. The wedding colors were black and gold, with autumn themed flowers and decor. I suggested that they all wear black. They did, two with black blazers/skirt sets, and the other in a black panstuit. I made their corsages myself...they were autumn flowers like mums, with autumn leaves (in natural autumn tones of rust, gold, etc.) in them, and gold ribbons. They all looked gorgeous.
It looked really nice, because our wedding cake had autumn leaves (fake) and mums between each layer, and autumn leaves scattered on the tables, etc.
Question about mother of the bride dresses??
