[SugarFreeFatso]

I going through such a difficult time now that weight loss is really the LAST thing on my mind. This is an emotionally turbulent time.

How do you cope with the upheaval and trauma of being rejected, treated like you're a no-good loser and that you're just not good enough for someone that you unfortunately have deep "feelings" for? This rejection has just reinforced my own low self-esteem and feelings of worthlessness.

Please help.

[shelby897]

Those who love and care for you remind you that you are a worthy person -- worthy of respect, love, admiration for your wonderful qualities and atributes. I know it's difficult to believe the great things about yourself that others already know, when the person whom you care the most for at this point isn't reciprocating but this will pass, but now is the time to loudly tell yourself that all the negative things you've filled your head with just can't be true. Start telling yourself the positives, and I know there are many , tell yourself out loud, every day in front of the mirror and any time you head for food. Take a walk, sit in a park and watch the birds and squirrels, anything to relax, sooth and calm yourself. Food will not make your problems go away but it will definitely increase your anxiety and stress. Take control, take charge and decide what you want for you -- not who you need to make yourself whole!!

Good luck -- here for you

[Cheryl14]

Hi Sugar!

I'm sorry that you are feeling down! It was a good thing for you to come here to this site. There's a lpt of support here and people who can understand.

To answer your question, Shelby has mentioned some GREAT ideas, and I would like to add that if you haven't tried exercise as a picker-upper yet, PLEASE DO! Exercise actually causes your body to manufacture endorphins. Endorphins make you feel more positive so that you WANT to do more and see the good rather than the bad side of life.

Nobody likes to feel rejected, but maybe this rejection will allow you to be free to find someone that is truly for you.

Losing weight boosts self-esteem and makes a person feel lighter and fitter. Exercise will assist you on this, and soon you will wonder what you ever saw in the guy!!!

Also, this is DEFINITELY the time for me to ask you if you really want to be with someone who rejects you, treats you like you are a loser, and makes you feel like you aren't good enough! Sounds like someone to STEER CLEAR OF if you ask me! A person who treats someone like that is insecure and is dealing with self-esteem issues himself. It also sounds like you COULD BE looking at an abuser there.

Be glad that you got away from a situation that could prove to be not only uncomfortable, but quite possibly downright DANGEROUS!

Go do some of the affirmations that Shelby suggested RIGHT NOW!! Hugs to you!! IT WILL BE OK!

Cheryl

[catsnhorses]

sorry to hear of this situation... I am an emotional eater but that is one of things I am hoping to deal with, and I know that's not the answer so I don't recommend it.

one of the things I *have* been doing is actively seeking out positive people who don't have to drag others down to make themselves feel good. I have a lifelong problem with negativity but I am hoping their positive attitude will rub off on me. I am also decluttering from my life people who drag me down, it sounds mean but this is a self-preservation thing. And I'm trying to do it gently, not meanly, by excusing myself if they call and not returning their calls because voice mail and husbands are too unreliable for passing messages on... (ahem). It may sound harsh but I am guessing this person would have turned out to be one of the dragger-downers so it is better to have found that out sooner rather than later.

Like others have said - exercise or just a nice walk in a scenic area (park or neighbourhood with lots of gardeners LOL) is a great pick me up. Or watch afavourite funny movie (no popcorn allowed) or a luxurious bubble bath or do a favourite craft to keep your hands busy...

Good luck

[liz321]

I cry and talk and then I forge ahead...give yourself time and when you get the strengh....go one day at a time.

Liz