*sigh* Long marriages.
I'm having a bit of a drama at the moment. We visited my parents at the weekend. My Mum is very huggy kind of person. DF doesn't really like that but tolerates it (or so I thought). Anyways, we were faffing about over lunch and DF was getting wound up that there was so much fuss and so many choices and

and he wanted us to make lunch. So to calm him down Mum stood behind him and went to put her arms around his waist. He grabbed her wrists and flung them off him (she hadn't even touched him yet!). So Mum was v shocked and DF v p'd off since he "doesn't like to be touched!". I was mad at what he said, I can't remember quite what, but I didn't know he'd hurt mum. So I said he'd better apologise to her for being such a
Anyway, we got the dinner ready and Mum wouldn't come downstairs, so I went up and she's all upset that he's hurt her, and she's so shocked and it's a big mess. So I try and calm her down and explain that DF's parents aren't quite as huggy as she is, and I don't think he even really gets a hug from his Mum.

But she's still wound up that he was quite "violent" with her.
So I go downstairs and DF is having lunch, I tell him to apologise, so he goes upstairs and they both get upset and have a hug and sort it out.
Later on, Mum asks me if he's ever "been violent" with me. I told her I wouldn't still be there if he had.
So anyways, DF goes and talks to her again and I thought they'd made up. But DF is still feeling stupidly bad about it this morning, and is asking me to apologise again to mum. I had a doc's appointment this morning, so I rang Mum beforehand. She's still upset and keeps saying she can't remember when anyone was so rough/"violent" with her. So we kind of agree to put it behind us and move on. (She is a bit stressed out with their business at the moment, v busy time) So I rang DF to tell him that she doesn't think he's violent with me, but she's still a bit upset.
She just wishes that it hadn't happened, and that we can't go on getting upset and apologising. Invariably, DF usually gets p'd off whenever we go to their place - either because we stay out too late or we can't get out the house when he wants to.

We have no transport when we go there, we usually catch the train. They live out in the middle of no-where and there are 3 buses a day!
Now I'm not mad at DF, not as mad as I could be anyway. And I feel sad that I've introduced someone into my Mum's life who's hurt her and upset her. I've spent my whole life looking after her and cheering her up and trying to NOT have her hurting, and now it's my fault that DF's been an @rse and I'm torn in two.
I really don't think DF meant to hurt her, and he's very sorry. But I don't know.
confused