Good Afternoon All! - I just love imagining you running, you know you will one of these days! Silly? - Never! Girl that's Vision, Hope, Faith, B-e-l-i-e-v-i-n-g !!! I never thought I would even walk fast but I am - on the treadmill - almost ready to do a little jog!! I haven't gone when nobody else is there yet, but when I catch it just right I'm gonna go for it, just try it, just for one minute. That will be a victory for sure! (Well, unless I break it-OOPS!)
We will all be all ears waiting to hear your new weigh down wt. I am losing soo slowly but that isn't really the most important thing, as I am really gaining in my walk with the Lord! He is so awesome to seek me out to fellowship with Him. It is truly exciting to see we're getting priorities in order - seeing God going to His rightful place - on the throne of our hearts!
Blessed assurance - Jesus is Ours!!!
Thank you so much Elizbennet! I needed that so badly! I am feeling very sad and heavly burdend right now. Don't worry, I haven't blown it, or fallen off the wagon or thrown in the towel, it is just that, My Oldest Son Adam is in jail he wreaked my car. He took it last night and drove it up to his brothers house to work on it. He put it in a ditch last week and broke a fan blade tip. Well today they were on their way to Auto Zone to get parts when he hit the brakes on a curve and they failed and he ran the car into a utility pole and knocked down some wires. They fled the scene and a witness who saw the accident reported it and my car plates. Long story short Adam was arrested for driving while suspended and he was also on parole for drinking and driving charges. I talked to him before the police got there and again he threaten to kill himself, he swore it. Over the last two weeks he has been doing that. Please I need you to help me pray for Adam, he keeps threatening to take his own life. He feels he is hopeless. I have been praying and crying out to God all night. He has been very combative and took a huge chefs knife and put it to his throat and screamed he was going to kill himself 3x's. Later I walked into his room and he was sitting on his bed crying with a knife sitting by his side. I held him and told him everything is going to be alright. I love him so much. I know Jesus loves him more! There seems to be nothing I can do or say to convince him I love him and Jesus loves him. The devil is a liar!! I pray that Adam will open up his heart to Jesus. I pray Jesus gives him a Saul to Paul conversion or any thing he wants to do. I did try to talk him into letting me take him to the hospital for help, but he refuses, since he has no insurance.
He is in jail now. I just don't know how he is going to behave when he gets out. He is angry and sounded violent. He desperately needs a Saul to Paul conversion. I seem to be unable to reach him, but I serve a Mighty God who does know how and if this is part of His plan then so be it. I did call the Mentel Health Hospital and they are going to send someone in tomm. to have him assesed. He does have some issues with bi-polar disorder and ADD. He is supposed to be on medications for it but has not. My Son Daniel says my car is HIT! Meaning totaled! The devil has done everything in his power to get me to dive into food for comfort, but I AM TELLING YOU , I HAVE BEEN DELIVERED ! I AM FREE FROM THE SIN OF GLUTTONY! PRAISE GOD, PRAISE GOD. PRAISE GOD!!
I continue on my Lords Table course and I have been very blessed in and through it. Thank you so much for your kindness, love and prayers. Love in Christ, Gwyn
Hey Gywn, I read and just responded on another thread. You know you have our prayers, girl! Believe He will do what is best in His timing. Anger, disorders lostness - our God has a handle on it all and He know your boys and what to do for them. I am really sorry about your car. I know you probably are dependent on it - like all of us are on our "wheels". I'm not preaching or being up-i-dy, when I say that this didn't come as a surprise to God. He will work it out for the good, for His name sake because of you Gwyn, because you are calling on Him and believing Him to meet your needs.
I certainly will be praying.
I called the jail last night to be sure they put Adam on watch and they promised they would. I also called Park Center mental health emergency and talked to them and set it up with them to go to the lock up and assess Adam for in-patient care in the morning. I called early this morning about 5:00am to check on him and they told me that they had released him during the night on his own recommence! Well he went to court this morning and they told him he has to get a better job and pay more fines or go to jail for 2 years. So He just got dropped off here. He went into his room and there he sits. We are car less now and live in Woodburn which might as well be Timbuktu, Since it is so far from the city and there is certainly no city busses coming clear out here in the country. We are over 10 miles from anywhere! I just MUST> MUST>MUST> TRUST >JESUS IN ALL OF THIS! Well this is my update for now. Thank you for your prayers. In all this strife, termoil and trouble, I have stayed the course!!! I HAVE NOT FALLEN AND GOD HAS BEEN VERY GOOD TO ME AND FAITHFUL! ALL OF THIS HAS A PURPOSE. I believe that He will work all things together for the GOOD! Because I love Him and I am called according to His purpose! LOVE In Christ, Gwyn
Jesus is your strength, your very life. He will be with you through this. He has unlimited resources and will help you in this time of trouble.
Your church home - have you talked with friends from church? Do ya'll have a good support group in your church?
Thank you so much Elizbennet! Yes I have a good Church and I have all of you lovely friends and Sisters in Christ and a Brother or two, right here on 3 Fat Chicks, of which I am eternally greatful for! GUESS WHAT??? I went for my walk and I walked exactly 1/2 mile pushing my wheelchair. While Ceaser(no not a bunny rabbit, but my new dog) pulled lightly on his leash and Hubby pushed my oxygen tank!!!! I am soooooooooooooooooo HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY!!!! of course I had to stop and rest a few times, but we made it, to the GLORY OF GOD!He is the one who encouraged me to do it. I felt Him urging me to try and I kept thinking, no way! I can't do that! I weigh, way to much to go that far! But then He (Jesus) would show me the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth! What is that you may ask? The TRUTH was... I didn't want to do it! So when I got to my turning point to head back home and complete my 2/10's of a mile. I just kept plodding on, at 1st I felt, oh no, this is going to be too far! I'll never make it! It's going to be too hard for me.But He would encourage me with HIS WORD! IE: I can do all things through Christ. It was wonderful, soon before I knew it I was almost home! Adam and I talked for a while this eveing, I tried to encourage him to cry out to the Lord from whom all blessing flow. I believe in my heart that he will. And God will save him and help him. I love you all! Thanks for reading my thread and posts. Please feel free to comment anytime. I love company. God Bless You! Love in Christ, Gwyn
Good. I am please that you have a good support group - in person, so to speak.
You know, our puppy dogs are great encourager's to us. I just love dogs!
Well, my boys are now gone for the week to middle school camp whrere they are camp leaders. They worked really hard getting ready for this week. Everyone, please pray the Lord will work in a mighty way with these 145 young people who are learning about our Jesus this week.
Love you sooo sooo much Elizbennet! Hey tonight is the night!!!! My husband and I are beginning a great adventure. We are responding to the National Call! 40 Days for 40 Years! Check it out! www.fastandpray.com to view the video and or read the Call to Our Nation. At the end we hope to be able to go to the rally in Nashville, Tn on 07-07-2007! I want to be there when it happens and until then we will be faithful in our vows to the Lord. Hey Elizbennet we will also pray for your boys this week as we do this. I also have other reasons to do it too. I have 4 Children who despreatly need to see the Light! Who need to be saved, santified and filled with the Spirit of God! My husband also has 4 Children who are in the same boat going the WRONG WAY! We plan to CRY OUT TO GOD FOR THEM! We plan to grab hold of the horns of the alter and hold so tightly that our fingers are imprinted! We will seek the Face of the Almighty GOD on behalf of our unsaved loved ones, on behalf of our unsaved peoples of our nation, the United States of America! NOW IS THE TIME FOR ACTION! We pass whining and complaining, and murmuring emails about how something needs to be done, but are we willing to DO SOMETHING OURSELVES? are we willing to TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR WHAT WE CAN DO? Remember what President John Kennedy said in his great speech? "Ask not what your country can do for you, But Ask What YOU can do for your Country!" NOW IS THE TIME FOR AMERICA TO PULL TOGETHER, HUMBLE OURSELVES AND CRY OUT TO GOD IN ONE VOICE IN AGREEMENT! Let ACTS OF SERVICE TURN THE TIDE IN THE NAME OF JESUS! New International Version (NIV)
Isaiah 58
True Fasting
1 "Shout it aloud, do not hold back.
Raise your voice like a trumpet.
Declare to my people their rebellion
and to the house of Jacob their sins. 2 For day after day they seek me out;
they seem eager to know my ways,
as if they were a nation that does what is right
and has not forsaken the commands of its God.
They ask me for just decisions
and seem eager for God to come near them. 3 'Why have we fasted,' they say,
'and you have not seen it?
Why have we humbled ourselves,
and you have not noticed?'
"Yet on the day of your fasting, you do as you please
and exploit all your workers. 4 Your fasting ends in quarreling and strife,
and in striking each other with wicked fists.
You cannot fast as you do today
and expect your voice to be heard on high. 5 Is this the kind of fast I have chosen,
only a day for a man to humble himself?
Is it only for bowing one's head like a reed
and for lying on sackcloth and ashes?
Is that what you call a fast,
a day acceptable to the LORD ? 6 "Is not this the kind of fasting I have chosen:
to loose the chains of injustice
and untie the cords of the yoke,
to set the oppressed free
and break every yoke? 7 Is it not to share your food with the hungry
and to provide the poor wanderer with shelter—
when you see the naked, to clothe him,
and not to turn away from your own flesh and blood? 8 Then your light will break forth like the dawn,
and your healing will quickly appear;
then your righteousness [a] will go before you,
and the glory of the LORD will be your rear guard. 9 Then you will call, and the LORD will answer;
you will cry for help, and he will say: Here am I.
"If you do away with the yoke of oppression,
with the pointing finger and malicious talk, 10 and if you spend yourselves in behalf of the hungry
and satisfy the needs of the oppressed,
then your light will rise in the darkness,
and your night will become like the noonday. 11 The LORD will guide you always;
he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land
and will strengthen your frame.
You will be like a well-watered garden,
like a spring whose waters never fail. 12 Your people will rebuild the ancient ruins
and will raise up the age-old foundations;
you will be called Repairer of Broken Walls,
Restorer of Streets with Dwellings. 13 "If you keep your feet from breaking the Sabbath
and from doing as you please on my holy day,
if you call the Sabbath a delight
and the LORD's holy day honorable,
and if you honor it by not going your own way
and not doing as you please or speaking idle words, 14 then you will find your joy in the LORD,
and I will cause you to ride on the heights of the land
and to feast on the inheritance of your father Jacob."
The mouth of the LORD has spoken. www.fastandpray.com 40 Days for 40 Years
I Love you in Christ my brother and sister,
Gwyn L. Ditmars
Hello! Just wanted to check in! I have been doing good and staying the course! I spent Memorial Day in my Mom's pool with my 2 grandchildren and my 2 daughters in law. We had a wonderful day! I ate in great moderation and felt real, real good about that. I know my brother had never seen me do that before, not at a family celebration anyway! So to God Be the Glory! I am on the 40 days for 40 years now and I am doing great so far. No it is not fun, but I feel it is very nessesary, very needful. I even walked last night with Cesar and that was went well too. I will check in later to keep this thread posted. Hope you are doing well too. Oh I still haven't got to go to the hospital to get weighed yet but I will get there soon. I hope. Love in Christ, your friend, Gwyn
Gwyn, for the 40 days are you just continuing with TLT food plan and prayer? Will they be sending you material/or by way of the internet?
I have Adam lifted in prayer.
Tonight my baby boy will be driving home. Please remember him for safe travel (Aaron).
Tomorrow he and my dear hubby will be leaving for the Ukraine for a week. They will be on a mission trip with our church. Going to multiple churches teaching block party evangelism. They just love every minute of it!. They will return on the 9th. of June.
Also tomorrow my older son (Chris) will be driving the big supply truck back from camp (prayers for that too, please.)
You know Gwyn a prophet is known last by family/home town. Be encouraged that you are staying the course and they will begin to see and desire what you have - that which is giving you peace, joy, discipline, and love.
Oh my dear Elizbennet, Thank you for your prayers, love and concern. For the 40 days for 40 years I am continuing the Lords Table Online Course but My husband and I are drinking only water. We are putting our hearts in His hands. I am doing fine, I keep a very close watch on my blood sugars and they have been normal. I felt called to do this and so did Robert. check it out at www.fastandpray.com You must be so proud of your Husband and Sons. WOW going to the UK! WOW that is my dream to one day go and serve the Lord on a mission feild. ALthough the U.S.A. is needing missionary's sent to her. It is sad indeed. I just about fell over when I read of your Son driving "the Big Truck!" because that is what I did before my illness. AND it was a CONFIRMATION that I was to share my story with all who read my thread. So here GOES>>> RIP TIDE! I wanted to share my story about the time I almost drowned in a rip tide out off Mission Beach in San Deigo, California when I was driving Semi Trucks for a living before I became Ill. So here it is Hope you like it! I was in San Diego, Ca in 2002 I will never forget it. I took a 3 day layover while driving for North American Van Lines, while in San Diego. So that I could rest and enjoy the beach. My husband was with me. I was the driver and he was the lumper. We had dropped the trailer at the terminal and bobtailed down to Mission Beach. It was October and we practically had the whole beach to ourselves. The water was cold, I would guess around 62 degrees. But that made no never mind to me! I am a fish!!! I have always loved to be in water. My husband and I played in the waves for about an hour. We were having such a wonderful time. He got chilly and tried to get me to go back to the truck with him in to warm up. But I was no were near ready to get out yet. It was my 1st time in the pacific ocean and I intended to make the most of it! So I watched him stroll up to the truck that was sitting in the Mission Beach parking lot. I continued to play in the heavy rolling waves. Then suddenly it seemed as if I were in a battle with the waves. They were getting much stronger and they would knock me down and I would get up to face the next to see if I could stand and keep my footing. Soon an all too familiar deep dark sadness came over me. I began to think of my children and all of the heart ache and pain they had to suffer, because I choose to stay with their Father who I was married to for 16 years. He was a very cruel and abusive man. He caused such pain and devastation in our hearts and lives. I felt my children's pain so intensely and I began to think of what the divorce had put them through. I walked away from him and left him everything. Because I did not want to fight with him anymore. Anyway, there I was in the waves, waves of salt water and waves of violent inner pain. I began to wrestle with the waves like I was actually wrestling with God, with life, with depression, with agony. My tears mingled in with ocean water as they fell from my face. I felt I could not go on living any longer in this pain. I could not bare to see my children all using drugs and alcohol heavily to try and medicate their own pain and suffering. I felt since I had abandoned God when I divorced my children's father, believing that since God hates divorce, then surly he hated and abandoned me too. I felt unloved by God and Man. My Children were angry at me, my family was angry at me, my friends were unhappy with my decision. I truly felt smothered in a deep heavy black blanket of anguish and despair. I felt that life as it was, just wasn't worth living any longer. Not that I would take me own life, but kept wishing someone or something would. As I stood there wrestling with the waves crying my heart out to God. I noticed I had gotten quite a distance from the shore and I had moved side ways, far from where I had began. When suddenly I felt the most enormous vacuum of water pulling me out farther and farther! I knew I was in a rip tide and that they were very dangerous. I was extremely physically exhausted because of all the hours spent wrestling with the waves, crying, and staying in cold water. I instantly knew in my heart that I was face to face with death! I dug my toes deep into the sand as the massive waves poured back out to sea pulling me with it. I realized that unless God intervened I was doomed to die. I now had my chance, I could choose to call upon God and choose life, or let go and let death take me out of this world. I am hear today to tell you this true story because God Love's Gwyn! And I chose life. I did want to live and I did call on God. I felt something like a huge hand on my back. Every time the rip tide waters would force over my body as it washed through the trench back out to sea, the hand (as I call it) would hold me firm in place. The waters were rushing so fast and hard that I thought it would tear my clothing off me. It was the most powerful force I have ever physically encountered in all my life. As the water would rush out it would completely cover my head, I had no strength left, and I was shivering uncontrollably. I held me breath until the water would roll back in and I would take a few steps and dig my toes down in the sand and let the hand keep me safe from being completely swept out to sea. Little by little I was getting closer and closer to the beach. I finally reached a point where my head was above water but I could still feel the hand on my back. Finally I was safe! Just as I reached that point a jeep with life guards were jumping out into the surf with red life buoys. Too late. I was already safe. Every step I made took an enormous amount of energy! I thought I would never, ever make it all the way up to the truck. My legs were as weak and shaky as a newborn baby. A life guard was very angry at me for even being any where near that part of the beach. He said, don't you know that this is where the rip tide is and that 2 surfers had lost their lives in it last year? I assured them that I would not be doing any more swimming here for a while. I began to drag my legs and feet towards my truck. The heavy feelings of depression and sadness were still washing over my mind and spirit. Even though I KNEW it had been GOD who saved me from death. I slowly climbed back into my truck and took a deep sigh of relief. I caught my face in my side mirror. My skin had blue and purple blotches all over it. My lips were blue! I examined my arms and legs they were the same shades of blue and purples. I began to cry again, Robert was sawing zzzzzzzzz's. He didn't even wake when I boarded the truck. I picked up my Bible and opened it. My eye's fell on this Word and I have never been the same since. Neither have I ever been troubled by the dark depressions. Nor have I ever questioned GOD's Love and forgivness for me. 1 But now, this is what the LORD says—
he who created you, O Jacob,
he who formed you, O Israel: "Fear not, for I have redeemed you;
I have summoned you by name; you are mine. 2 When you pass through the waters,
I will be with you;
and when you pass through the rivers,
they will not sweep over you.
When you walk through the fire,
you will not be burned;
the flames will not set you ablaze. 3 For I am the LORD, your God,
the Holy One of Israel, your Savior;
I give Egypt for your ransom,
Cush [a] and Seba in your stead. (instantly I could see Jesus hanging on the cross!) 4 Since you are precious and honored in my sight,
and because I love you,
I will give men in exchange for you,
and people in exchange for your life. (again I could see Jesus hanging on the cross!)
5 Do not be afraid, for I am with you;
I will bring your children from the east
and gather you from the west. 6 I will say to the north, 'Give them up!'
and to the south, 'Do not hold them back.'
Bring my sons from afar
and my daughters from the ends of the earth- 7 everyone who is called by my name,
whom I created for my glory,
whom I formed and made." 8 Lead out those who have eyes but are blind,
who have ears but are deaf. (I knew right then that God was calling me to do his work and plan and purpose!)
9 All the nations gather together
and the peoples assemble.
Which of them foretold this
and proclaimed to us the former things?
Let them bring in their witnesses to prove they were right,
so that others may hear and say, "It is true." 10 "You are my witnesses," declares the LORD,
"and my servant whom I have chosen,
so that you may know and believe me
and understand that I am he.
Before me no god was formed,
nor will there be one after me. 11 I, even I, am the LORD,
and apart from me there is no savior. 12 I have revealed and saved and proclaimed—
I, and not some foreign god among you.
You are my witnesses," declares the LORD, "that I am God.13 Yes, and from ancient days I am he.
No one can deliver out of my hand.
When I act, who can reverse it?" And then these Words jumped off the pages and I read...I am the LORD, your Holy One,
Israel's Creator, your King."
16 This is what the LORD says—
he who made a way through the sea,
a path through the mighty waters, 17 who drew out the chariots and horses,
the army and reinforcements together,
and they lay there, never to rise again,
extinguished, snuffed out like a wick: 18 "Forget the former things;
do not dwell on the past.19 See, I am doing a new thing!
Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?
I am making a way in the desert
and streams in the wasteland. Oh how I felt the presence of The Lord God Almighty sweep over my body, soul and spirit! I knew that, I knew, that I knew he was speaking directly to me from his Holy Word. He filled me with hope that my lost, suffering, drug addicted Children would be saved. He filled me with a knowing that I was forgiven and that He dearly loved me unconditionally. And that nothing had ever changed that. I was his and he was mine all along. It was not God who moved away from me, it was I who moved away from God. I am close to God and I am never going away from him again. I went back there a couple of weeks after my experience and talked to a life guard, He told me that a rip tide is very much like a river within the floor of the ocean. It is a deep trench that water pours back into as it swiftly flows back out to sea. He said that I am lucky to be alive. I know I am blessed to be alive. Luck had nothing to do with it. God had everything to do with it. My dear friend, listen to me, I am speaking Gods truth to you! He and he alone can heal you every where you hurt!!!!
Thanks for the prayers - My younger son got home around 1:30 a.m. safe and tired. This morning I got him and hubby to the airport and they are off for the week. Now Chris is driving back from camp as I write.
I got myself a movie today - A Night at the Museum (something like that). Hope it's a good one! I have child care at church tonight so that will be fun!
Bye, bye ladies!
Gwyn, Friend, You ARE On the Mission Field right Now! As you share this story and your notes which are so full of encouragement, and God's Truth, and Joy every single person who reads them will be touched with God. Yes we are so blessed that He would be mindful of us, that He would have a care for us - but He does, Praise God, Praise Jesus Christ, Praise the Holy Spirit Who now resides in His children.
And Hope, the Hope of Christ that those we love most and those we don't even know can come to Him just as we have - because He first comes to us!
What a plan. What a God. What other god would come to his people with love grace, humbleness, and full of grace. No other god. There is only One God Almighty. Praise His precious Name!
Thank You for sharing His love, power and acceptance of man.
My daughter Sheila took me to the hospital to get weighed yesterday! I have lost a total of 65 pounds!!!! Praise The Lord with me! It is wonderful, the freedom that Christ had led me into! I have said it before and I will say it again if you have a very little weight loss struggle or a huge on like me, check out http://www.settingcaptivesfree.com/lords_table/ it is a free online biblical course and WHO THE SON SET"S FREE Is FREE INDEED! We are still very much with out a car and I cried because yesterday was the 3rd Sunday in a row that Robert and I have missed! I love going to Church and it hurts not being able to go. But God knows and He has a plan. We must trust Him and wait on Him! Also if you have not already please check out the National Fast and Prayer for our Country! it is at www.fastandpray.com 40 days for 40 years Robert and I are doing it and all is going very well with it. I feel it is bringing us closer in our hearts to Jesus and to each other too. I am going back 46 years because I have lamented for years that I was born on January 1st 1962 the year they took prayer out of the public schools. In my heart I believe that was the BEGINNING OF THE REAL DOWN FALL OF THE U.S.A!It makes my eye's well up in tears every time I think of it. I think it made God cry too! I think Israel made Him cry when they rejected Him as there King and wanted Him to appoint a King of flesh over them. I think it is just like that! I feel we humans have made God cry enough! I can think of countless times in the Bible that I am sure God cried when He lamented over our rebellious and stubborn sinful hearts and attitudes. I know I have made Him shed tears too! It is time for mankind to shed tears! Tears of heart felt true repentance just like you were talking about! And I have been and I know you are too as well as many others who are doing the Fasting and prayer for 40 days for 40 years. Except I am doing for 46 years! Starting from the day our government took prayer out of our schools! Love In Christ Jesus Our Lord, Gwyn L. Ditmars
Don't worry, I haven't blown it,
or fallen off the wagon
or thrown in the towel
, it is just that,
he swore it.
Over the last two weeks he has been doing that. Please I need you to help me pray for Adam, he keeps threatening to take his own life. He feels he is hopeless.
out to God all night. He has been very combative and took a huge chefs knife and put it to his throat and screamed he was going to kill himself 3x's. Later I walked into his room and he was sitting on his bed crying
liar!! I pray that Adam will open up his heart to Jesus. I pray Jesus gives him a Saul to Paul conversion or any thing he wants to do. I did try to talk him into letting me take him to the hospital for help, but he refuses, since he has no insurance. 
who does know how and if this is part of His plan then so be it. I did call the Mentel Health Hospital and they are going to send someone in tomm. to have him assesed. He does have some issues with bi-polar disorder and ADD. He is supposed to be on medications for it but has not. My Son Daniel says my car is HIT! Meaning totaled!
has done everything in his power to get me to dive into food for comfort, but I AM TELLING YOU , I HAVE BEEN DELIVERED ! I AM FREE FROM THE SIN OF GLUTTONY! PRAISE GOD, PRAISE GOD. PRAISE GOD!!
I have stayed the course!!!
GUESS WHAT???
While Ceaser
(no not a bunny rabbit, but my new dog) pulled lightly on his leash and Hubby pushed my oxygen tank!!!!
HAPPY
at 1st I felt, oh no, this is going to be too far!
, soon before I knew it I was almost home!
Thanks for reading my thread and posts. Please feel free to comment anytime. I love company.
40 Days for 40 Years!
complaining,
murmuring
emails about how something needs to be done, but are we willing to DO SOMETHING OURSELVES?
Let ACTS OF SERVICE TURN THE TIDE IN THE NAME OF JESUS!
We had a wonderful day! I ate in great moderation and felt real, real good about that.
celebration anyway! So to God Be the Glory! I am on the 40 days for 40 years now and I am doing great so far. No it is not fun, but I feel it is very nessesary, very needful.
yet but I will get there soon. I hope.
My husband was with me. I was the driver and he was the lumper. We had dropped the trailer at the terminal and bobtailed down to Mission Beach. It was October and we practically had the whole beach to ourselves.
The water was cold,
I would guess around 62 degrees. But that made no never mind to me!
and tried to get me to go back to the truck with him in to warm up. But I was no were near ready to get out yet. It was my 1st time in the pacific
in the heavy rolling waves. Then suddenly it seemed as if I were in a battle
with the waves. They were getting much stronger and they would knock me down and I would get up to face the next to see if I could stand and keep my footing. Soon an all too familiar deep dark sadness
because I choose to stay with their Father who I was married to for 16 years. He was a very cruel and abusive man.
I dug my toes deep into the sand as the massive waves poured back out to sea pulling me with it. I realized that unless God intervened I was doomed to die. I now had my chance, I could choose to call upon God and choose life, or let go and let death take me out of this world.