OH MY GAWD!!!

I think there's a tribe of Workout Barbies out there somewhere.

At one gym I went to there were 2 guys, one obviously coaching the other in lifting- except they'd do like 4 reps and stand around posing for 5 minutes, then do another exercise once or twice, then flirt with some girls....

The best I think was the guy who'd come in nearly every day, change into shorts and his regular t-shirt, with black socks and street shoes and then get on an exercise bike and pedal very slowly and watch an hour of the evening news - never broke a sweat once in the 2+ years I watched him. Didn't lose any weight either!

I don't know how people read on cardio machines and still move fast enough to do any good. I love listening to music, and sometimes an audiobook, but that's too much to concentrate on at times (depends on the story).

I used to work at a gym and i feel down the stairs (concrete) once and landed on my butt and hit my back against them. it was peak time and there were ppl all over the stair well (its not a very big stairwell).

working at the gym ive seem some odd sights...
- the guy who after he had a shower walked out with no shoes and just his towel around his waist (peak time and with not a care in the world)
- women who wear skirts to the gym, sorry for all of you who do it but it still puzzles me
- this one barbie who walks on the tredmill on the highest setting with her fake boobs bouncing up and down (with the full face of make-up and straight hair
- the young school girls who walk around the gym floor following their boyfriends (or the guys they want to be their boyfriends) and then come down to reception and giggle and laugh about their great workouts exept they might have lifted a weight once and tried to use the tredmill but started running for 5 mins, then they started to sweat so they hopped off
- women who wear their long hair out to do cardio....i would be soooo hot (temperature wise) if i did that
- people who would have a large juice after their workouts (and before sometimes) then would complain that they werent getting the results they wanted and would want to quit the gym

they are not really funny but more pet peeves

anyway my 2 cents

Kat

HAHAHA So funny!!! I have not stories, but excuses i have used to slack off in the past on trainers and physiotherapists...(I was on a 6 hour a day program so I needed a break every once and a while) maybe on a bad day you can use them


Physio/trainer:"C'mon pick up the pace girl!!! What's the problem?"

Me:

"I can't move! I lost too much blood shaving my legs this morning...."


"I have swass!!! (sweaty bum) or swack (sweaty back) and I feel gross....don't come any closer, I forgot to shower or wear deoderant."

"I can't do anything involving any type of bending, my pants are too big and that wierd guy over there keeps staring at my bum crack."


There are a many more but I forget them, I was in training/physio for a loooong time so I have too many stories to remember them all. If I think of more I'll add them.

OH OH I remembered a funny story!!!!

Well I got some free personal trainer sessions when I signed up for my gym and I took advantage of them, anyway, I was working in a core strength room just me and the trainer and the guy lets out a silent but deadly. It was so bad it filled the room within seconds and I was having a hard time breathing and the breathing thing was only made worse by me pretending I didn't notice anything.

I remember praying no one else would walk into the room and think I did it....I mean I own up to my flatulence and sometimes even the flatulence of others if I'm feeling silly, but I was not about to take the fall for that one...

no one came into the room by the way *phew*

I think it was the protein shakes that did it to him.....

My BIL is one of those guys who lets out a big grunt/yell, he is a powerlifter (he's won several trophies, too bad he was the only one in his weight class anyway I asked him about it he said it gives him the edge to get the weights up.

I am afraid of most gyms because my first experience at a gym:
My sister and I went with my BIL to his gym (the only one in town) to work out on the treadmills everyone in there men and women all had the same amount of huge mucsles (all powerlifters) and looked at puny sister and I like we were in the wrong place.

I want to join a gym now, there are more gyms in the area, plus a curves.

There is this one guy who always gets on the elliptical and hides a trashy celebrity magazine (I think its an InTouch) behind a copy of Business Week.

Oh, we have a woman - well, really a 20ish girl - who works out hard, lifts heavy, is really in good shape, but it's obvious she's trained with/by guys: she grunts/yells as loud or louder than they do! You can hear her all over the gym - a large downstairs and two loft-type areas upstairs!

That is hysterical!

Pat, we have a screamer too. It can sound a bit ... ummm ... racy sometimes!

i just thought another one involving me...

my trainer usually gets me to do "wierd" stuff on stability balls, rollers etc that involves concentration (which i dont have a lot of sometimes) and balance (reasonably okay). Anyway i am often toppiling over when i have to put one leg on ball and do a lunge or something.

One time i was doing dips on the stability ball (v.hard) and i lost a little bit of concentration and fell on my butt and we were near a wall so when i lost contact with the ball it went flying into the wall then came back and hit me in the head!!

Another time we were doing push-ups on an ab roller (a bit like a SB but smaller and like longer and skinnier and i slipped on one side and the roller came up and hit me in the face then i fell onto it head first.... it was peak time and we were in an area that the PT's train their clients and because i worked there at the time everyone knew who i was so everybody started laughing at me....i couldnt do anything but laugh as well!!

Needless to say my training sessions are more laughing sessions sometimes!!!!

I saw a woman KNITTING on the treadmill once. It was the strangest sight!

I don't go to the gym, but I do exercise at home, but here is my story. I work at a large retailer and this lady always comes in the store in her work out attire and she is always looking and buying my cellulite cream that you rub on your butt, thighs, tummy ect..... It is too funny, guess the gym isn't working for her so she thinks an $11 bottle of cream is going to make her skinny. We also had this lady in her 60's who was not in shape at all but who liked to where those shiny stretch pants with a thong/swimsuit type thing over them and her boobs were alway hanging out. So you got a eyefull when she was facing you and also got another eyefull when she turned around to bend over her cart full of stuff. You couldn't look at here without wanting to crack up, she also wore headbands.
We also had a lady who is about 85 who would wear full leather outfits, pant and all!!! (not gym related but funny)

bellakat -- Laughing is a great exercise!!

I thought of one this morning, I was telling my hubby about her. This hippyish looking lady has looong gray hair tied in a bun, very loose cotton pants and top, nothing really wrong with that I guess, but the clincher is that she wears no bra!! Ewww....

We have a woman who sings along with her CD player - but only half-sings every 3rd-4th word, really breathily.