Have you ever been made fun of on a bicycle? And if so, what height and weight were you?
I absolutely LOVE to bike. I biked constantly until I got fat. I didn't ride from 2006 until last summer, when I took a bike tour of Berlin, which I LOVED! I had no problem with endurance at all, I guess because it was a quality bike. And people were probably insulting me in German, but I'll never know
I desperately want to get a bike, and I'm saving $5 per pound lost and frantically selling my used books, CDs, etc. so I can get this baby (which is what I rode in Berlin): http://www.rei.com/product/798558
What I want to know is at what weight I can ride without too much threat of having frat boys yell "Hey, fatass" out their pickup truck windows. I am not the kind of confident, strong girl who can ignore that. It destroys me. So as silly and unwise as it is, I have to wait until I'm relatively "safe" from the meanies.
Any advice from big girls on bikes?
Last edited by ParadiseFalls; 03-27-2010 at 08:54 PM.
My advice is to play "fat bottom girls" by queen as you are riding your bike. Just do it!!
I tried riding a regular bike but couldn't overcome my own fears so now I ride a trike. It is amazing how much positive feedback I've gotten from both, the trike more than the bike but really, bike people like other bike people.
nelie, did you ride when you were at or close to your start weight, too? Or just when you had lost a lot?
I wish I could just overcome the fear. I'm actually great on the bike, with balance and coordination, so if I wasn't so scared of what people would think, it could be great exercise for me.
MikoMarcia, the bike is a great one! I normally would never spend so much on one, but I've ridden it and it's so awesome to ride. Really comfy and sturdy.
sunflowergirl68 Unfortunately it's illegal in Florida to ride with headphones, and my town is huge on biking so they enforce the bike laws really heavily. I know I should just ignore them, but for now I can't
Last edited by ParadiseFalls; 03-27-2010 at 09:49 PM.
I understand about not being able to ignore people, but honestly, do you want them to have any affect on your life? Think about it like that.... if you get upset, they win. That's why they're saying things... because they're such losers that they have to make someone exercising feel bad. I know you don't feel like you can't ignore them but if you love riding your bike, you shouldn't let ANYONE interfere with that! I know you can do it.
You should not worry about what people may say to you because with a townie no one will be looking at your weight, because your bike will catch their attention. I have a blue one and I love it. The townies are easier to drive than regular ones. You may know that stupid people may say things no matter if we are walking or in a bike, so focus in what you enjoy and block yourself from what idiots may say.
You're never safe from other people's stupid. You're just not. You can't MAKE people behave with intelligence, dignity and honor, but if you have intelligence, dignity and honor you really do see that what they're hurling is completely ludicrous. They aren't hurling poisoned knives, they're hurling stinky pieces of cheese, annoying but ultimately harmless (unless you have an irrational fear of stinky cheese).
If someone came up to you and ridicules you for being a spy or a vampire (something you are clearly not) or for being blonde or brunette (something you are, but a trait entirely pointless as an insult), you'd laugh - knowing the person had some majorly loose screws in the noggin.
I've had insults hurled at me for being fat, for as long as I can remember. It really doesn't hurt anymore, unless it's someone in my life, who really should know better - then I don't really just get hurt, I get even (if they know which of my buttons to push, I also know which buttons of theirs to push back).
It really did help to realize how pitiful a person's life has to be, in order to try to make a stranger miserable. In fact, I've actually used that as retort, as in "wow, your life must be really sad and empty, if trying to try to make a stranger miserable, makes you feel better. You should really talk to some one, you've got issues (Rolling my eyes to make sure they realize just how crazy they must be).
This of course doesn't work with shout outs from windows (it works good in a Walmart parking lot though).
My answer to hurled insults (like mooing noises) from idiots in cars (if they move slow enough to hear) is to shout "I'm fat, wow you're a genius for figuring that out, aren't you?"
Or to the imfamous "You're fat," a simple "No ****," works pretty well, or even "Yeah, so What?"
When you talk back or even make eye contact, it shrinks these little buggers to nothing - it's why they shout from cars - no possibility of eye contact and no fear of retaliation.
What I think is really funny (and it's really only happened obviously once or twice) is when a guy is trying to impress his friends by ridiculing me, and my reply made his friends laugh at the would-be-bigshot saying something to the effect of "Wow, she BURNED you, dude!"
To some guys it's a game, it's notat all personal, and they even play it with friends. The person with the biggest, most effective insult WINS. Stupid game. They're like monkeys throwing rocks (or more accurately, their own poo).
I LOVE swimming, and at times it was the stereotypical fat girls nightmare for me. The walk to the water always felt like a deathmarch (but I loved the water so much, nothing would have kept me away). I mastered the fear just by doing. Eventually I realized that no one important to me would laugh or make fun, and most of the time no one did laugh. My fear of comments made the imagined harassment more painful than the real stuff ever did. I really did learn to think "wow was that really the best they could come up with?" Then I started SAYING it and looking them in the eye, and seeing them wilt made me realize just how pitiful those guys are. You really can't be hurt by someone you see as stupid, crazy, and socially weak. You have to see them as stronger than you, for their harassment to hurt.
I'm not underestimating how hard it is to develop a thick skin. I've developed mine over decades, and it still can be an issue once in a while. When I bought a bicycle a few years ago (somewhere between my current weight and 370 lbs), I didn't think fear of ridicule wasn't even on my radar. I mean, if I can stand up to pool bullies, when I'm in a bathing suit, surely bicycling wasn't going to be a problem. Fear of getting physically hurt was my only conscious fear, when we bought the bikes.
Yeah, I was wrong. At first it was only the logistics of relearning bike riding that occupied my thoughts. I was too busy concentrating on my balance to worry about what anyone else thought. I did have to get a larger bike seat (the first ride was extremely physically painful), but once I was comfortable riding the bike, I started to be afraid of how I looked. We lived in a very isolated neighborhood, so passing cars really wasn't much of a problem - but neighbors outside in their yards, were. They'd smile and wave, and I'd wave back (but inside felt like they were laughing AT me, or at least thinking seeing my big backside on a "normal" bike was the strangest and funniest thing they'd ever seen).
Even a "nice" response like a smile and wave, made me paranoid. And I had to consciously decide to lighten up. I probably AM a funny sight. There's a guy in town much bigger than me who rides a bike through busy traffic and in the center of town (I am not that brave, and probably never will be). On one hand, I admire him for it, and on the other, even I think he does make an unusual and even comical impression. It's not a sight you see every day.
When I decided it was ok to look silly, I started really smiling at my neighbors when I drove by, and their smiles seemed more genuine too. I started feeling that they were cheering me on, not laughing at the freak show.
I don't know which if either interpretation was more "correct." Maybe they really did think I was an idiot, or thought that when I got home from my bike ride I probably ate an entire chocolate cake. I know it's cliche, but it really doesn't matter what anyone else thinks.
I have an active imagination, and using it can help or hurt me. So when a stranger does say something hurtful, I try to imagine that they do and always will live in their mother's basement, with no job (or some lame dead-end, humiliating job), with only an imaginary girlfriend.....
Most of the time it works, and what's even scarier is that I suspect I'm often closer to the truth than not.