New collage: a victorian boy, growing up. (As usual, click on image for a larger version.)

I would like to participate in this group, though I am newly returned to this forum, and I don't 'know' anyone here. I struggle with depression and anxiety, and would love to have a place to talk about that...and other things...with people who can relate. That said, I know it's sometimes 'weird' for someone new to join in, so I will put this much out there, wait a bit for input, and see what y'all think about newbies. If it's better to participate other places on the forum first, for example, just let me know. I'll likely check back tonight. :)

catinhat, :welcome: ! and hello, of course you are welcome here :) it might feel weird to open up to total strangers or you can view it as extremely freeing.

Our Kathleen named this the Ups and Downs support thread because we do want our friends here to visit whether you are having good times or bad.

you can tell us as little or as much as you want, as long as it helps you.

You can read back a little to find out about the individuals here or just pick it up as you go :)

I can go from feeling pretty bad to pretty good really quickly, or it can happen slowly. Sometimes I can rouse myself by forcing myself to do something when all I want to do is sleep, sometimes not. I am thankful that I haven't had suicidal thoughts in years, though in the winter I really don't look forward to anything except coming home from work, eating, watch a movie, then bed. but once Spring comes, I'm a different person.

Holly, yes my Mom's service was pretty close, it was only about a 15 minute drive.

I have 2 brothers and 2 sisters. We were all gathered around Mom's bed as they took off her ventilator. It was so emotional, we were all crying. Mom hung on for close to 3 hours before she took her last breath. I never left her side. I stroked her forehead non-stop and talked to her. I'm not sure if she heard any of us talking to her or not? She was extraordinarily weak and on pain and anxiety meds. We all made it clear to the Dr that we wanted mom comfortable as she was going through the process of passing. It was so important to me and my siblings that she was not in pain and that she was not scared.

Looking back, I don't know how I made it through that night. It was so incredibly painful.

I'm so glad you posted. I miss you when you don't, Holly.

catinhat, welcome to the thread. It's so nice to have you here. :)


Hi everyone, I wanted to pop in and say hi. I'm really tired tonight. I'll try to post again tomorrow. Have a great night.

Thank you, Lisaluvshearts and VermontMom, for your welcome! I appreciate it, and I will just start by saying hello, and some general stuff. I am married 25 years this summer, and turning 50 this summer. I have a 10 year old daughter, and the three of us live on a little hobby farm in a semi-rural area. We have a couple dogs, a cat, a small flock of chickens, a few bunnies, but things have gotten busy and I don't have the time for the bunnies that I used to, so I'm looking for homes for them. I work part time from home as an admin/personal assistant for a psychotherapist - something I started about 4 months ago. I like gardening and cooking, and I like being home and being outdoors. I crochet some, read a lot and do some arts and crafts. So, that gives you a little bit of an idea of 'me'. :)

We had a big blizzard Wednesday, and spent this morning digging out so I could get to town and do a bunny program at the library. It has been a long day and I'm tired, plus I'm not quite sure what else to say/share, so I'll just leave that for now.

VermontMom, I can relate to what you said about how sometimes, the process of going from feeling good to feeling bad is slow, sometimes quicker. I have had a rough few months, and while I'm not in a terrible place, I'm not feeling good either. I am hopeful that I can turn it around soon.

Lisaluvshearts, I am sorry to hear of your loss and what you went through with saying goodbye. It must have been so hard, and yet, I would imagine being with your mom is something that you'd never regret. I think that, even when someone can't acknowledge, they know about the love. :)

Welcome!
 

catinhat: Welcome to the group! Of course you can join us. Thank you for sharing a bit about yourself. As Holly (Vermont Mom) said, please feel free to share as much or as little as you want. We are here to support you in any way that we can. Best wishes to you in your weight loss journey and in your battle with depression. So happy you posted! :)

Lisa
 

Lisa: Keeping you in my prayers! The night your mom died must have been so difficult. :cry: Yet, I am glad that you were able to be by her side through her final hours. I'm sure she knew you were there. You are a very loving daughter! ❤ Sending you big hugs! :hug:

I survived my surgery!!!
 

Thank you to those of you who kept me in your thoughts and prayers on Tuesday! My surgery was 10 hours long, but my doctor seems to think everything went well. The longest part was that he had to literally sew lymph nodes to veins in 7 incisions along my left arm to try to address the lymphedema. It was also my final reconstruction surgery after breast cancer last year (for those of you who may not have known). My recovery is going extremely well so far..... thank God! Not too much pain at all at this point. Hope it continues to go well. Just wanted to post and let you all know that I survived! :)

Kathleen - so good to hear from you and that the surgery went well!! and that it's over!! :D and that you feel good enough to come here :) keep on with the fantastic upbeat attitude :cool:

Lisa - oh my gosh..that must have been a LONG night..it is so wonderful that your Mom's children were all there to say good bye. I don't remember if I said so here, but when my mom died almost 4 years ago, I was lucky enough to be with her to the end also. Exactly as you described, I also stroked my Mom's forehead and told her she was loved. You were with your Mom when you entered this world...you were with her when she left this world. Much love to you Lisa :hug:

catinhat thanks for telling us some about you :) Ugh to a blizzard! Your little farm sounds fabulous!! when you say dug out, do you plow yourself?

Hi to Fi and EasySpirit and coop :)

I mostly wasted my two days off, I hate that. I did clean up my desk area but that was it.

I should just erase my ticker becaue I haven't been on the scale in a year and I am sure it is way off.

oh well I hope we all have as good a day as possible :cool:

We dug out with shovels. Our neighbor across the road has a tractor, but I don't feel comfortable asking him when he's not out doing his own driveway or something. He didn't get drifts this time, so I didn't ask for help. Our driveway is about 100' long, but only about 1/3 was drifted, thankfully. Still, my shoulders are really sore.

Ibelieveinme2, that is a long surgery! I am glad you are feeling good so far!

I am floundering this week. My daughter is home for spring break, which I love, but my routines are all off. My boss took the week off too and said I should feel free to catch up on things, but much of what needs catching up on is not anything I can do....it's stuff he has to dictate to me. My husband has been sleeping a lot too, so there has not been much family-together time (he works afternoon shift), and I'm bummed. Still, Daughter and I have been doing things together, and just spending our time in the same room makes us happy...I don't mean to complain.

I have, however, been pretty emotional lately. I suspect menopause is beginning, but I am not sure. For today, I'm going to make a to-do list, and work at freeing up my weekend. :)

Kathleen, I was very pleasantly surprised and relieved to find you had posted. I wish you a speedy recovery.

Holly, there is nothing wrong with wasting those two days - you probably needed the rest, especially with that miserable job winding down for the year; you must be exhausted, frazzled and worn.

I am not getting near my scale - too afraid I will toss it in the trash assuming it must be defective! I can tell by my jeans that I have gained weight - why doesn't that stop me from attacking the Easter candy??? I am having a terrible time with chocolate and ice cream.

Fi, I think I need to do what you did with the cookies. HOW did you stop? As I type this, I am thinking I could eat a few Russell Stover eggs right now and replace them tomorrow ! OOOHHHH! I am disgusted with myself.

Lisa, like you and Holly, I was with my mother when she passed away. But, I think she was already gone; when they turned off the respirator, she did not even take a breath....nothing but a little release of air.
You will always feel comfort in knowing you were with her.

Hello to everyone else.

After Easter, there is a long stretch without 'candy holidays'. I am glad. I sub in the library district some, and there is always lots of chocolate for the staff, and I'm terrible about having 'just one' (two, five, ugh).

One of my weight loss 'goals' is to take better care of myself, and be able to somehow stop with a bit of something, or a single piece, instead of feeling like there are these foods I can't get enough of. I know I feel better when I eat more wholesome foods, so I want to figure a way to actually do that most of the time. I've been thinking I should list different categories of foods, either by food group or by taste/sensation, that I like, and then working to incorporate more of those wholesome things into my choices. Right now, I eat like a teenager whose parents are out of town for the weekend....it's not good. I'm under some stress lately, and I think that triggers my poor choices, but the stress isn't likely to go away any time soon, so I have to find other ways to cope that don't add even more stress. It's discouraging, especially since I'm doing this to myself. :/

New Member?
 

Hello all! I hope you have "room" for another in your wonderful group. Battled depression/anxiety forever, but worst times were postpartum after second child and before and after brain tumor (6 years ago - all good up there!).

Doing well now, trying to pull myself together and get back to a "normal" weight. Hoping that brings my health - physically and mentally - back into a good place. It will take a long time to lose this weight.

Did someone say something about menopause? yeah got that too.....

Hi, Purplecow - I am new to this group as well. :) And I'm the one that mentioned menopause - woo hoo?

I hope everyone has a lovely day. I had goals to get some things done yesterday to 'free up my weekend'. I ended up subbing at the library yesterday, which was fine, but I didn't get as much done at home. Today, I'm subbing at a different library, and I was, honestly, looking forward to the travel time, because it would be quiet time for me, alone. Now, the family wants to tag along and 'do stuff in town' while I'm at work. My daughter is convinced today is Easter and we forgot to celebrate it (for future reference, when this is an older posting, this is the Saturday before Easter), and my dog threw up on the rug first thing this morning. Good times.

It's a pretty, snowy day. I am going outside to enjoy that a big, load firewood into the empty baskets, and feed my chickens and bunnies. Have a good day, everyone! <3

Lisa, I'm so sory to hear the circumstances of your mother's passing. I do hope it brings you comfort over time to have been there and had a chance to say goodbye. With my own mum, I received a phonecall out the blue afterwards, and I wish so much I could have had some time beforehand. I know what you mean about those moments your brain thinks "I'll just call..." they grow further apart over time.

Kathleen, I'm glad you came safely through your surgery and are feeling spritely enough to post so soon. I hope you're recovering well and not too sore.

Catinhat - welcome to the forum, it's nice to see a fellow bunny owner, even if you are having to let them go. I hope you have luck finding them a new home.

Welcome purplecow - good luck with your weight loss!

Hi to everyone else :) hope you have a good Easter!

Hello friends, Happy Easter (if that's your thing :D ) I reported to work at 11 a.m. and man was it busy til 3 pm! Alot of people went to the Sunrise Service on the mountain this morning, then skied, then they all came to the store :p for sandwiches and everything else. However, the Rat B@stard Boss let us close early :carrot: My husband also has to work today; and our two boys are with others so it is a quiet Easter for us.

Years ago when I was a pastry chef in retail, Easter was one of my dreaded holidays, SO busy with orders, then when I got home, had to clean up and dash to some relative's house for dinner, when all I wanted to do was sleep. Very glad I don't do that anymore.

Lisa, oh gosh I know that feeling, "Oh i've got to tell Mom this, she'd like it" and then the reality washes over you. You are doing great. I hope you had a good time at church today :)

Hi Kathleen I hope you are getting more recuperated each day! are you in much discomfort??

EasySpirit, Hi and here is some will power dust :dust: to help against the chocolate and ice cream!

This made me laugh out loud :D and it applies to me to!!! no restrictions. I hope we can come to our senses soon. Oh and I congratulate you for all your shoveling!! that is a workout and just doing it is a testament to some level of fitness. and sorry to hear about the dog throwing up on the carpet, never fun.

Hi coop, I guess I didn't know you learned of your mom's passing by a phone call??? that is bad. sad :(

Hello to Fi :) Is Spring arriving for you in the DC area yet?

a big :welcome: to purplecow! Yikes about the brain tumor, glad to hear that is in the past.

So I really like this young girl I found on youtube, Jessica Smith, she is YOUNG but it seems her workouts are geared towards older folks!! like she says "as we age we tend to shuffle our feet if our leg muscles are weak". SHE IS LIKE 28 YEARS OLD :devil: I picture her as the cheery, chirpy Activites Director of a nursing home :) but damn I'd rather listen to her than Jillian Michaels!

Wishing everyone a good week! I'm starting out feeling a bit overwhelmed. It's the 2nd week of spring break and this week, my boss is back in town and wants to work. I work from home, and the subject matter is not always appropriate for my daughter to hear - I'm an admin. assistant to a psychotherapist. It feels like there will be a lot of plate spinning this week, and I'm not feeling great about it.

However, it's a sunny day, and I told him I'm running him off at noon, so she and I will have the afternoon together, which I'm really looking forward to! What's going on for you this week?

Thanks for the welcome!

Lisa: I've been thinking about you.

Catinhat: do you feel like trying to lose weight during menopause is like beating your head against the wall and wondering why your head hurts? Sometimes I think I should just chill and give myself a break. I'm on Ideal Protein and suffering from asparagus intoxication. Veggies are my life now. Without some support from the scale I'm afraid I can't do this. :?:

Thanks all!

Purple, I have felt that way aobut trying to lose weight since I was twelve....but that's a long, sad mess of a story.

Today was alright. I've been talking to my boss about something I think we should try, and he's willing to go for it. I take dictation of all his case notes for clients, and he's going to use a little digital recorder right after each session to 'put down' what happened in session. I will be able to listen to them on headphones, which means my kiddo won't be hearing bits of discussion this summer when she's home on vacation. So, I've got from now until end of May to make this work really well for my boss - woo hoo! It's a small victory.

My joints are sore today. I didn't exercise, in part because of that. I did, however, pick up a book at the library that is about yoga and using it for pain in joints. I think I have to start very gentle and with nibbles of exercise, and build my strength over time. In the past few years, I feel like I've lost a lot of strength and flexibility, and I want those back. There are some projects I'd like to tackle around our home, but I am so low energy these days. It's time for me to step up and get stronger and healthier and get 'me' back. I've been through some fairly deep depression (at least for me) in that same time frame, and I really want to climb out of it.

To end on a positive, I am going to bed half an hour early to get some rest and not just be on the computer. I hope everyone has a good night and sweet dreams!

Catinhat - if you are new to yoga and using it to help joint pain, I would recommend you do a few classes with an instructor initially, just to have someone there to correct your posture and give you tips. Just a slight curve in the spine or angle in the hip can be the difference between a good stretch and a bad one.

Holly - my mum passed before I joined the forum, so you won't really know the circumstances. I don't so much mind the way the news broke but I wish we had prior warning - mum had been poorly, but the dr told her she had a virus and needed to sleep it off and then she died of heart failure. It took us all by surprise, as she was only 62.

Lisa, I hope you are getting on ok, and hope your job search is showing up a couple of possibilities.

Thanks, Coop27! I'll keep that in mind. There are classes in my area, and even some free introductory ones at the library. :)

Wishing everyone a wonderful day! :)

It is so difficult to stay on track when there are all these holidays and gatherings with so much chocolate and desserts. They are my weakness! So the library has a lot of sweets? On the days you know you are subbing, have you tried packing a lunch with lots of healthy snack choices? I find that bringing my own healthy food, that I know I want to snack on, helps me steer clear of the chocolates. My favorite is to snack of berries - they are so sweet and I don't even miss the other options!

Wow! Lots to catch up on here!!! It is great to log on and see so many posts, though! 😊 My recovery is going so well that I almost can't believe it. No pain at all now. In fact, I drove my daughter (on Spring Break) and I to lunch today. It was a nearby restaurant and I was very careful, but I never thought I'd be able to do "normal" things again so quickly. If you can believe it, I am right now waiting as my son is being assessed for intensive outpatient therapy at the same psychiatric hospital I was in (inpatient for a month against my will last summer). Yes, I have the heebie jeebies just sitting in the hospital waiting room. Don't want them to take me and lock me in again (even though we aren't even here for me this time). This was recommended by his psychiatrist who we all trust. My son is not really on board, but there has been a ton of tension in our home and he has done a lot of stupid things (whether he admits it or not). He has a girlfriend now and thinks everything is solved because he is "happy" now. Uggh! If this girl breaks up with him, he will be crushed and sink back down into a deep depression again. I just know it. 😟 His moods are so fragile right now. His psychiatrist actually recommended the intensive outpatient therapy to add some structure in his day as well as to treat him for anxiety and depression and some substance abuse. Long stories that I don't really want to expand upon for his privacy. Anyway, I am waiting on pins and needles to see how his assessment goes! 😯

Welcome to purple cow and healthylivingalways!!! I'd post some cute welcome emojis but I am typing quickly from my phone. So happy you have joined us! 😊 I hope you will keep posting. It's great to see catinhat posting so often and sharing so much. I will try to get back ASAP but wanted to touch base while I had a chance! Where did Fi and guacamole and librarian and bookmark go? Hello to Lisa, Holly, EasySpirit, Coop, & everyone else! 😊

And by the way, I had a terrific follow-up doctor appointment yesterday! There is already some evidence that the lymphevenous bypass on my left arm might be working!!! This would be HUGE if it works! Could mean that I get rid of my lymphedema sleeve part if not all of the time. What a huge relief that would be!!! All incisions are closed completely and healing nicely and I got the okay to begin range of motion exercises and even already got out of the surgical "straight jacket" bras! I am one happy camper..... except for the situation with my son (which is constant high tension right now). I will choose to focus on the positive and be thankful that my recovery is going so well! 😊

IBelieveInMe2, I'm glad for your happy news with regard to your recovery. I work for a psychotherapist, and a lot of clients want to stop therapy when things are going well, even though those things aren't really a long-term management of depression or anxiety - I think it's a common thread. :) I hope your son's eval went well and that he benefits from the program there.

We went to the nature center and hiked, then toured the visitor's center. It was really nice. We stopped at Goodwill on the way home and picked up a few items that will be useful to us. It was a really nice afternoon. :)

Hi all! Kathleen I am so worried for your son, I HOPE he finds the treatment helpful!!

but I am so happy to hear how well your recuperation is going! :carrot: that is fantastic and you are so upbeat, that is sure to help you also :)

catinhat, sounds like you had a nice day the other day, good to hear! and I hope you can sell your boss on the idea that would be helpful.

Hi to Lisa (take it day by day), coop, Fi, purplecow, EasySpirit! and :welcome: to healthylivingalways!

Well I guess all I needed was some nice weather; I remember last week I wasted my two days off; today, I was outside for almost 5 hours straight :eek: doing very vigorous work; cutting down trees with a bow saw (yeah, small ones, but they were LONG like 20 ft) and dragging them further into the woods; clearing a large area of shrubby stupid things, using lopping shears to cut them down to the ground and hurling them back into the woods; intensive raking of a couple years' worth of wet yucky leaves...but it looks so much better and expands our garden, and is gonna give us more sun on that ground. Emptied the big compost bin into the ground ... relocated the platform the compost and recycling bins are on..wow :D

It is UNHEARD of that the weather is permitting this! usually at this time in Vermont, we are still deeply locked in snow and ice. It is soooo great that I can do this now, before the vegetation takes hold and it seems insurmountable.

I took 2 advils in anticipation, lol, but I have been working out about 4 x's a week now so I hope I'm not too sore tomorrow, I will let you know. Still eating too much but at least I'm exercising.

Only 13 more days until I'm done with the Rat B@stard :dance:

I know from experience that I tend to waste a lot of time when I'm struggling w/depression. Lately, I am wasting a lot of time - some on the computer, some just in my head - procrastinating over some thing I have to do that would take 10 minutes, except I put it off for a day...or three. The longer this goes on, the further behind I get with various tasks, and the more anxiety builds. It's an ugly little cycle, and I need to figure out how to break it. If you have thoughts, I'd love to hear them, but I just wanted to put it out there in part to acknowledge where I'm at these days. Thanks.

On that note, I'm going to get off *here* and go do things for 15 minutes. Then, I think I'll head for bed. :)

I do this too. I try to develop a pragmatic approach to it - I will have to do it at some point, it might as well be today. But I'm easily distracted...

I don't have any strategy to offer, for me, there are some tasks that I just seem to have blinders on about...like the upstairs closet, it can be a mess for months and I just don't care..then one day I see it, and have the ambition to tackle it?

for things like bills, I just make myself write out a check and pay them as quick as I can, because I hate the anxiety of wondering if a payment will be late if I procrastinate.

Hey I am not sore today :carrot: :carrot:

today I chose a Jessica Smith video, it was mostly cardio, 25 minutes, then about 6 minutes of floor abs.

Had a local landscaper come by, and for just $100, he did in about 2 hours what it would have taken me weeks to accomplish! woohoo alot more space for planting.

am enjoying this mild (mid 50's to almost 60) weather because it ain't gonna last, Sunday the high will be in the 20's! :eek:

have a good afternoon/evening everyone :)

It's silly, maybe, but just by talking about it here, I've been better about getting off my backside and doing things. I have a friend stopping by tomorrow afternoon. The house was ok, but I switched out some decor I've been meaning to take care of for a while, tidied, vacuumed...it looks better, and I will feel less overwhelmed by what I want to get done tomorrow before she arrives.

Today has been stressful. My boss had some bad news which would potentially affect my employment with him. Hubby reminds me that we'd be fine if I didn't have this job, and he is right....but it's stressful, not knowing what's going to happen. It's also out of my sphere of influence, at least, much of it, so this is a good time to remember boundaries. I've been thinking that a re-read of Henry Cloud's book, Boundaries, would be a good idea. Guess this is my sign.

Meanwhile, my weight has come down a little. That makes me happy...mainly, that it's not increasing (it had been before I came here).

LisaLuvsHearts, I'm sending you virtual hugs and good thoughts. I have not experienced what you have, but I wish you well. I think it is a process, and I admire you for looking for the positive.

VermontMom, what will you be planting? I'm not sure if you're landscaping or gardening...or some combination. I love to garden, so I'm excited to find others who do too. I had a tiny garden last year, but I scrounged some fencing from next to my henhouse and pretty much quadrupled my garden space. It still needs to be dug, but just seeing it fenced has me happy! (We have to fence because of the deer).

IBelieveInMe2, I'm glad you're having good results from your procedure, and I hope that continues! You sound upbeat and like you're feeling good, and that makes me feel happy for you!

HealthyLivingAlways, your strategies are great....much better than my 'eat the chocolate while it's free and nobody's looking' strategy. That one just doesn't work at all! ;)

Oh, yesterday I had a bunch of holds come in at the library and one of them is a yoga dvd - Easy Yoga for Easing Pain. I am going to try it tonight! It's from a series called Yoga For the Rest of Us....I think it will be easier for me to see/understand than the book I got from the library. I'll let y'all know!

Argggh!!!
 

I have written 2 very long posts with personals and lost both of them, but I will try this one more time. I don't know how to create a document in Word and then transfer it to here, so I will just try again.

Lisa: It is so great to see you posting more lately. I know your heart is broken, though, and I am still keeping you in my prayers. 💜 So are you not working anywhere now? The reason I am asking is that it occurred to me that maybe not working was a blessing in disguise for you so that you could spend more time with your mom in her final days. Please know that we are here for you and that you don't always have to put on a strong front for us if you are hurting. Take the time you need to grieve... and share your feelings here if you want to. We just want your heart to feel happy again! 💜

Holly: Wow, you are one bada$$ strong woman to conquer all of that grueling yard work! I am majorly impressed! So happy to hear that your weather has been nice enough to work out in your yard. Good for you for taking advantage of it. I am SO super excited for you to be finished working for your big meanie winter boss!!! :devil: Can't wait for you to be able to ride to work on your motorcycle this summer! :scooter: Great job on the consistent workouts! Keep up the great work! :)

catinhat, Coop, & Lisa: I am right there with all of you on procrastinating. It is one of my worst and most frustrating vices. :( For me, it is often my perfectionism which holds me back. If I think I can't get the task done perfectly, then why even try? I know it is totally self-defeating and far from actually being perfect, but that is the biggest root of the issue for me. It becomes a vicious cycle, too. I try not to beat up on myself too much for it, though, because I know it only makes matters worse. Let's make an effort to all work on NOT procrastinating so much and we can share our big and small victories here. We can encourage each other to "just do it!" :cheer2:

EasySpirit: Where are you? I am sending you big hugs :hug: and :dust: as you battle your chocolate cravings. Please feel free to share your "down" times with us, too. I can tell that you are a strong person, but we are here to support you in any way that we can. :)

Fi: I sure hope that intense and constant pain is not preventing you from posting right now. Hope all is well and that maybe you've been able to get out and drive again! Please post when you feel up to it and let us know how you are.

Waving hello to everyone else! :wave: Hope things are going well with everyone! Don't forget to post about both your UPS & DOWNS when you can. It is always nice to hear from everyone! :)

Catinhat
 

catinhat: I am so happy to hear that you have accomplished more and lost a little weight since you started posting here. Perhaps writing about things and venting a little is helping. Keep it up! I enjoy reading your posts. :) I hope everything will work out okay for you with your job. It is difficult to be in limbo and not know where things stand. I love hearing about your farm life and especially about your animals. I am a SERIOUS animal lover!!! Hope you were able to do the yoga dvd you got from the library! Let us know how it goes.

Such great energy here!!

Yes, I also hope that Fi is not experiencing terrible pain. We are thinking of you!

warning, next is all garden stuff :D

catinhat, we don't grow much for edibles, just the thrill of being able to do it :D but last year I had great luck with one Boston Marrow Squash, one plant yielded a 30 pound monster and a couple smaller ones. I processed them into pies for a fundraiser; and froze the remaining flesh-innards (always weird for me to call a vegetable's innards 'flesh')

We love sunflowers and want to do more of them..we do a small herb garden in containers for the deck..I usually have one large patch of nastirsiums (sp?) on the lawn; I tend my two large mint patches well because I pick stems/leaves and bring them to work , to use daily as dessert platter garnish (same with the nastirusiums) And I want to try to make tea from dried mint leaves. Tried Gem Marigolds last year, and in late summer, they took off and gave me hundreds of tiny little gorgeous blooms that I also used as platter decorations, they looked like confetti and made me so happy.

Oh yeah we do some tomatoes, don't have a ton of luck with regular size but do have good luck with cherry tomato types, and they make it so I eat tomatoes every day, good for me :D

And I'm so excited about my 3 rhubarb plants!! bought them from a local hardware store's garden center in June; they were in tiny 3" pots. Well the location I picked must have been great, it was on the edge of lawn where 20+ years of leaves had been accumulated; so very rich soil and I added MooDoo (bag of dried cow manure) to the planting holes. Well those plants TOOK OFF and got huge, but I read NOT to pick ANY leaves the first year!! So hard not to. So this year I can start to carefully pick a few leaves each week. I will bring them to work and use for desserts. There is also rhubarb at where I work, but I wanted my own too.

So I want to add another couple rhubarb plants; and I had saved seeds from my Monster Squash, and we planted them about a month ago,, under lights, and those seedlings are about 6" high now!

Oh and pansies in containers on the deck, I also pick them daily in summer to bring to work as garnishes.

Our season is so short, I think that is why I embrace the growing so much. And I don't really mind cutting the grass, or using the weedwhacker, because it looks so nice afterwards.

Procrastination ...I have been putting a few things off...I need to make another eye doctor appt, I had one last August, needed new prescription for contacts, but somehow, my communication with the doctor did not work and I can not see that great...it is not that my vision changed suddenly, as soon as I got the new prescription I could tell it was not correct for me, but didn't want to think my $$$ were wasted! so tried to make them work. Difficult to see at night ( think that's an aging thing anyway) but when I can't see that great down the road during the day, that is not good (speed limit sign says 555? I dont' think so ) SO I have to go through the whole process again.

other thing, I received a recall notice on a minor thing on my car, but need to make an appt. for that.

OK now that I spoke of those things, I've been procrastinating on, they aren't that bad are they :devil:

I am very glad I have been able to do some type of movement/exercise almost every day, i also feel accountablle to come here and tell of it, so that is good.

Only TEN MORE DAYS til I'm done with the winter job :carrot: I can deal with that.

have a good day!!

VermontMom, your post made me feel so happy! First, before I forget, what is the 'winter job'??

My own boss, who is still young and a little on the self-important side sometimes, bless his heart, is possibly getting fired next week. He doesn't see it that way, but he has less experience than I do...and my husband thinks that the writing is on the wall too. I have mixed feelings about this. This job is one I started in December, and it's been somewhat overwhelming all along, but the added income has been a blessing. I've told myself 'that's why it's called 'work''. I guess we'll just see what happens. Hubby and I can manage without it financially, and it would free me up if it goes away....but I don't hate it, nor do I have bad feelings toward my boss. This is just one of those things where he isn't seeing the bigger picture, and he's not in a position to say/do some things he's saying...and doing. Time will tell.

My garden used to be big, VermontMom, but then the deer came. There were a lot of wildfires in Colorado over the past decade, and a lot of displaced wildlife ended up in places it was not normally seen....so now, we have deer out on the open prairie. Since there is not a lot for them to browse (they don't eat grass, they are browsers), they really go after people's gardens out here.

My growing season is short too, and I have my best luck with smaller tomatoes too! (I love currant tomatoes, and I'm looking for seed right now for the variety I had before.) I have a fenced garden now, with a 'topper' to protect from deer (and hail). It's all DIY, and looks better once there are plants in it to distract from my fencing skills. I grow a lot of the same things you do. Potatoes do well here, so I grow 'fancier' ones, like blue ones and fingerling, and I grow a lot of lettuce, spinach, greens, kale, peas, etc. Green beans do well and I love love love them, so I grow enough for us to eat, plus some to can for winter. My garden last year was a little less than 8x12 - we called it the dog run garden. I took down some fencing near my hens (used to be a holding pen for whatever needed holding - turkeys, the dog, a bossy rooster, etc.) and this year, my garden is about 12x30. I'm super excited! It gets too cold here at night for tomatoes and peppers and such, but corn does OK, so I might put a small block of those in one corner - just big enough for pollination. My daughter loves birds and wants to be an ornithologist when she grows up, so I rai.se mammoth sunflowers for her, and we save the heads for the birds in winter. Pumpkins do well here, but take over, so I have a separate place I put them all by themselves, and I think I'll do that again this year. All around the perimeter, I grow herbs on the outside, because the deer/rabbits don't bother them. I've got lots of different things, some for pretty, some to cook with.

Oh goodness...can you tell I love my garden? ;)

Just FYI: It doesn't look like anyone started a new thread for April, so I will do that now. Please join us on the Ups & Downs April 2016 thread!