[usam]

Hello,
Well, let me introduce myself. I am a stay at home mom of two. My daughter is almost seven she is a Type 1 diabetic and celiac and my son is 4 1/2. The first of the year I decided I had to do something to make our lives better and decided to ask my father who lived in Greece to come over and help me open a take-out. He had been in the business for years and was now out of a job due to the recession. He enthusiastically came over and we started the procedure of finding a spot, menu, planning, ordering, buying for our new venture. Three months later my mother came and we were all excited about our new phase. One evening my husband and father went to take something to the shop and my father very suddenly passed away. I remember my husband calling me crying and screaming and having to go to the hospital to say goodbye. I know we never plan for these things but it hurts. He was a wonderful man.
I lost my appetite for food, for life, for everything. I gave myself a month to mourn and then get back into business. But I don't feel like I'm there.
I lost a lost of weight but now can't seem to stop eating. I'm stressed about the business cause he was my mentor and now I feel lost. I have no motivation. I feel like the worst mother cause I have nothing to offer my babies. I'm always in a bad mood. My husband makes my life miserable cause he has no clue how to handle me. I mean I can't focus even writting this post my mind is everywhere.
I don't know how to get past this. There is no right or wrong way to mourn but the hardest part is that my father passed away outside our shop and everytime I go there I cry.
I guess I'm asking for advice on how to get a grip. How to stop myself from eating constantly. How to focus on work and my kids and get back into life? How?

[TiffNeedsChange]

Have you considered getting gfrief counseling? Something like that can be very traumatic.
Something to help with overeating: when you find yourself "hungry" figure out if it is true hunger or emotional hunger and go from there. So sorry for your loss. *hugs*

[midwife]

I'm so sorry. I agree with grief counseling. You're not a terrible mother at all. Counseling, prayer or meditation, exercise...all of these may offer a bit of relief from your overwhelming feelings. I think most people would need counseling in your shoes. You have shown a lot of strength through this.

[Kitcherella]

I am so sorry to hear that. But I can find a silver lining. At least you got to see your dad and work together on a project before he passed away. Things like that are so special. He was there, not thousands of miles away. You can succeed and be proud of what you started together. Maybe you just need a bit more time. Turn to the people close to you to find strength.
Ta sillipitiria mou - My condolences

[usam]

Thanks so mych for the replies. I was indeed very lucky to get to spend quality time with my father before he passed away. I plan on making him proud and feel that he will be there with me every step of the way. I have my mother with me now and she is a very strong and special person I can rely on. I have to take it one day at a time and try not to get too wrapped up in the sadness and grief.

[EagleRiverDee]

I agree with the others that counseling would help. If money is a problem, look for low-cost or free counseling. If you're active in a church, ask there if they know of counseling that is available. Some churches have counselors on staff.

[freelancemomma]

Originally Posted by usam

There is no right or wrong way to mourn but the hardest part is that my father passed away outside our shop and everytime I go there I cry.

I'm wondering if it might help you to reframe that thought a little. When you go past the shop, perhaps you can remind yourself that this was your father's contribution to his loved ones' security and happiness, and that the best way to "reward" him is by continuing his work and making the shop a roaring success.

F.