[april99]

Hi,

I am new to this forum. Have been lurking here for a few weeks. I have had depression on & off for the last 21 years. Most of the time there was no one to talk to about it.
I was on antidepressants in the late 80's, but went off them after about 4 years. Through most of the 90's I was irritable, crabby, would cry a lot & was plain miserable. At the end of Nov. last year I got real depressed. The Dr. said it was Seasonal affective disorder. He put me on paxil, but changed it to effexor xr because of side effects. I did well on that until I tried to go off it. I went back to the Dr. & he put me back on the effexor xr. I realized after that I was having withdrawl effects, But I was so tired of feeling so miserable--crying, irritable & sad. I decided to stay on the effexor xr.

I am feeling better now, but I still have the odd day where I feel down--but not very often. This med has brought my blood pressure down to 120/70. I'm on medication for my blood pressure. Also I don't seem to have much of an appetite now. Have had a long standing weight problem that was getting worse--couldn't stick to any kind of diet. Am doing WW on my own at home since the end of May & have lost 8.4 lbs.

My Dr. said that women who have a weight problem for a long time are often depressed. I think that is part of the reason. Also I come from a large close knit family. DH & I live 2600 miles from them. I find that hard. We have 3 grown sons & 1 lives here & the other 2 live out of town.
I guess I am rambling. So I should stop for now.

[meg 1+2]

Hi April and Welcome,

Glad you decided to join us. We are a bunch of really nice gals, some of us a little "nutty"... oops, did I say that??? Anyway, we are here to support each other and to listen to WHATEVER, so don't feel you can't unload.

I too have 3 grown sons and one grown daughter. Don't you feel somehow, somewhere, WE got lost in the shuffle?? I am now trying to find myself and reclaim my life, although I must admit, I loved being a mother and I was my own worst enemy. I gave so much, and did so little for me. For a long time after they left, I felt so useless and so alone, but I soon realized that no one wanted to join my pity club and that I had to pick myself up and start taking care of me. This is a slow process but I am making progress.

This site has been very valuable to me, just reading and sharing has been very theraputic for me. Some of the ladies here will actually "slap" the sense back into you when you need it. So, I encourage you to come back and talk with us. We don't have any professional solutions (that we leave to the doctors) just some suggestions and shared experiences that might make you sit back and reassess things.

Again, Welcome and come visit with us.

Meg

[LindaT]

Hi April,

Glad you found these boards. I have found it to be a tremendous help when dealing with my depression. Most ladies that post here either are dealing with depression now ot have in the past.

I know what you mean about Effexor and the withdrawls.. wow. A few times, I remember missing a dose and the nausea and the dizziness were incredible.. even after only missing one dose. I was one of the first people on Effexor back in the mid 1990s; I believe it had been out on the market 3 months when I took it. It's funny, effexor had the opposite effect on my blood pressure.. it went up. During taking this drug was also when I gained a tremendous amount of weight. Isn't it interesting how one drug can do wonders for one person and be wrong for another? Just goes to show how different all of out bodies chemistries are. The one side effect I had that I LOVED was the vivid dreams. Never before or since have I had ones like that.. I kinda miss 'em

Anyway, I hope you will stick around and chat with the group.

[JudoMom]

Hi April... I am pretty new here too and just changed my handle as well (due to some online problems elsewhere).

I've been dealing with depression as well. Although the doctor called mine situational, I kinda wonder as I read more and more about it. My hub has dealt with it, and our 19 year old son has been dealing with it since he was 13. Sometimes I wonder if I haven't had it longer too.

I was on Celexa. It did wonders for me, but I gained 16 pounds on it in 5 months and that got my back up big time. I convinced my doctor I was ok and came off it slowly. The pounds are starting to move now. I rejoined WW near the end of July. I lost the first week and then stalled out. I missed my weigh-in this week (was out of town and didn't quite make it back in time). But I braved my own scales this morning and nearly fell over! I hope Tuesday's weigh in is as kind!!

SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder) is very very real. I live to the east of you, in sw Manitoba, and I think my whole family is affected by it, particularly if depression is also involved.

You can order lights for it. I'm going to include the website. I bought a lamp about 10 years ago. I didn't use it last winter, and last winter I ended up on antidepressants. I'm pulling it out end of Sept this year and am going to faithfully use it. You need about 1/2 hour a day in front of it.

http://www.northernlight-tech.com/eng/default.asp

This is the company I ordered from. It was prompt!! and better yet, it's in Canada, so no duty, taxes or any other surprises! They have much more in choice now than when I got mine. I think I got mine close to when they first opened.

Nice to have met you

[april99]

Hi everyone,

It's nice to see that I'm not the only one suffering with depression. Normally I hardly ever talk about it--not even to my dh. Only when it got really bad & I would end up crying on on the phone to 1 of my sisters in Ontario.

meg1+2---not only did I have 3 sons, then there was my dh, but we have had 3 male dogs over the years. The dog we have now is a male. So I have been the lone female with all these males.
It was quite different when I was growing up. I am the oldest of 6 girls. I have 1 brother & he is the youngest. So I didn't know much about males when I had these boys.

I missed a dose of the Effexor XR in Feb. when I had daycare surgery. The next night was just terrible. I cried all evening. I have also had the vivid dreams.

JudoMom---I have 2 sons dealing with depression. My father & my maternal grandmother had manic depression. I have read that when you have that in your family---there is often depression also.
Thanks for including the website about the lights.

April

[Leenie]

Hey April,

No your not the only one, but your one of the few that will talk about it.......CONGRATULATIONS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Well if you've been lurking for a while then you probably know my story, so I won't bore you again.

I'm glad you joined us.

See you on the daily's

Love, Leenie