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Old 09-17-2009, 12:30 AM   #1  
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Default I didn't know where else to go

If I were to talk to my psych about suicidal thoughts would she automatically admit me to the hospital or is that my decision only? Because, every time she asks me 'Have you had any suicidal thoughts?' I say no. But I'm lying. I guess I feel since I don't have them ALL the time that I'm not suicidal or I don't really want to do it or that I've gotten over it. But here it is again tonight. I feel like I'm never going to get better. I just don't know what to do.
I don't want to tell her about it because I don't want to wind up in the mental health floor in the hospital. I know too many people who work there -family, friends and I'm in the RN program at school) lol. Plus, who knows how long I'd be there --- I have a baby to care for. I just want help to not feel like this. My anti-depressants aren't working for that. They only make me feel like 10% happier. But I still have suicidal thoughts. I guess my main question is; is it illegal for her to not admit me if I tell her about it?
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Old 09-17-2009, 12:38 AM   #2  
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Hon, I don't have any answers for you but I'm sending you some hugs
Sounds like you need more help than a forum can give you, do you have a doctor that you trust? someone you can talk to and get the help you need right now?
Take care
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Old 09-17-2009, 01:10 AM   #3  
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It is not illegal for you not to tell her about it, but I think you should. Just because you tell her doesn't mean that she will automatically have you admitted. It sounds like you are struggling and need help. Don't hold back from the people who are trained to help you.

I am sorry you are going through this. Please ask your doctor for help.

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Old 09-17-2009, 02:07 AM   #4  
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I dont know where you are from, but here I think that if you told her that she would almost definately ask more questions rather than instantly admitting you. I think she would only admit you (here) if she thought you were in significant danger of harming yourself or someone else- for e.g. if you had actually, truly tried to commit suicide before, or if you've been taking steps towards it and have a date in mind etc. I dont think its illegal for her not to admit you, its a matter of her professional judgement on your individual case.

In the least, I would tell her the antidepressants arent working. Because theres no point in going through all the counselling and the drugs if they arent working, not only do you deserve better, its also a waste of your time and money! you can get better
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Old 09-17-2009, 02:24 AM   #5  
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Mine didn't. At the time, I felt awful and admitted to the thoughts crossing my mind and she was very understanding. I had the same worries as you, but we just talked about it and put me on anti-depressants. Only if they think you are an immediate danger to yourself would they go down the hospitalization route. Thinking about something and being on the verge of it are very different. Don't worry about it and fess up. If you don't they can't help you.

Know too that it can get better! I am not on meds anymore and am reasonably happy - definitely not thinking the dark thoughts I used to. Take care .
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Old 09-17-2009, 09:05 AM   #6  
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When I was taking zoloft it gave me wicked thoughts... I'm truly embarassed to even talk about it so maybe your meds are the cause.... it was for me.

I think you should tell your doctor and get on some new meds. I know its not easy, I've been there too but once you get it off your chest, it'll feel like the world has been lifted off your shoulders.

Please call your doctor
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Old 09-17-2009, 03:30 PM   #7  
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First of all, there are different definitions of "suicidal thoughts". There are serious thoughts which are constant and severe and then there are other things. When I am very down and driving around I think about driving into a telephone pole or off a bridge. I guess you could consider those suicidal thoughts although I would never carry out such thoughts. Yes, you need to talk to your doctor. If she is good and cares, she won't just throw you in a hospital. Also, you can never do enough research. If the AD you are on isn't helping, it might not be the right one for you. I cannot take SSRI's, as they make me crazier. I need an SNRI such as Effexor or the Wellbutrin I currently take. It makes ALL the difference. If your depression runs in the bipolar spectrum (and there are many types, not just manic depression) an SSRI will make you feel worse. Try to read as much as you can. That said, some doctors are offended by a patient who shows knowledge. That's BS. If your doc won't listen to you and respect you FIND A NEW ONE!!!! I finally found a doc that does that for me and has helped me tremendously. Please keep us updated.
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