I am trying to get in touch with myself. On the outside I think I am happy and have a fabulous life and no real problems except the 80+ pounds I have slowly put on since my marriage 37 years ago. But I many times sit around the house in a fog. I find it hard to be motivated to do anything. Food becomes my comfort, my friend. I know what to do and how to do it but I don't do it. Is this depression or laziness??? I just don't know why I don't have the drive or determination to move ahead. Intellectually I know the benefits that will come with weight loss. I am currently a WW but move at a snail's pace and get more discourged when my weigh-ins are bad. Do I need help from a shrink? Would love to hear from others on this issue.

Welcome to the boards. I am glad you stopped in. I don't think any of us here are qualified to diagnose whether or not you have depression. But if you are posting here, you must have some suspicions this might be it. It could very well be depression.

Please make an appointment with your family doctor. He or she can best asses your needs and rule out any causes other than depression. If you are suffering from depression, there is help out there for you. Your doctor might or might not refer you to a psychiatrist. In California, there is a 3-4 month wait to get into see one, so my internist is prescribing my medication herself.

Good Luck

Hi SA,

I agree with Linda, only your doctor can help you and if your not satisfied with his/her diagnosis, please get a 2nd opinion. I am going tomorrow (wednesday) to the doctor because for the past 4+ years now I have been depressed or at least I think I am. I have gained a ton of weight and like you I think I'm just lazy, my attitude is I just don't care anymore. Well I can't fight this feeling anymore, I need help, so that is why I am going. I am definitly not the person I use to be. I NEED HELP !!!!

We're here if you need to talk.
Love Leens

Hi there....

Like everyone else...I agree you should see a doctor. I waited such a long time to because I was scared and embarrassed to go, but I did make the leap and went about three weeks ago. It was the best thing I could have ever done. It felt so good just to get the door open and the medication seems to helping me! I am not a doctor person (high anxiety about it) and I am not a meds person either...but it was the right choice and the right thing for me to do. I am also seeing a counselor (which is awkward, but will keep going) to help me with some issues (overeating, personal loss, regaining confidence). If you are wondering about it...try it.

Also, we are here for you...it is great to have a support network to talk about anything and everything!

Take care,
Trace

Thanks to all of you who are taking the plunge to get help. It is hard to know where to go to get help. I have heard horror stories about shrinks and it kind of scares me to do it. Linda, I live in your area....have any suggestions? Thanks again for your support.

I am sorry, I didn't notice you were from California at first. Well, first thing would be to find a doctor you like. If you don't have a doctor, I can recommend San Jose Good Samaritan Medical group. I have had good luck with them. A lot depends upon your health insurance.. some only cover certain medical groups/ clinics.. etc.

First thing is to stop thinking of them as shrinks. They are doctors who are there to help you, not to experiment on your brain for fun. . Since you are in my area, more than likely you will be treated by your regular doctor, as there is a long waiting list to get in to see psychiatrists. I saw one at one time, but all he did was monitor my medication and I went to see him once every 4-6 months.

Therapy , if you chose that option, isn't like in the movies where you are lying on a couch talking about things while the doctor doodles the word "crazy" on a notepad. When I went, it was just like sitting around talking to a good friend who listens. I picked a female therapist, but that was just my personal choice.

First step is the hardest.... and there is help.

What is is a name??? Who knows, but I have no negative connotations to the word "shrink". It is an easy way to lump the different kinds of therapists in one easy category. Actually, my daughter is a PhD Clinical Psychologist and she and her colleagues use the name for fun between themselves.
She has suggested I see someone, but since she does not practice in this area, is not able to recommend anyone, but thinks I should see someone who treats eating disorders and depression. It is just something I have not done....among the many. That's part of the problem. Thanks for the advice, I appreciate it.

I agree with everyone to get a positive diagnosis. I also agree that talking to someone is very important. A therapist helped me to stay off of anti-depressants (I wanted to stay off because I was trying to concieve a child). Unfortunately, depression, shrinks, and anti-depressants have a negative connotation. It is very normal and nothing to be ashamed of.

Not to use this as an excuse. But you said you've been married 37 years. I don't know how old you are exactly, but have you started menopause? Either menopause or perimenopose can contribute to depression. I don't know how you feel about alternative medicine...but there are many treatments other than hormone therapy available. I went to a herbalist/accupuncturist and now take a combination of "female" herbs and St. John's Wort that have helped a great deal. I had previously been on anti depressants. And this helps as just as much - with no side effects. Therapy may help to; however, you need to be ready to commit to that. I've tried before, but can't do that right now. Check out Christiane Norththrop's book about menopause. She's been on Oprah quite a bit.

Many thanks to all of you. The suggestions have been helpful and I am thinking about it all. Actually, I have been having a great week and have lost 1.5 lbs over the Easter week. And the exercising I have been doing must be generating endorphins because I have been busy, positive and active. The weather is also changing from the doldrums to warm and sunny and thatr also feels good. I don't think I am in the true sense, in clinical depression, and hope that will last. If not I will certainly get help. Thank. SA