Lizziness - thanks for the update ANY talking is a step in the right direction!

I hope you find peace within yourself, one way or another.

Heather

Lizziness -- tough situation, but I think you are wise to make an effort to work it out. My husband and I are both sarcastic people, but it's difficult to figure out where the "line" is. And, having gained 100 lbs since we met, I guess I started to take it all personally, because I was so disgusted with myself. I've also figured out some of the things I need just won't be found in my marriage -- I'm starting to make new friends and get out with people, because my husband said "he's embarassed to be seen with me in public" because of my weight gain. I have two kids, debt, dog, etc. so leaving just isn't that simple here either. So, I've decided since at this point especially for my kids, the option to stay is the only one, then I too have to get out and find what I need to make myself happy and to build a friend base to support that.

Good luck -- sounds like you are headed in the right direction.

You make sense, after all there's the cat!

It's not easy doing the self work stuff. Years ago I had to do a project for a Psych class that taught me a ton about myself. Guess that was the objective eh? I had to make a 'Me Bag'. Using a brown paper grocery bag I had to decorate the outside to show how I thought others perceived me. On the inside I had to place things that symbolized what I thought were me on the inside. Sounds simplistic but that was tough! It forced me to actually think about me on a deeper level than just the number on the scale & the number in the bank account. Then in private I had to explain the whole thing to the instructor. Since I've required that my grown children do the same thing. Everyone is stumped at first but we grow in the process.

We don't need to know but you do, figure out what you're made of & how you think others perceive you. Then decide how you want to be perceived & received. Drill deep until you learn you. If you have to spend your whole life with someone, it should be a good relationship. You need to get to know you!

Now, what's on that wish list of stuff to do? Self esteem isn't one of those things that you can magically talk into existance. The more on that list that you check off the more validation that you will be able to point to and say "See there! I am a totally fantastic chick!'

We're all on a journey, check in & let us know how yours is going.

Take care!
Marylynn