Quote:
I do believe the only way I can conquer this is with professional counseling. But I'm terrified of the aspect of learning the reason behind this. For now, it's been buried and I fear it may just be mentally healthier for repressed feelings to remain unknown. I think the reason behind this is going to be too much for me to handle.
It's important to me to control the binges. I need to set goals to make them less frequent. They have been since I started my journey. Before I'd binge 5 or 6 days out of the week ALL day long and now I binge only 1-3 days out of the week. That's half of what it was before, and I feel it's a significant improvement.
I'm getting better on my own, but I wish I didn't have to deal with this at all. It makes dieting so much harder.
Thanks everyone!!!
Originally Posted by HarpoChicoGroucho
I am not an emotional eater, I don't eat when I'm upset or angry, I cry and NEVER have turn to food. I crawl into bed and usually do some major self-contemplation. That's why I'm so lost about WHY exactly I binge. I know I'm not trying to satiate the physical appetite with a binge, but I can't pinpoint my what is it that is empty inside of me that I'm trying to fill up with food. It's not an emotion (well sometimes it's complacency, because I've been doing so well on my diet that triggers an all out binge, and I say 'I deserve one cookie, it won't hurt')I do believe the only way I can conquer this is with professional counseling. But I'm terrified of the aspect of learning the reason behind this. For now, it's been buried and I fear it may just be mentally healthier for repressed feelings to remain unknown. I think the reason behind this is going to be too much for me to handle.
It's important to me to control the binges. I need to set goals to make them less frequent. They have been since I started my journey. Before I'd binge 5 or 6 days out of the week ALL day long and now I binge only 1-3 days out of the week. That's half of what it was before, and I feel it's a significant improvement.
I'm getting better on my own, but I wish I didn't have to deal with this at all. It makes dieting so much harder.
Thanks everyone!!!
I totally get that sometimes you can only deal with what is in front of you, and the easiest fix is to just not eat the trigger foods. But, the bottom line is what was said, the root of the binging is emotional, and binge eating and compulsive overeating is from emotions. It sounds to me that you may be using food to stuff those feelings that you don't want to be with...
Just remember no on has ever died from having a feeling
and that you are a strong woman that is willing to look at triggers and working it which is just as hard as the emotions.......You are doing great, do what you can, but honestly the sooner you deal with why the binging occurs (and the truth is that food triggers only feed off of that part of us) you will be so much happier. You won't believe how much energy your spending NOT dealing with the feelings...
I speak this from experience..I am not able to binge right now because I am waiting for surgery and food makes me ill right now, so what am I being forced to be with....Feelings....but my favorite binging is on cookies....I kid that there is a law that says you cannot have an open box of cookies in the house. A lot of my skinny friends binge, they just don't keep binge foods in the house. If I really want cookies, now I go to the bakery part of the store and I buy 3 cookies instead of a box...
My personal belief is that we can't deal with these issues alone, we are meant to share and be supported, that is why this site is so successful. OA and other groups are amazing, and sharing and more than that, hearing others struggles will inspire you and make you see the amazing strong person you are...
good luck to you..
RB
It seems to me I like (LOVE) heavy foods. Breads, cakes, poptarts, cookies, CHOCOLATE, etc.......I guess maybe they are easy access....no preperation involved. Hmmmmm. I will elaborate (since that is what this forum is for, right?) on my childhood. I "had" a very trying childhood.......or no childhood at all I could say. I don't remember playing or toys or amusement parks or anything like that. My mom was a single mom, my dad was a "player". They divorced when I was 6 or 7?!?!?! My mom re-married to the step father from ****. Of course she eventually saw his "side", but it took many years. So needless to say after many years of sexual and mental abuse I am who I am today. Let me clear some things up. I was a sad, emotional child, early teenage years were tough too. However I did turn to a "nice boy" at 16 who protected me. I later married him because I felt safe. Later (like 6 years) we started a family. Have two beautiful daughters 18 & 14. And, after 21 years of marriage, divorced. My weight during the 21 years was anywhere from 150# to 290#, I ravishly binge everytime I have an "issue"! Money, stress, work, deaths, job issues, memories of my childhood. My poor husband didn't stand a chance. God Bless him for the 21 years of tolerating me. After the divorce, I met a great guy and after 3 years married. Life is good. My daughters love him, everyone has adjusted and became a family again. I STILL BINGE EAT! I just yesterday, ate a 1# box of CHOCOLATE plus numerous other things in a bored rage. NOTE girls *** I work in a CANDY STORE!!!! The old fashion kind, where they have the glass display cases and they make all their candy. Don't ask! I was an administrave asst. at the police department and got tired of the crap so I changed professions all together. I actually love my little job and think that if I didn't have access to it there, I'd find it somewhere else. Right? Well, thanks everyone for listening and sharing your stories. You girls are awesome.
). I love that you appreciate the time you had with your ex, and that you emphasize the good stuff in your life. 
Ugh!!!
How many times can I tell myself that this is the last binge???