I think that I have finally admitted to myself that my weight issues are purely emotional. My weight is out of control. I eat when I'm not hungry. I eat all day - hungry or not. I reward myself with food. I console myself with food.
When I diet, I become obsessed with food - I think about food all day, which makes me want to eat more and more.
I need to find help. I went to OA years ago, for a short period of time. I didn't really enjoy the meetings - I didn't feel like I belonged. However, I now feel that I am ready to try again. This time I'm not looking for a quick fix... this time I realize that I need to change my brain. I need support. I need help. I am very stubborn, always trying to do things myself. But, past failures have shown that doing it myself is not working. I am depressed. I feel hopeless. I feel broken.
I have discovered that my body doesn't like certain foods, yet I keep eating those foods - in large quantities. It is like I am purposefully trying to hurt myself - as though I am self-harming (dietary form of cutting?) Not sure this is making any sense. Thanks for listening to my rant.

(((hugs))) it totally makes sense to me...i also struggle with eating things that i know aren't good for my body (sugar, wheat)...hard to break that addiction...i also eat all the time, for any reason, purely emotional and to deal with stress of various kinds...

I just found this forum and I am totally relate to what you are saying. Today was a bad day for me... I was pretty stressed and I think the food in a way numbs the pain, like I'd rather have negative feeling about eating and my body overshadow the other tough things I have to deal with.

Hugs! Tomorrow will be better.

I have been where you are for most of my life. Even though I have successfully lost weight, I am STILL where you are emotionally, thinking about food even when I'm not hungry. I have heard that even people who successfully break the binge habit can take 5-7 years before the positive habits they learned come naturally.

If you live in a populated area, I suggest doing a search for binge eating disorder treatment in your area. It can be expensive without insurance, but a treatment program could be very helpful for you.

I wish you the best of luck

I'm so glad that I'm not alone. I sure feel that way most of the time. Thank goodness we have this forum to make us feel a little less lonely.

I have felt his way plenty of times, just try to find something that works for you and stick with it. Have you tried to go on a diet that's consistent?