So, I am no stranger to binging. In the past, I have turned to mindless eating in order to numb emotional pain and stress. Happily, I have curbed my binging behavior and now mostly use food as fuel for my body, rather than medication for emotional unrest. It has been months since I have binged in an out of control way on food.
On Friday, I had some upsetting news. On Saturday, I still had not dealt with those feelings and once again, turned to food for comfort. I shoveled in all the available unhealthy foods I could find without even tasting or enjoying any of it. My stomach is a mess today.
So, the question is, what will I do the next time I am upset or stressed and go to my old standby of binging on food? I think the key is to remember that the stress and after effects of binging are oftentimes worse than the original thing that is upsetting me. In other words, my cure is worse than the ailment. So, I need to find another cure - whether it is a long walk, listening to music, getting lost in a good book, taking a bubble bath, watching a movie/TV, talking to a friend, or maybe just making a nice cup of hot tea or coffee(as long as I don't take any biscuits to go with it!) - I need to find a new way to deal with emotional upset other than binging on food.
What take away lessons have you learned from binging?
What I learned from bingeing is that it will never be enough. Binging on food will not fill the void in my heart that I was feeling. I wanted it to, but it never fully satisfied me. The feeling was so temporary I found it was pointless to give in to it when it was only followed by self-contempt.
Instead I listen to music, watch a good movie, read a book, study, do homework, bake FOR SOMEONE ELSE. Distract yourself.
I can totally relate....I don't know if this will help you or not, but I read a quote on here somewhere that said: "If food is not the problem, then it's not the solution," or something to that effect. I try to remind myself of this fact when I have the urge to binge. Also, I have some habits that I have been able to recognize over the years...along with triggers that remind me when I'm "at risk" of binge eating. The habits are...I'm usually alone when I binge. I usually am downstairs and the t.v. is on. If I have the urge to binge, the best thing I can possibly do is to take a fruit upstairs and lock the bedroom door. That way, I have some food, but it's healthy and in a very limited quantity. I also chew gum...sometimes an entire pack, which isn't healthy but is certainly better than some of the alternatives. My triggers are: not sleeping enough, low grade or high level stress/anxiety, social situations that surround food, not working out, eating something off plan. I think there are more but can't think of them now.
I can also totally relate - I link emotions with eating and stress, upset and tiredness all bring on bingeing because somewhere in the past - I learnt that this was the cure and for a while it worked - but the consequences outweigh the therapy.
I am trying to change the way that I deal with stress and tiredness which are my big binge triggers - so i am working with therapies for stress at present and it appears to be working somewhat ........hope this helps
That's a wonderful attitude. It's much better to analyze our feelings and search for alternatives when we binge, rather than just feeling sorry for ourselves and drown in guilt. Taking a walk with music blasting in my headphones is great for me. It helps me to clear my thoughts, put them in order and find solutions to my problems. In the end, we have to deal with whatever is troubling us, binging just means prolonging negative emotions.
For me doing something else never worked because I would be depressed or upset I'm hardly going to be able to hop up and go ah forget about you feelings or energy levels Im getting dressed and going for a walk, when I was so insular I wouldnt of even been able to see the beauty outside I would just be living in my head thinking about how im not getting what I "need"
saying that those nurturing things like walking, clubs, projects etc. help when binge feelings come up as they strenghten me but I can't mentally engage in any of those properly once I'm in the binge zone.
I had to go cold turkey, I was literally in a comfort zone of pain, I had to just sit out the feelings many times to reassure my body and mind that the world isnt going to end because i didnt go out to the shops and get x, that life isn't worse without binge foods (never keep them in my house, always go shopping when in a good mood with a list, I never keep the kitchen empty so then i have to go to the shops hungry and upset)
My whole diet used to be one big binge, extra large cereal that tasted good, six potatos with butter or 4-6 slices of toast for lunch, chocolate bar and crisp for snacks, dinner being more carbs and maybe once a week a tub of icecream, toast at night.. I was just vegetating and literally thought that if I didnt have those foods to look forward to what would i have but they were the things that were stopping me having the things I wanted.
I have had two binges this month, three days each I know myself well now, on a daily basis I eat well on a weekly basis I manage the pitfalls well but when someone else hands me food I still feel like I have to eat it as if it will never be available ever again.
Anyway on my own was worse and I realised once I had stopped binging regularly or eating trigger foods at every meal I started crying which I never did and it was such a turning point, some nights I have belly cried and held myself feeling so low instead of feeling a fake hapiness with food and tv and pushing away the feelings but also I was pushing away myself, I was using every food, activity, career, thing, too much put on other people to make me feel better as a barrier between normal coping me and hurting me, I am not sure how I did it I just got sick of it and decided I am not afraid, counselling for the last 3 years obviously is a big reason I was just able to make such a big leap, it took two years to tell her I used food as a substance even though I was obviously overweight and I felt such shame, I was afraid to say the words, it was like I let out the secret.
I wish I couldn't relate. I just did today, and actually ended up purging and then exercising really hard to make up for it. I only do that every few months; unfortunately, I binge probably at least once a week, depending on how you look at it.
I feel like my only options right now are to avoid being alone at any mealtime and to replace my reflex of eating food as a way to relax with exercising.
I've just started counseling, so hopefully that helps. I'm just disappointed because I was proud of my progress and resolve until today. :\
Turning a binge into a learning experience
