| Dudethisisgold |
10-06-2017 06:04 AM |
Dude
Originally Posted by buildx87:
Well I lost it today unfortunately. Just finished a 4,500 calorie binge. :(
It started this morning. I abruptly woke up around 5am this morning and headed straight to the fridge and ate an entire box of "organic" cheerios with a ton of milk!! I have no idea why either. I didn't even feel consciously alert. I just woke up and ATE a whole box of cheerios!! This was probably the beginning stages of the binge.
After I ate it I went right back to bed and woke up. I woke up and I asked myself what happened but I really did eat the whole box. I started getting hungry around 11am. It was legit hunger (hunger paigns, stomach cramp, etc). So I ate some oatmeal..then some tuna..then a 1/2 cup of brown rice..and then another 1/2 cup of brown rice. So a little bit after that I went to the store and did my weekly grocery shopping. Bought pretty much anything that looked good for the week (I'm not too strict)...bought 10 protein bars (to last me through the week), box of cereal, chicken, lean red meat, tuna, veggies, apples, cottage cheese, fruits, etc. Felt perfectly fine and in control when I was buying all this stuff. Didn't even think about taking it home and binging.
Well I got in my car and I immediately started thinking of those protein bars. Especially the chocolate peanut butter one. I ate one in my car and game over. Thoughts such as "I am going to eat them all" started to intrude my head. I ate another, then another..and then...
Here I am finishing off all 10 bars PLUS the whole box of cereal. :( At least I didn't eat the ice cream but dang..I binged!!! :(
Right now I feel relieved and the cravings/urges/thoughts have subsided. I did not snap out of it until I finished eating all the protein bars and cereal. Of course I have thoughts such as "this will never happen again" which is obviously not true. I see my therapist tomorrow so I'll discuss this. I also have a self-help book on the way that I am going to start reading.
I am not upset so much that I went on excess calories, I am upset I gave into it. That's what bothers me the most. I understand that you can always lose weight and cut down. Granted I am not "happy" I am gaining weight from doing this, it's losing the fight that bothers me.
Dude I created an account And went through the verification process just to say that this comment made me laugh harder and longer than I have in the last year. I'm sorry if this comes across in a negative manner, it's more or less your writing. Dude this is gold. |
