Chicks in Control Overeating? Binging? Share uplifting support and gain control!

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Old 02-19-2010, 11:17 PM   #1  
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Default I have a "real" addiction too!

Why is it people talk about being addicted to chocolate, sugar, or food in general, like it's a joke? People will say, "I'm a chocoholic" with a big grin on their faces, and then go nosh on it while others smile indulgently.

I'm here to say, it's just as real as any other addiction to any other substance. I once went a week without chocolate and actually had withdrawal. I mean shakes, sweats, stomach cramps, the whole bit! I have physical symptoms that "tell" me when I "need" chocolate! (That's my drug of choice, but like a lot of addicts who substitute one chemical when they can't easily obtain another, I'll go to other sweets if there is no chocolate available. And if there is nothing sweet in the house, I just go monkeybrains!)

But now, keep in mind that if I were to say "chocolate is my drug of choice" to someone who is not a food addict, particularly to someone who *is* addicted to some chemical such as cocaine, I'd be thought to be making a joke at best, making light of their addiction at worst.

People don't understand that food addiction is exactly that, addiction. Haters will slam us with "Just put down the Big Mac and get off the couch and take a walk, fatso!" Even those who are trying to be supportive, not hateful, will pep-talk us with, "You are NOT powerless! You CAN do it! It just takes a little self-discipline!" They wouldn't say that to an alcoholic or drug addict going into rehab. The public readily recognizes alcoholism and drug addiction as an illness that needs treatment. And, most people know by now that the first step to recovery is admitting powerlessness over the substance. But food addiction doesn't have the same support. Food addiction gets belittled with "Just eat less."

Why is it this way, and what can we do about it?
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Old 02-19-2010, 11:59 PM   #2  
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People do joke about alcoholism and other addictions (gambling, sex, shopping). Humor very often is insensitive. In fact, almost all humor is insensitive (at least humor more sophisticated than a knock-knock joke).

Alcoholics are not imune from the "you're not powerless" pep talks. The first step in AA is to admit powerlessness, but admitting powerlessness is not synonomous with believing you have no power.

Telling an alcoholic or a compulsive eater, "You are not powerless. You can abstain" is essentially true. It isn't easy, but it's still true.

It's true that some addictions and compulsive behavior problems get more respect and compassion than others. Food addiction isn't on the bottom of that spectrum. Sex addiction probably has that dubious distinction (unless you're a celebrity at least) - at least in the midwest.

I've worked with people with many addictions, and sex addiction is probably the most misunderstood and most difficult to find support. I could link up my clients with a support group for almost every compulsion except sex addiction.

My clients would say their friends or family would laugh and say " I wish I had you're problem." One woman said, "WHen my sister called me a slut, she wanted me to babysit her kids all the time, now that I call myself a sex addict, she won't even let me visit or be around my nieces and nephews."

People sometimes suck. They make fun of criticize (or ignore) what they don't understand.

That's the "why," the "what to do about it," depends on your goals. You can't MAKE folks understand, you can only try to educate (hope some people, at least those closest to you get it) and build your own support system. Seek out the people who DO understand - not only in online-and in-person support groups like 3FC or OA, but in friends and family members that understand (or at least try to).

Last edited by kaplods; 02-20-2010 at 12:01 AM.
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Old 02-20-2010, 01:08 AM   #3  
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Wisdom as usual from kaplods.

For the record, shortly after making the OP I decided I needed an OA meeting, fortunately one was starting online within 15 to 20 minutes. I got a lot of help from that, and as I stated myself in the meeting, "The first step says we admitted we were powerless over the addiction. It doesn't say the whole rest of the world has to admit it too." The point is, *I* know I am a food addict, and that it is not a joke, so what remains is for me to treat my disease, and let the rest of the world do what it wants.

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Old 02-20-2010, 11:49 AM   #4  
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It's so true that it's an addiction, and that people just don't recognize it as such. I wonder though, with everything that is coming out now and in the past few years, about how our food isn't really food, if it's going to get better? I'd like to be optimistic about it! You read in the news sometimes now about how many of the ingrediants that are used in "food" today make you crave them more--in other words, they make the foods addictive.

I'm not sure if this is actually going to do any good, but it seems to be a step in the right direction.
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Old 02-20-2010, 12:08 PM   #5  
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I have to say, I had a substance abuse problem and I went into rehab in Sept. of 2008. I'm 25 years old and fairly new to life without the help of my drug of choice.
Food addiction is absolutely a real addiction. It's something I didn't recognize when I was abusing medication but I surely recognize now. Hindsight is always 20/20 and looking back, I remember days when I would eat a Dozen doughnuts in one sitting multiple times a week. I gained almost 50 pounds in a yr... maybe less.
Now that the drugs and cigaretts and alcohol are loooong gone... food is my go to comfort. When I don't have something, (take-out food is my VICE), I feel more depressed, physically exhausted, distracted, irritable...
There are triggers, just like with hardcore drugs, that make you eat. For me, it's when I spend a long day outside & I know take-out is right around the corner... a burger, or Quesedilla and fries... I go for it because it's easy and what I want and sometimes, what I need!
Food addiction is real honey!
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Old 02-20-2010, 12:45 PM   #6  
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I'm hesitant to discuss my overeating problem, because I worry that people won't actually take me seriously. I don't know if I take myself entirely seriously, or am too hard on myself, because I *do* tend to be unsympathetic to those who whine about their problems and not do anything about them. So I try to push that aside and just work on me, "Know Thyself" and know my triggers.

And sometimes, that means stocking up on skim milk chocolate pudding because it's a plannable, workable, chocolate source. *shrug* Works for me.

Cheers, kaplods.
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Old 02-20-2010, 04:34 PM   #7  
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I don't think there's anyway to change the difference in perception between alcohol/drugs and food because unlike alcohol/drugs, food is probably seen by most people as just something you have to have to live. To most, it's probably seen as a neutral, non-addictive substance so they don't get what the big deal is to stop eating it. But, I think ALL people recognize the 'high' someone can get from alcohol/drugs. If we asked 10 people why an alcoholic drinks (or anyone drinks for that matter), 10 people would probably say "to tune out, numb themselves, feel better, etc...", but if you asked the same 10 people why does someone overweight eat so much, they probably couldn't tell you. They'd rely on the old, "because they're pigs or greedy or something..." They probably don't have a clue they could answer the same way as with the alcoholic question.
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Old 02-20-2010, 07:16 PM   #8  
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My hubby says the difference between food addiction and alcohol/drug addiction is that overeating won't make you drunk to the point where you lose your senses, or land you in jail. Nobody's ever been arrested for public obesity or driving while fat.

Doesn't make it less of an addiction though. I, for one, will die if I don't get it under control. Addiction compels us to do things that are going to kill us.

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Old 02-20-2010, 09:42 PM   #9  
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Lovebirdsflying - What your husband says is true; I guess that's why I've personally rationalized my "habit" all these years saying it's OK because it's better than alcohol/drugs... Gotta get out of that mindset. It's not OK. I agree with you; it can be a silent killer!
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Old 02-20-2010, 09:43 PM   #10  
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Well, Mrs. Brady, maybe you can use the example of smoking cigarettes. Cigarettes definitely kill people over time, although symptoms might not be present for years. Yet, there are tons of people who need helplines, medication & therapy to quit and avoid severe withdrawal.

You're absolutely right about addiction compelling us to do critically unhealthy things. People don't always understand that part about overeating or binging because the effects aren't immediate. Sometimes I feel like I wont be taken seriously until I wake up a 500 pound diabetic with blood blots in my legs!

Also, I know of tons of people who drink, pop pills, or shoot up and are completely functional human beings. One risk of being a substance abuser is breaking the law / stealing/ etc... but the most basic, critical risk is to our health... Every single addict of every and any kind risks death with long term use.

Good luck with this, seriously! I know what a difference it makes to have someone around you that totally understands the things that people think are not so important or serious, you know?
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