Hey guys, not sure if this is a good place to post this as I am new here, but this is my best shot.
I think one of the main reasons I over eat is because I am worried about the cost of food, basically.
For instance, I go to a family picnic or event where there is free food, and I'm like "wooohoooo!!" and I go to town and gorge myself.
Another example would be that when I go to buffets, which my friends do want to a lot, I feel like I have to get my money's worth, and thus, stuff my face.
Also, when I go out to normal restaurants, I think "hey, I'm spending MY money on things that are not super expensive, but more so than cooking at home so I am going to get what I WANT, not what's good for me. Bring on the bloomin' onions and burgers!"
These thoughts and actions are so heavily ingrained in me, I've acted this way my entire life and these examples are what ALWAYS, ALWAYS, ALWAYS break my diet. And it almost always is brought on my socializing, so I feel like if I socialize I have to eat and if I have to spend money and if I'm spending money I want what's good, and if it's free, I'm saving money.
Anyone else like this? It's so bad, I don't know to do make myself not act like this when I feel like it's part of me.
Instead of looking at a buffet place as an all-you-can-eat paradise, think of it instead as a choose-your-own-meal delight. I always get a large lettuce salad first, loaded with the leanest protein they have available (generally chicken), other veggies or fruits (such as tomatoes, cucumbers, green peppers, onions, olives, sugar snap peas, etc), a little cheese, and a low-fat dressing or a very small amount of a full fat one. I eat that first before I go for anything else, and I wait a little while before going back up. This keeps me from getting too much because after that large salad I have a hard time eating a lot of other foods. I generally save a little room for the pickled herring.
Think of it this way -- you are usually at a restaurant/BBQ, etc. with people to socialize -- take the center of your attention off the food and put it into conversation.
I also feel I've wasted my money if I don't walk away from a dinner feeling full (but not stuffed). If I walk away feeling like I overate, I've wasted the experience to try new foods by just eating mindlessly.
A buffet is a great place to try to find something nutritious you wouldn't normally eat -- that way if you like it, you may just buy it for home but if not, you can move on.
I can identify. We didn't have much when i was growing up and although we never went hungry, there were times when there was not much to eat and what there was could be very basic - soup and bread. I used to have the same attitude to 'free food' even when I could afford to buy it myself. I still had the mentality that I needed to take the opportunity to gorge whenever it presented itself. Same with buffets, I felt I needed to get my money's worth.
However you can change and I have. When offered cakes, sweets etc at work I just say 'no'. At buffets I make it an opportunity to chose the healthiest option I can and not just eat it because its available. Realistically in my life I am affluent enough not to have to ever worry about where the next meal is coming from, I can eat what I want when I want. Its all about making choices.
When it comes to buffets and giant restaurant servings or free food, the approach I've taken is - how is getting fatter and unhealthier and upsetting my stomach a bargain??? In what universe??? Am I actually supposed to feel better that I'm getting unhealthier for cheap?
Also, it helps me to remember that most treats (sweet or otherwise) show up in our lives pretty regularly. You really can skip that dessert or entree or whatever, and it won't be the last chance you have in life to have it. That seems like it should be obvious, but I still find myself thinking I have to have something just because it's good and it's there and I'd better have some.
I sympathize. We didn't have much money when I was a child, and there's always this nagging fear in the back of my mind that I'm going to be without, even though I work hard and take care of myself now. Not just without food but without other things. Sort of the idea of a bear that stores fat against the lean winter. But it is like JulieJ08 says: A bargain is what benefits you, and getting fat isn't a bargain because you're setting yourself and your family up for bigger expenses in the future, medical ones. I've really had to work on trusting in myself and my ability to provide for myself in the future, regardless of what happens, so I have the courage to face the uncertainty and know that I won't let myself starve. I know there are resources out there. One of the things I do to make myself feel better is donate food to the food bank.
You guys made some really excellent points and gave some great advice! I'm going to try hard to think about those next time I'm put into such a situation.
And yes, I'm sure money is some devise to explain to myself why I over eat, but it's how I explain/justify it to myself when it's happening, you know? Either way it's bad!!
I really love "how is getting fatter and unhealthier and upsetting my stomach a bargain??? In what universe???" That's an excellent way to think about it - thank you!!