Mon
Workout was really hard, in a good way. The trainer said my muscles fatigue more easily on this diet. That's what today was like. I must have had 3 extra protein packets. I feel ok now, so maybe that is just what was called for. I won't do that on non workout days, but it seemed like a good idea today.

2 L water-check

Taking my sore muscles to bed a little early.

Wed
Thanks Follena! I laughed at your last paragraph, well kinda. Bose headphones & Sade Reminds me there is a benefit to being a little hard of hearing

Nice to coffee with your very wise friend. I'm envious of those who retired so early. I'll be 66 next month & can't wait to sample doing nothing, napping whenever I choose. My early retirement was spent in my 50s following my muse of biology, cutting my work hours to take classes and do fieldwork. No regrets, I got my degree. In my 60s, I doubt my mind would want to be so focused.Though, once I get some relaxation time, I'd like to study paleontology-love the study of evolution.

Ok, back to planet earth:
Thanks Follena for the input re fat. I shy away from high fat, even healthy fat, because I am so imprinted with 'fats are bad you' & 'be sure to get enough protein'. I have a hard time losing with even a small amount of avocado or nut butter. But maybe I didn't stick with it long enough, or have the right overall macros. I think I may dip my toe in with adding them in, once I am firmly established in weight loss mode. With the constant family crises and right now high work intensity, it's a challenge to get used to NOT eating for comfort. yesterday I was trying to characterize the black mood I was in, mostly from my bro dumping his whiny stress on me as I got ready for work. It dawned on me this is how I felt with PMS, lo these many years. Reminds me of the temporary nature of things. "This too shall pass" Yay for a lesson from an old monthly friend. Carbs surely do smooth out the emotional sphere.

Note to self: Today will have its challenges but on a this day off, work is not one of them. I'll see if I can stick closely to the diet and not be afraid of hunger pangs. Each week, I have 3 long work days in which to feed myself as needed, leaving 4 short or off days to be rigorous. Just for a few more weeks. 9.5 to be precise

In spite of a rocky start to yesterday, I felt energized and strong. This is an early benefit of my workout and diet. Breaking free from my addictive eating pattern is so liberating. Looking forward to a scale whoosh and big changes in body contours soon. Let's see if those things are sufficient rewards to forego the instant gratification of eating extra food today. It's up to me and I am setting my intention.

All packets eaten. Salad with large chicken breast. Riced cauli. A small dill pickle. Lost appetite-another nightmarish day with a brand new crisis with my mother's health.

Thursday
Yesterday was on plan and I wasn't famished.

I'll feel better having the time to pack up a day's worth of meals, and getting in a workout before I go to the hospital, 90 minutes away. The physical activity shouldn't be demanding, so I plan to stick closely to plan, as I did yesterday. Challenge will be getting my water in.

Workout was more intense. Food was over plan with on-plan foods, 3-400 cals over.. I lost track of how many snacks I ate.hGot my water in.

Diet on plan pretty much. Yesterday was a blur, with my mom’s health. I got clarity thanks to incredible support of a guardian angel case mgr. who watches out for my mom, and palliative care team. My mom is comfortable & I am relieved and thankful.

Sundove: I am so sorry for your loss. I’m thinking about you and sending hugs.