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Old 07-15-2008, 04:03 AM   #1  
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Unhappy gained most back - starting over AGAIN

Hi Everyone,

This is really depressing to even write and I can't believe I let this happen.

Well, I started Calorie Counting May 06, went from 170 to 139. I am now up to 159 pounds and have not really counted calories since April 07. I guess I just got lazy after I accomplished so much and started slacking off. One week turned into 2 weeks, then a month, then another... and now over 1 year later I am ready to start being serious again. I know how to do it, I just need to motivate myself to count calories again and drop these 20 pounds that I have put back on.

How in the world did I allow 20 whole pounds to come back on? After all of my hard work? I should have known better! Now my clothes are tight again and I can't get into the jeans that were once loose. It's really depressing actually and I am disgusted in myself that I let this happen. Truely disgusted.

Anyone else in the same boat? I felt so much better about myself when I was counting calories. I felt like a slacker when I didn't. So, I want to be back where I was before. So, starting TODAY I am counting calries again and keeping track of my progress.

My birthday is in two (2) months. September 18th. If I can get rid of these pounds that I had once successfully lost, it will be the best birthday present ever in the world. I pray and hope that I can do it.

I've got 9 weeks. 2lbs per week will get me there. Can I do it? I have re-engaged in 3FC now as you can see and logged in my foods to FitDay as well today. There was a time that I wouldn't miss a single entry into FitDay. I literally had ONE year of logs for every single day. Those were the days that I mentioned above... where I had discipline and determination... where I worked to lose 30 lbs. I was so happy that I was able to accomplish that. I feel the exact opposite emotion now that I have gained 20 pounds back on. It really disgusts me; I can't even express how much.

All I want is to do what I once did with Calorie Counting, support from 3FC, and logging my food in FitDay. If I did it once, I can do it again, right? I wonder how long it will take me this time... it took almost 1 year to lose 30 pounds... what makes me think I can lose 20 pounds in 2 months? Regardless, just starting the progress will motivate me.

Anyone else with the same thing to happen to them? I'm really bummed but also very determined at the same time to get rid of this extra weight I carelessly packed back on. Hope I can do it... but can I really?
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Old 07-15-2008, 04:27 AM   #2  
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Or at least its in the process of occuring -sigh-

I have put the brakes on in the last couple days and also gone back to stricter calorie counting. My exercise is fine but I find it to easy to have a nibble on this or a taste of that...I love food just way to much! I need accountability!

I'm up for losing about 5 pounds mini-goal and 10 pounds by September ideally.
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Old 07-15-2008, 09:25 AM   #3  
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I hear ya. In 2005, I felt a lump on the back of my neck while showering. I tend towards being a bit obsessive. I worked in research with an oncologist so I asked him to take a look. He said that he felt something there. I was so freaked out that I had lymphoma from the way he talked, that for the first time in my life, I worried to the point where I couldn't eat. I dropped from 160 down to 150 in a little under a month.

When one month turned into 2 and I was down past 145, I saw 2 MDs who dismissed the possibility of cancer. After about 2 more weeks, I accepted the fact that the lump was not getting bigger and maybe was starting to disappear. I ATE LIKE NONE OTHER! I thought... 2 months of this?! I haven't eaten much in 2 months! I'm going to TOWN!

I packed on 15 lbs in no time. Here I am, fast forward 3 years... at 161. I hear ya about the weight gain.
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Old 07-15-2008, 10:48 AM   #4  
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You are motivated and you will get the weight off. Maybe not all 20 pounds by your birthday but you should get at least ten pounds off by then. You may want to consider south beach. I started the diet last week and it is helping me overcome my addictions to sugary and fatty foods. It might help you come off your last several month of unhealthy eating. Just a suggestion!
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Old 07-15-2008, 11:14 AM   #5  
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Welcome and good luck! Many of us could tell the same story, I am sure......I know I could.
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Old 07-15-2008, 11:54 AM   #6  
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Okay... First of all... Stop smacking yourself around. You do not deserve it. So you gained back some weight. Not ideal. But you are human. And you are allowed to be human. And hey... You didn't gain it all back. You recognized that a problem exists and you are taking steps to nip it in the bud. So good for you!

You have the tools you need to do this. You have the skill and the determination. You also have support. So, go for it! Don't worry about the pressure of being perfectly on plan, right now. Just decide that you are going to be on plan for breakfast. Then, try to stretch it to lunch. Hey, this isn't so bad, after all. You are starting to get the rhythm back... Go for working through to dinner. The next day, you say? No sweat!

And before you know it... Those twenty pounds are gone and you are back sitting in the catbird seat. All at goal and feeling fabulous about yourself.
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Old 07-15-2008, 12:04 PM   #7  
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I can relate on some level because I know the frustration of having lost weight, only to gain it back. I also sense a tone in your email of perfectionism. Do you have an all or nothing mentality like I do? If so, that could be part of the issue you and I face. If so, try to take some time to examin why you have this tough outlook on yourself and see if you can figure out a way to resolve it so that this doesn't happen again. You WILL lose the weight, but you must do it in a way that you can do for the rest of your life. It's like when someone wins the Lotto and they lose it all because they didn't get it the right way...know what I mean? I think calorie counting is the best possible way to go, but find a way to do it so that you can stick to it for more than a year. Maybe you could allow yourself one day a week where you eat don't binge...but you don't put anything down on fitday? I don't know...that might not be a good thing, but I'm just thinking it might help you deal with that perfectionism. Also, I might be totally wrong here, so please don't take this as a criticism at all. As I mentioned, this is something I have struggled with over the years and I'm still trying to figure things out. Stick around this site....the "chicks" who count calories are amazing!!!!
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Old 07-15-2008, 12:07 PM   #8  
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HAHA.. OMG, I love that angry red arm and leg flailing mad smiley guy.
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Old 07-15-2008, 12:12 PM   #9  
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I have been in the exact same place - I lost 95lbs ins 2001/2002 only to regain 128lbs. But here I am back down 95lbs. You can do this. The advantage that you and I have is that we know what to do and we know that we can be successful. So now it is just a matter of putting our foot down and making it happen.

You can do this and we are here to help.

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Old 07-15-2008, 12:19 PM   #10  
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But look what you are doing! You are getting a handle on things before you've gained it all back! So you are still ahead of a lot of us who ended up getting bigger than ever before we got a grip.

You already know what works for you so you have all the tools to get right back into those jeans! You've done it before so of course you can do it again!
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Old 07-15-2008, 12:22 PM   #11  
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Yep, I've been right where you are. Back in 2001, I lost 30 lbs (From 139 to 109). I kept if off until I started student teaching in 2004. I was so busy and stressed out that I "didn't have time" to exercise or watch what I ate. Sure enough, about a year later, I was back where I started. All that hard work out the window.

I started again though a few months ago with lots of success so far. If I can do it, you can do it!
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Old 07-15-2008, 04:30 PM   #12  
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My husband and I are both in the same boat. I dropped from 160 to 143 only to be back to 160. My husband dropped from 215 to 180 only to be back to 205. Yikes!

After having paid for our wedding we just don't have the money to go out and buy fat clothes again. Thus, it's a forced diet to get back into our skinny clothes. Haha. (And, really, we want to look better, feel better and be healthier again.)

Soooooooo. . . we're on day 6 of counting calories and being mindful. Right now I'm just debating how I want to celebrate my birthday next week.

I've scheduled myself to lose the weight by October 1st. (Just before my 10 year high school reunion.)

So, don't feel bad, there are tons others in the same boat as you.
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