Stardog, you said when I start drinking it I can't stop. This is one of the signs of alcoholism.There is help for this, if you want it.

I think everyone has made some very valid points. The title to your OP was "Alcohol is my downfall". Maybe it's the type of alcohol?

I had a very similar issue with beer - I didn't necessarily crave it on a daily basis but on the weekends I would pick up a 6 pack and would tell myself I would only have one or two but, before I knew it, the whole 6 pack would be gone in a just a couple of hours (and if a 12 pack was on sale so I got that instead - guess what? Yep, gone too). I knew it was not only getting in the way of my goal for better health but was a classic symptom of an addiction. Just cutting off drinking all together wasn't something I was ready to deal with since I'm in a town where there are so many business occasions that involve cocktail parties - if you don't have at least one, you get pegged as a recovering alcoholic who might fall off the wagon any minute and blow major deals

What I discovered is that having something other than beer - particularly something that I don't really care for, like scotch - made it really easy to sip slowly (rather than swig wich I did with the beer). I also made a hard and fast rule that for every "adult beverage" I consume, I have to drink at least 8 oz of water before I can have another. For some reason, this switch to a different type of alcohol has made it really easy for me to stop after one or two.

I also think that those of us who have been struggling with our weight for eons have fallen into the habit of using alcohol to kind of soften our disappointment in ourselves and make ourselves feel more like we fit in with "normal" people. I know when I was *buzzed* I didn't feel nearly as fat
Quite honestly, I am probably still using alcohol as a crutch of sorts but now it's evolved into just carrying around that glass of scotch on the rocks like a security blanket and I don't actually have to drink it

You could try switching to something else for your evening cocktail and see if you are able to have one glass and stop. If you still have to keep going until you "feel the high", you may have to step back and think hard about whether the high or your health is more important to you

I hear ya I crave a beer everynight but ya just gotta say no and break the habit.... just like smoking (or for me eating chocolate).

Say no, be strong, it will get easier... change your new 9:00 habit to something else.

I also crave wine when I am drinking it consistantly. To me, even a few times a week is consistant. When I make the committment to give it up completely, I do lose my cravings. Honest!! Give it a try and see what happens. I look forward to hearing that you've moved past your cravings!

Choose a light wine (white, pink) and mix with 1/2 seltzer water. You'll look and think that you're drinking a full glass, but only half of it has calories since seltzer is calorie-free. It will also make it carbonated, so you will be filled up on a smaller amount of alcohol.

Good Luck!

yoyodieter, love your response...

Stardog,

I too am unable (or unwilling, however you want to say it) to stop drinking once I've had one drink. Although "alcoholic" does sound really harsh, drinking until you're drunk (or buzzed or "high" or whatever) combined with persistent thoughts of/desire to does indicate that you should give your drinking a through look. For me, being healthy emotionally and physically (not to mention saving my marriage!) meant that my entire relationship with alcohol had to change, especially in the situations that were my triggers for binge drinking. It seemed impossible and horrible when I started. I felt like I was giving up ME, but now it seems like second nature.

My father died because of his addiction to alcohol and I justified my behavior for years by saying that my drinking looked nothing like his (he drank 4-7 times a week/I could get by getting really drunk once a week and he stayed home/I went out). A problem with alcohol is a problem with alcohol, even though it manifests itself differently for different people. Maybe you don't have a problem with alcohol, but when you say things like you can't stop and that it is your downfall . . . well, I think you can imagine why people are concerned for you.

Good luck!

Sorry, yoyo, but this strikes me as baloney... In my long experience as both a drinker and a non-drinker, no one really cares what someone else is drinking unless they themselves have a problem. If one is worried about fitting in, then it's easy enough to have a non-alcoholic drink that looks just like all the others.

Besides, there are other reasons that people don't drink. Religion is one of them. Health is another. It's no one's business why.

Jay

Have to agree with Jay ... that's an excuse.

There's no reason you can't order a diet coke with a lime in it or a tonic water with a lime in it, or even a glass of tomato juice. No one has to know that you're not drinking a rum and coke or a vodka and tonic or a bloody mary ... !

Saying that you can't not drink because people are watching ... that's simply not sensible.

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I agree. I really don't think OP is an alcoholic. That is unless there were some things left out in her postings.

It sounds like you've fallen into a rut. You probably do the same things every night. I'd bet that you eat a lot of the same foods, too. What you need to do is shake up your routine. Can you possibly go to bed early each night? Or, dedicate that time to exercising, reading, or a hobby that would take your mind off alcohol? I speak from experience, I know exactly what you are going through. I know the comforts of a routine, along with drinking as a part of the routine, is the reason I've gained weight in the last 2 years. I decided to shake things up 2 months ago. I've had alcohol exactly once since that time.

Crowd out the thoughts of drinking. Invite a friend to see a late movie. Go for a walk. Just do something different and I bet the feelings of "craving" alcohol will go away. To be honest, it really isn't a craving though I know it feels like one. It's actually a pattern that you have to break yourself. Good luck.

cmichele - I respect your thoughts and opinions here, but I do believe your comments are off base. "it's really not a craving, just a habit"? It sounds to me like you don't really understand what a problem with alcohol can look like.

When someone cannot stop drinking until they're drunk, when someone drinks not because they like the taste but specifically to achieve a state of drunkenness, when someone is unpleasant to be around when they're not drinking because they're thinking about drinking, when someone thinks about drinking until it becomes unbearable and they have to have one ... that is a problem. That's not a habit or a pattern or a rut.

Alcoholism and problem drinking have been a HUGE part of my life - both parents, my brother, my brother in law - all are alcoholics (either active or recovering). I myself know that I could easily fall into the problem drinking area: Although I don't have the alcoholic *craving* that my other family members have, and I am capable of stopping after 1 drink, I know that the potential is there, triggered by stress. I've teetered on the edge more than once in my life and I am always aware of the potential.

I get really annoyed when people who obviously don't get it are quick to say "you don't have a problem ... just do something to take your mind off of it and the cravings will go away". You see, when you have a problem with it, there is NO way to just "take your mind off of it". And if you have only had one drink in 2 months and it's no big deal to you ... then you obviously don't have any kind of problem with alcohol. That means you're coming at it from a completely different perspective than the person who *craves* it and can't stop thinking about it.

Please understand, none of us are trying to beat up on the OP. Most of us who are responding so strongly have seen lives harmed by problems with alcohol and/or have been there ourselves in some form. We are all hoping that she gets the support and help she needs to conqueror this before it becomes an even worse problem.

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All right--let's chill out here. None of us knows whether the OP is or is not an alcoholic. Only Stardog can decide that.

Stardog, if you can change your habits so you're not blowing, gosh, 400 calories or so on alcohol every day, then you'll do better with your weight loss program. That's about all you need to know. And if you can't change your habits, that's a different issue from weight loss.

I hope you succeed! Hang in there!

Jay

Hmmm, I can tell you guys have never been to a "mixer" hosted by a slot machine manufacturer It's a pretty unique environment where what you drink (and your knowledge of *adult beverages*) determines your *status* almost as much as what kind of car you drive, who you wear, or whether you know where to find Cuban cigars. "What are you drinking?" is probably THE most common conversation opener. And, I did admit to still using it as a crutch in social situations - except now I spend most of the evening carrying around the same drink.

Stardog Good luck! Be strong!

Jay