Body Image and Issues after Weight Loss Including discussions about excess skin and reconstructive surgery

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Old 11-04-2013, 04:12 PM   #1  
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Default People that didn't know u when u were overweight

Been a while since I last posted (and apparently I have two names here, the one I wanted to use, but lost the password is JessicaW). Anyway, July 2012 I went on a high protein diet and went from 210 lbs to 135 (it actually fluctuates between 130 and 140). I'm pretty happy where I'm at. My goal was originally 130 but I think I could stand to lose 5 more pounds.

Anyway, my problem is that I lived in Texas my whole life, and about halfway through my weightloss, I moved. I have just now started to get to know people around here and I'm not so crazy about the comments I get. The other day, a friend asked why I wasn't wearing a certain shirt, and I replied "because I would have had to put on pants that made me look 5 pounds lighter, that shirt is so tight" and another woman looked at me and said "oh please, are you really going to go there?"

I know that I may be small now, but I really don't feel like it, and that remark just didn't set right with me. I just laughed it off and said the shirt was so tight, she must have given me a youth medium instead of adult, I didn't know what else to say. Has anyone else dealt with comments like this?
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Old 11-04-2013, 06:39 PM   #2  
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Why not just tell her the reason....that you have just finished losing a lot of weight and you would like to get down to 130. Losing 75 lbs is a huge proud that you did it
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Old 11-04-2013, 08:05 PM   #3  
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I have done that with a few co workers, when they ask me why I always turn down the sugary junk food they offer. A couple of the responses have been okay, but some people made a huge deal out of, saying they couldn't believe it, I don't look like I have ever weighed that much, they want to see pictures of me when I was fat. I don't like the attention. While I'm proud of my accomplishment, I'm also ashamed that I let myself get to 210 pounds. Plus, the reaction I get to my diet (high protein low carb) is usually "you must be crazy to do that, I couldn't live without my bread."

I don't know. I'm a socially awkward person, and I need to learn appropriate responses to weight loss questions.
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Old 11-04-2013, 09:05 PM   #4  
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Been there, still going thru it. I get comments from people all the time when I tell them I was 248 way, did you have weight loss surgery etc. Also, the same comments about clothes, I'm still not comfortable with myself in clothes and still feel uneasy when I catch someone looking at me. I went from always being the largest person in any room I was in, to the lady that gets dirty looks from others when I squeeze between chairs in the breakroom trying to get by. I still am shocked at myself when I look. However, new people tell me my weight problem was in the past. They don't want to understand my feelings. People that I used to know often talk about me, ive heard several ladies having conversations sometimes they are down right mean. Like I'm trying to rub my weight loss in their face.
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Old 11-11-2013, 06:13 AM   #5  
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been there!
My friends (new friends) always comment on the salads or wraps I order when they having burgers and chips, or when the have coke I have water!
"but you so skinny, what you worried about?" or "eat what you want, you don't look as fat as me"
They don't get the huge sense of accomplishment I get when I eat healthy and feel good about avoiding temptation.
They didn't know me when I was fat so they don't understand the struggle I went through to get here and why I am fightning so hard not to go back there!
on the plus side my family are finally starting to support me!
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Old 11-13-2013, 02:54 PM   #6  
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Sounds l people be insensative no matter what the topic. You should be proud of yourselves
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Old 11-13-2013, 03:42 PM   #7  
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It sounds like you unintentionally invited the comment by calling attention to weight and pounds. Next time in that situation, just say it didn't fit you right and change the topic. But it sounds like her reply was meant to flatter, not annoy.
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Old 11-19-2013, 11:09 PM   #8  
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Sometimes people question why I eat frozen meals (WW, LC, ect) for lunch almost every day when many of my colleagues go out. If I want to invite the conversation I tell them that I button up my calories on the weekdays to splurge on the weekends. If I want to tell them to STFU, I just say that I'm a creature of habit. Really there is no right answer.

What I generally don't say is that I lost 110 lbs. Too many people will respond asking me if I had weight loss surgery and I just don't want to get into talking about my diet.
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Old 11-20-2013, 10:18 AM   #9  
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I can't spend my entire life being scared of making a comment that might lead to someone commenting on my weight (not saying that you are! this is something that I totally do). Sometimes people hunt for reasons to bring it up because it is on the forefront of their mind and its like playing a game of Minesweeper. Unless its something that I can't control (like a workplace) I tend to spend more time with people that don't take every opportunity to comment on what I eat or what I look like lol.

If its an uncontrollable thing, like the workplace, or its a good friend that occasionally makes a harmless comment - I just remind myself that it is something that some people, including myself, tend to be sensitive about so I don't beat myself up for feeling sensitive and I just use it an exercise for me to not get upset by any mention of weight.

Last edited by pixelllate; 11-20-2013 at 10:18 AM.
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