I didn't have time to read through everyones posts, but yours caught my eye Lynne.
I worry about this often, my fiance always told me he was attracted to chubby girls and that he did not like thin ones. I worry about this too, but I voice it to him and he says 'well don't worry, I'll let you know if you get so thin you are no longer appealing' What if I get to that weight and I'm happy and I wanna stay that way? I don't want to be unhealthy, I think 140 is a generous goal for my frame.
I don't really have much advice to offer but to let you know that your not alone out there. *hugs* I hope whatever happens, it works out the best for you!
(I've thought about getting a boob lift when I'm done losing weight, but that's for me! :3 )
Had a great conversation about everything this weekend. Turns out he has just been preoccupied with work and I was taking it personally. I guess it is good to remember, it is not always about you. He didn't even realize he had slighted me on my sprinting accomplishment (again, was on his way to work.) He let me know he was very proud of my fitness accomplishments and a little jealous that he cannot do the hardcore stuff I can do ( his bad back.) He said "I married you for you, not what you look like now or then, although the fact that you are hot is a bonus."
He also pointed out that we are very open with each other about everything and his boob fixation has never been an issue before. I just let him know it was making me feel inadequate and he said he wouldn't want me to get fake boobs unless I really wanted to, he would support me, but he prefers real ones, even if they are smaller.
I feel a lot better about everything and I think it helped to have the ears of others who can relate. Thank you again!
Last edited by LYNNEGAL22; 08-02-2010 at 11:53 AM.
There may also be a little jealousy involved. Maybe he is afraid that now that you are fit, other men might try to steal you away. My husband seems a little less trusting of other men than he used to be, and I'm not even close to fit yet!
Had a great conversation about everything this weekend. Turns out he has just been preoccupied with work and I was taking it personally. I guess it is good to remember, it is not always about you. He didn't even realize he had slighted me on my sprinting accomplishment (again, was on his way to work.) He let me know he was very proud of my fitness accomplishments and a little jealous that he cannot do the hardcore stuff I can do ( his bad back.) He said "I married you for you, not what you look like now or then, although the fact that you are hot is a bonus."
He also pointed out that we are very open with each other about everything and his boob fixation has never been an issue before. I just let him know it was making me feel inadequate and he said he wouldn't want me to get fake boobs unless I really wanted to, he would support me, but he prefers real ones, even if they are smaller.
I feel a lot better about everything and I think it helped to have the ears of others who can relate. Thank you again!
I couldnt help but "awwwwwww" over this. Im glad you and him talked about it. An you got the answers you needed.
I'm just starting my weight loss journey but I have a fear of this happening. My husband and I have been together for almost 3 years and in those 3 years I have talked about losing weight and he has said the same thing evertime "No! I love the way you look now!" I personally feel as if I look like a cow. I have horrble body image. I fear that once I lose the weight he won't find me attractive. This could be just my paranoia(sp?) but I feel that is is a legit concern.
Last edited by samanthahwrd91; 12-25-2012 at 06:38 PM.
I'm just starting my weight loss journey but I have a fear of this happening. My husband and I have been together for almost 3 years and in those 3 years I have talked about losing weight and he has said the same thing evertime "No! I love the way you look now!" I personally feel as if I look like a cow. I have horrble body image. I fear that once I lose the weight he won't find me attractive. This could be just my paranoia(sp?) but I feel that is is a legit concern.
If your husband were to face facts he would understand that for a woman of 5'2" over 300 pounds is not healthy. Good luck with your diet maybe you can show him some literature showing rhe dangers of being overweight.
My husband used to tell me he liked heavier woman and would tell me not to lose weight. Come to find out, he just told me that because he didn't want me to feel bad about being heavy. And at first he wouldn't tell me he liked the way I looked after losing all the weight, because he was afraid I could gain the weight back. So, he figured the best bet was to keep his mouth shut. Lol. He loves me big or small. But, he likes me at a lower weight because I'm healthier and more active.
Everyone likes different things. My bf/hubby likes heavier girls too cause its all hes known. But he is adjusting to me getting smaller and smaller and appreciating the things we can do now :P but some guys just like one body type. Has for fake boobs, get them if you want them for you. Obviously we all like to look good for our men/women but at the same time its a major procedure so get it for you. I am getting my boobs done when I'm at goal weight. I'm a HH cup now and they will need a lift at goal weight. If by some miracle they are below a D at goal I will be getting fake ones. But thats for me cause Ive always had large ones and to be a small cup like a C would feel like I had none at all, like I was missing a limb, you know? But anyways sweetheart do whats best for you and I hope he will appreciate how gorgeous I bet you are Update: glad it all worked out in the end.
Last edited by CherryQuinn; 12-30-2012 at 02:45 PM.
As nelie said - insecurity. I had a similar story with my husband. After my weight loss he became so distant and we went through some rough times in a relationship. I was thinking he did not like the new me, but as it turned out he found me so pretty that he felt I would not be interested in him anymore. he was very insecure that he is not a "match" for me anymore. It is counseling that helped him to reveal those feelings! Now that we worked through it we are happier then ever!
Im glad you and him talked about it. An you got the answers you needed.
