Rachel, best wishes with your presentation today! Great that you've accomplished an master grocery list. I'd like to do that, too. If I write it on my notepad it keeps cycling through my thought processes until I finally do it.

Yesterday afterwork/pre-dinner DH decided he needed something in the shop. I grabbed my timer and duster. Amazing, in 5 minutes I had dusted the entire TV room (lightly) which FL says can be enough. credit. Today is a day off and I'm going to go finish painting this morning so we can move our bedroom upstairs. Observing....everything stayed pretty organized during this work week.

I added two new habits which seem to be helping;
1. hang up fleece jacket between uses. It's my in/out coat and previously it ended up wherever I felt like taking it off. When I wanted to go outside this morning I found it in my closet in the dark.
2. Keys/sunglasses/wallet in newly cleaned out drawer. It has simplified because when I want to leave those items are all in one place.

Getting ready to make a few moves
 

Hello!

Okay, so... here's where I am at.
I weighed in today *credit* and it's the beginning of my new week. Even though I feel in it to the limit I also discovered something that has made me feel SUPER-hopeful.

On the kijiji website, where people buy and sell stuff, I decided to see if I could find any cheap furniture and here's something for instance that intrigued me:

http://toronto.kijiji.ca/c-buy-and-s...AdIdZ406017451

So. This blue leather couch is FREE. Free. I can afford free. Of course I need to round up a mover but you know, I will be able to get this house in order sooner than I thought if stuff like that continues to show up online and I don't know why it wouldn't. It's added incentive to focus on my clean up and the general re-ordering of this apartment.

The other thing is I had the little talk with DH about him leaving his dirty dishes in the sink-dishes he hasn't scraped but has turned the water on so they soak. ICK. He was *meh* about my request, looking at me like what's the big deal, but he's not the one doing the dishes is he? Nooooooo. But this morning his breakfast plate was on the counter. So credit I suppose. But I felt, "less than", like ... and these are my thoughts that flood me... ...and then it just feels impossible. I need to take a break from everything else and just bingework on the house like you guys mentioned. I think I am setting next week aside for that. I want to go into September feeling like something significant has changed in terms of decluttering.

And I'll end this up and down post on a positive note. We have discovered two meals we both like and can both eat and I am going to automate the food plans for us so we can budget better and I can cook or even prepare and freeze meals ahead of time. It's a lot of work in the beginning but it will be so worth it when I need to keep doing whatever it is I am doing and don't have to stop to make breakfast or dinner.

You know, I never did make my master plan and I'm going to do that this evening. I finished 6 paintings today and have 3 more 1/2 done. When they are done that's it for today for my work and I will focus on me and the house.

Thanks again for your support. Bye for now.

Lexxiss a few posts back you mentioned that you had a thought for me about ordering stuff... love to hear it!

Hello!

onebyone, that couch looks nice. Were you able to contact someone about it?

I must admit that FL's 5 minute swiff and 15 min. declutter every day REALLY moves me forward very quickly. In the past two days I have used my timer with both tasks and SEE the difference. credit. I do both in the morning acknowledging that I won't do it later.

Yesterday I struggled through the paint job in the bedroom but finished it. credit. I desperately wanted to walk away from it even though I had less than 1/2 hour to go. Distraction technique: music. I put my favorite music on and it worked magic. I had to think this morning...what was my issue? It was that I wanted to be moving the bed back upstairs instead of painting in preparation. Aha, back to "12 step" program basics, "First things first".

Today, I may, :crossed: have the day at home. I try to keep moving forward with baby steps so today I will:
~ take a pile of blankets/towels and several no longer used cat boxes to the shelter.
~fill (at least) one box and take to the thrift store.
~move the bed back upstairs
~fix a freestanding mirror that has been broken for (at least) a year
~take lawn chairs out of car (from 3 week ago event) and put away in basement

OK, DH is still sleeping IN the bed I want to move. I will try to move forward on other things.

OneonOne: Hope the inspiration of the new couch helps you to make your home exactly how you want it. Good job on your tea room paintings. Do you freelance each week or do you have a set day to prepare and sell your paintings?

Lexxiss: Roll Tide Girl! I am getting behind your momentum today. I have set my timer to get the house back to "normal clean" and then will start on front living room with work boxes. I taught on Anxiety yesterday and the rupture of connection. When we have a "rupture" we create desire (needs/wants) that we try to fill with voids ...foods..... stuff ect....(Pick your filler). When we get grounded back with Self and become present to what is in the now, we decrease anxiety.....All that said, I am finding joy with taking care of what I have. Joy with being home-doing what I am supposed to do. Joy-connecting with what is given to me and holding gently thoughts that might try to derail my tasks at hand.

Accepting what is going to get me to my goals .....peaceful, organized space and not letting "emotional avoidance" derail my goals just because " I don't feel like it".

Happy Friday to all.

onebyone, :df:


As I painted baseboards in the bedroom the other day I remembered that it used to be difficult to find the floor. I had to find the floor before I could paint. (First things first). When I said I was thinking of you, I was thinking of your frustration with the stacks of dishes. I thought, "this is a very discouraging chore, because it just keeps stacking up." My thought was that it might be far more encouraging to focus on some major movement of "stuff"...items that would not keep stacking up again every day like the dishes do. That way, you would have progress that you could see every day, even when there WAS a stack of dishes. (Then you mentioned binge-painting which I thought could turn into binge-sorting)


I really think if you would set aside a week for bingework that your progress by the end of week 1 would be very invigorating.

We do this alot and I find it has helped free up so much time. Occasionally I'll ask DH, "are you still liking tostadas and healthy pizza?" "Oh, yeah!" He says, so I continue. When we tire of one or two of the choices I find something new and OP to automate. PS. It also helps w/keeping the kitchen clean.

How is that coming? I find I need two master plans; :write:
1. What I want my space to be like after I'm done
2. How I am going to best accomplish it


I've been reading P. Walsh again and this paragraph really seemed to summarize the entire process quite well. Peter says,

"What I tell people is simple: You can't fit five cubic reet of stuff into three cubic feet of space. You only have the space you have. If you only bring things into your home and don't take anything out, sooner or later you will have no room. If you don't use, love, and honor something it has no place in your home. Just because someone gave you something doesn't mean you have to keep it. You must respect the limits of the physical space that you have, because if you don't the space can't function and your vision is lost."

ETA-What I liked about this statement was that it was like the "law of physics" AND that it left all the emotion out of the equation....why did I do this....why can't I do this....when will I do this....that chatter was gone. In my mind it got replaced with the new fact, "I have too much...I need to let go now so my space can function and my vision isn't lost. Period."

So, onebyone, I've been thinking it could really be helpful for you to develop a "plan" which could maximize the most space with the least amount of emotional effort. It could be called "the dance" (from FL), which is 1-2-3, 1-2-3 :dancer:
1. let go of "trash", items which don't have another life
2. cut your paper piles in 1/2 by only sorting out recyclable paper, with no focus on organization of stuff you want to keep
3. VIA a "plan"-going through all your clothes (1.keep 2.donate 3. throw away)

Questions:
If you set aside a week, could you take DH to work so you could have use of the car? Would this help the process?

Have you located the thrift stores where you could drop items daily?

What is your recycle situation? Do you have lots of paper that could move out quickly?

What is your "clothes" situation? Do you feel you have to wash everything you're going to donate?

What is your "trash" situation? Do you feel you have lots of stuff that just doesn't have another "life", and if so, can your dumpster handle it or do you need to come up with alternate disposal?

Do you have items that could just be set by the dumpster as freebies? (BBE turned me onto this as he set stuff at the curb. I am amazed at how fast stuff disappears-it's acually fun!)

The reason I asked those questions is because I find it much easier to move stuff when I have the plan for the final outcome. I find it doesn't help me much to sort through all the clothes if I just pile them somewhere else. The final move from the house to the car/trash is what I call "exercise". I also find I don't obsess with eating while I'm accomplishing these tasks.

Anyway....just food for thought. I am always remembering that this is your process. Some ideas that worked for me may not work for you. We are all unique and have different visions. However, I do believe that what we have in common is the acknowledgement that we have too much stuff in too little space and we wish to make progress forward.

:cheer: Cheering you on!

:bravo: Good Post! Lots of great questions!

Rachel, it's Friday...so I was expecting you. Now you've got me motivated to "put my shoes on", get my timer and do my 5 and 15. Let me know what new inspiration you have. I wish I could have been at your presentation....sounds right down my alley!

BTW-I mentioned music as a motivator. I shifted some tunes on my ipod calling them "cleaning/inspirational". It really helps me accomplish my projects faster.

Lexxiss: I pulled out my IPOD and completed the cleaning, laundry and grocery shopping done. I would have loved to have you in the meeting. We teach psychological flexibility for the mind. Wanted everyone to know where anxiety originates from and we all suffer from it from time to time.

We are finally going to get a big rain tomorrow. I may work on my son's walk in closet that is full of lots of stuff that has been ignored for a long time. As Peter Walsh might say...Does the clutter in it make my butt look big? The answer is yes, it is quite overweight. !!

I checked most off my list...the bed is upstairs anyway. I was finished by noon and I was happy once I said "enough". I must admit that the "durings" are not always my favorite and so when I start to wither I put on music and find a stopping point. Today it was putting away my tools and then picking up in the office...putting away my laundry. It did feel good to "finish" my work in the bedroom for the week, since FL chores are very light during the weekend. There were a few things that weren't perfect yet I already remembered I'd revisit this zone again in about a month....

I'll move the dining room table out of the living room tomorrow. I need to be to work at 530am.

onebyone, best wishes for your market day!

Sunday and the week ahead
 

Hello!

I'm focused on the clean up this week in my apartment.
Workwise, I have only one long on-going project to do, no other deadlines that I can recall (yikes). I believe this is a good week to spend the majority of my time cleaning up and clearing out. My motivation is the new furniture I now know we can afford. I mentioned my discovery to DH re:cheap funiture people are getting rid of and he, right away, mentioned a friend at work with a truck, as in "I wonder if he would help us if I bought him a case of beer?". So, in this very concrete way I know DH is "in". This is good.

Lexxiss How can I possibly thank you for the well written organized (not cluttered!) post you wrote about questions to ask as I make my plan for my clean up? Thank you. I will print it out and as I follow it, and answer it, I know my own plan will form. I appreciate the thought and energy you sent my way by setting that down here in cyberspace (does anyone call this internet thing that anymore I wonder??)

helpingrachel Your talk sounded fascinating to me as well. I spent a good chunk of my late teens to early 20's coming down from full blown agoraphobia to a functioning whole human being on my own. I truly know and understand the levels of fear and anxiety one can experience and how much of an illusion they are when challenged! Anyone out there helping anyone else deal with this stuff has my greatest respect and support! I laughed too as I read I find the visuals in that sentence hilarious for some reason this morning. I cannot imagine how big my butt is right now!!! Funny.

Time to go. Have to get on with things. I may start to formulate that plan with step one: clear off the white board of all the other to-do lists that have come and gone!!

Bye!

Onebyone: I am here to support you and encourage the process of change. I understand the frustration, lack of focus and need for others that are working a plan with like minded goals. I may take a picture of my office to let you know my biggest disaster area. I sit in my clean and organized dining room to write or create power points. I am ok with the creative mess there but know that I can create a better organized space one day. Just a space at a time, daily upkeep and new progress as it fits in the overall plan.

Thanks for laughing at my joke. About the space being overweight, it is true. I chuckled about that as well.


Lexxiss: Could you share with me your smoothie recipe? I am going to switch over to a go green smoothie for my morning meal. I am researching recipes and looking for a mixer or I may use my current blender to see if It will hold up. I have to start tasting a few before I invest any extra money if I am to buy a good one.

Hello!

onebyone, great news that your DH is supportive of your furniture acquisition! Also great that it's helping inspire you on your week ahead! BTW-I forgot to mention I found two donation centers in Denver with buff guys who empty out my vehicle...I don't even need to get out of the car. It is sometimes really helpful to me knowing all I have to do is get stuff in the car.

Rachel, I wish I had any "before" pictures. Sometimes now it is hard for me to remember how it used to be.
Smoothies: Mine has developed over time and could probably be "more tasty" but it works for me. I don't like eating/fixing breakfast and so nutrition and carrying me through are most important. I use a vitamix and make for 2.
~apple and 1 other fruit (or berries)
~ginger root
~carrot
~kale
~cucumber
~beet
~non soy protein powder
~greens powder

I made small progress forward, although I'm really trying to remember FL encourages slowing down on the weekend. With my work schedule I don't really have a weekend, anyway. I got the dining room table moved back which made me happy. Today will be maintenance as I work.

Lexxiss: :p:D;) Vitamix envy! I was planning on similar ingredients and loved to see that you were using non-soy powder. (thyroid) I have some choices on the green powder to add from my nutrition store. I am ready for a change and more importantly energy. I am planning on increasing my alkaline veggies. Your shake is loaded with them, good for the inside and out!

I am in need of basis upkeep after a busy workday or weekend. I am doing laundry and a fly by of picking each room up. No big mopping or vacuuming as I did that on Friday.

Working on a presentation on committed action and values. Here is the quote that I am using...."The journey between what you once were and who you are now is where the dance of Life really takes you. -B.
DeAngelis I am pretty sure this is where our 1-2-3 Dance of Life comes in.

We don't always need pictures as we have that in our life stories and if the change matters, we know where we came from. Look at your weight loss! I have changed in my life more in the past 10 years, when I began to really focus on what was/is important to me. Just because I have something "cue" up in my head, doesn't mean I have to believe it. I like the quote, don't believe everything you think"! Giving myself space and shifting to "my observing self" helps me to see the big picture and what is "workable" for me. That movement is the very thing that gets me going and moving toward what is functionally important.

OneonOne: Wishing you a great week with loving action toward what is needed to manifest in your life. You are one creative being! I love your pictures that you posted on the other thread.

Blessings on your Monday!

Claiming My Space *Intensive* Week: day 1
 

Hi!

Already noon, and I need to have lunch before I launch into my project for the day: assembling the Martha Stewart 16 cube shelving unit in the lviing room.

ARC for this project:

1. This shelf will go a long way to "normalizing" the view from the outside of my apartment into my space. This is important as the landlord walks by my window several times a week and I like curtains open and I do not want hassles from him re: condition of the apartment. That's a BIG motivator believe it or not. People regularily look into my place. It always feels embarassing and/or shameful and I no longer need this in my life. Some days I don't care but the feeling always returns. I don't want to worry about it anymore. This is sooooooooo similar to carrying extra weight on the body and being in public! The feelings of being judged. Very similar indeed.

2. more storage space for my stuff

3. another cleared out area

4. slowly giving my apartment a bit of style

5. accomplishing another task off my to-do list

6. taking charge of my space

7. taking action

8. surprising DH when he gets home

9. creating a clean calm space

10. actively working toward my winter oasis

I've attached 3 jpgs for you: the space as it looks now (my before), the box with the shelf to be assembled, and my to do list: full of the baby steps to get this job done today.

Will update with photos and text later today.

update - picture worth 1000 words
 

Update: posted an after/in process image of my space, cleaned and ready for the shelf. Now to tackle maing the beast.

Update #2 - 2 hours later - I am ready to throw that &!@#ing thing in the trash. OMG I HATE THIS DESIGN!!!!! Every little shelf is attached to the vertical panels with those little pegs and then there are these lock things that lock in metal bolts and some reach, some don't. Some wooden pegs go deep into the shelf holes and don't hold the shelf up at all, some won't go in at all and TWO BROKE OFF! On top of this, when you attach one shelf, ALL the others shift and lose their place and if you push them all in tight then there isn't enough leeway to get the next shelf in until you pull it apart a bit and then all the shelves come out of alignment again. Such a STUPID design.

I especially hate it cause everything is all over and I am super-frustrated and then DH will come home and put it together and then he'll get the satsifaction of having assembled it, not me. ARGH. He's definitely going to shoo me away as I am so fed up with the thing.

Ok. I'm just watching a soap for a half an hour. Will try again after once I calm down.

update#3 I am no further along with this stupid shelving unit. I give up. Hoepfully Dh can wrestle it into submission. 6 hours and counting for this thing...

update#4 a mere 8 hours later, and it's done. what a piece of crap design it is, but it still looks nice and clean up. DH, as I said, had to rescue me on it but really we both had to work together to get it made. And you can't use their instructions at all., except for what piece goes where. the actual construction cannot be completed the way the instructions are written.

Martha Stewart, :nono: shame on you for putting your name on this product, and if you actually designed it like that, no wonder you were incarcerated. :rollpin:

Only two more items on my to do list for today: a sinkful of dishes and clean up around the left side of the futon. Off to finish up.