Do daughters cause divorce? - 3 Fat Chicks on a Diet Weight Loss Community

Jillegal · 10-03-2003, 12:31 PM

I know this isn't directly related to weight-loss (but we can talk about things other than that, right?). Actually, given the self-esteem issues many females face, which is acknoweldged as a risk factor to obesity, articles of this nature could be very enlightening.

Any comments?

http://slate.msn.com/id/2089142/

rochemist · 10-03-2003, 01:03 PM

I think their stats are BS. 5% of what? My sisters 1st hubby told her he left her cause she had a girl, the truth was he was an irresponsible *** not ready for the full breadth of fatherhood. People cause divorce not children.

Miss Chris

Jillegal · 10-03-2003, 01:17 PM

Speaking from personal experience, I'll never forget the look of disappointment on my ex's face when our beautiful daughter was born. Eight years later, during the divorce proceedings, he mentioned that if I were to re-marry he'd let the "new father" adopt her. I just thought he was an exceptionally uncaring father. I know his actions caused my daughter great emotional suffering (they have no contact now and he wasn't invited to her wedding).

I know my divorce wasn't a result of having a daughter - there were multitudes of reasons why it was doomed to fail - but I believe he would have kept up contact and would have been less likely to offer to give up his parental rights if she had been a boy. She was and is better off without him in the long run, but the pain lingers.

Sheila53 · 10-03-2003, 01:52 PM

My ex could care less about his two sons, and didn't stop parental termination by his other ex for his youngest son. I think some men are just not ready for the responsibility of fatherhood and will use any excuse to bail, the more hurtful the better.

slimmingsi · 10-03-2003, 02:20 PM

kids should not be used as either weapons and or reasons for the break down in a relationship. its down to the two "adults" involved and women can be just as bad as men

SuchAPrettyFace · 10-03-2003, 03:24 PM

I think some guys use the excuse that if the child had been a boy, they would have been happier and/or tried harder. But the truth is, as someone else pointed out, they'd be crappy fathers no matter what.

Goddess Jessica · 10-03-2003, 04:21 PM

Perhaps husbands try harder with sons and are more involved in their child's lives if it's a boy.

Frankly, correlation does not prove causation.

Funny this should come up, I'm not planning to have any children but I did ask the Cute Boyfriend, if we ever had a kid, would you want a girl or a boy? His response, "Don't you think we'll be putting enough pressure on our kid without the pressure of 'I wish you were a boy' or "I wish you were a girl?" WOW! I was impressed. Especially since I would only want a girl.

anagram · 10-03-2003, 09:04 PM

The statistics may well be true but, if so, represents some immature people who might not have worked out well either way.

My firstborn is a girl and her father was thrilled and enamored with her though he admitted he had never thought he'd have anything but a boy - he's one of three boys and it had been a while since there had been a girl in his father's line. She's a lot more him in all sorts of ways than our son is but he and our son get along well too.

For statistical purposes, we'll celebrate our 45th anniversary tomorrow. So having a daughter sure didn't cause a problem here. Said daughter also has two daughters and doesn't seem to have caused her any problems either.