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Old 05-02-2008, 12:29 AM   #1  
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Default Kitty dilemma

Some of you may remember that my cat passed away almost two weeks ago. She was a beautiful young tortoiseshell cat that we've had for two years (adopting her as a two year old from a shelter). She had a heart attack, the vet concluded she had been born with a heart defect.

She was an amazing little, people-addicted cat. My husband and I have been talking about getting a new cat. The house just seems so empty. We went to see some shelter cats at the Petsmart and I got to play with some of the cats up for adoption. It was nice to have some cat-time, but I'm not sure I'm ready for another cat yet. Though I'm definitely feeling the pull.

I've always loved tortoise-shell and tortie and white cats (technically just another name for calico, but I think of calico cats as having a white base coat rather than black). I've always heard that the torties and calicos have feisty or eccentric personalities, and it was definitely true of the three I've had in my life. Although each had very different personalities they were all Sinatra kitties (they did it their way).

I really wanted a tortie or calico again, and there is an absolutely darling little tortie at one our local animal shelters, but she's almost a clone of our kitty that just died, except her eyes are a different color (much brighter yellow). I've only seen her photo - I haven't "met" her yet, and I was wondering if anyone had any experience with owning a cat (or dog) that was the spitting image of a dear departed pet. Did it make it harder or easier, or do you think it didn't matter.

Last edited by kaplods; 05-02-2008 at 12:31 AM.
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Old 05-02-2008, 12:51 AM   #2  
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I tend to go for the kitten that I am "drawn" to - they don't always look like one I have had in the past.

I don't know...I just think a connection is made when you find the right cat - you're theirs and they're yours. It's definitely a bond.

Wait until you've met this little girl and then make the decision. You will know at once whether she is the one you're meant to take home.

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Old 05-02-2008, 03:58 AM   #3  
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Not exactly, but I can tell you that on the evening of the day our corgi died of the same thing as your cat, my uncle turned up at the door with a tiny corgi puppy. My mum had been in a mess all day and I'm sure wasn't even thinking about getting another corgi (we had a GSD also at that time). But the puppy was so adorable and needed attention straight away, and it was just the best thing he could've done. 10 1/2 years later 'Dewi' is still with us, a lovely, comic old boy who has just fathered a litter on our female. I say go for it. The new kitten will be unique and special in her own way and will fill your house again.
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Old 05-02-2008, 07:31 AM   #4  
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I've lost a couple of cats in the past year for different reasons and I think it's a good idea to get another one fairly soon. Jazz, the oldest one, had diabetes and finally suffered a major stroke. Freckle was just a kitten and unfortuntely had one too many arguments with a plastic bag. His death was harder to cope with than the passing of Jazz.

Anyway . . . my point is this . . . I did replace Jazz with a new cat and would have gotten another one just like him If I could have found one -- he was pure black and just a domestic short-hair. I ended up with Blizzard who is the complete opposite in appearance since he is white; but quite similar in temperament. He is very cuddly and has helped me get over Jazz more easily, I think.

BTW . . . that's my calico, Purrecious, staring out at you from my avatar -- I love her deep golden/orange eyes.

Last edited by meowee; 05-02-2008 at 07:32 AM. Reason: too bad my fingers are not working this morning.
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Old 05-02-2008, 01:24 PM   #5  
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Purrecious is so pretty. I love the orange diamond on her face.

Thanks to you both for really making me feel better. My husband and I have decided that we will make our decision as much on the cat choosing us, as us choosing her/him. We want to make sure we get the right cat.

We do have one prospect. It's an orange tom, about two years old, named Rusty. He enjoyed meeting us right away (take me hooooome), and was crawling all over us, head butting hugs and rubbing his face in my husband's beard. We still need our landlord to write the letter allowing us to have a cat to turn in with our adoption application.

We're going to the county humane society and meet some kitties there and we'll make our decision. I am confident that the right cat will choose us.

There was a lovely dark calico polydactyl at the Petsmart. They had just gotten her in from a humane society nearly an hour away. I'm not sure if the road trip had put her in a dark mood, or if she just wasn't impressed with us, because she darted back through the door of the visiting room to get back to her cage. Her "bio" also said she didn't like other cats, so it also might have been Rusty's scent on us that riled her. We might try to visit with her first on our second visit, and see if that changes her opinion of us. She's gorgeous, but I'll have to give her a big sniff test, before considering her (I'm allergic to some cats, but not others. This may seem weird, but I have to bury my face in their fur and sniff to see if I'm allergic. If my eyes and nose don't itch and water, I'm ok. I usually have the most problem with long-haired cats).

I have to say that the prospect of another cat is raising my spirits. The two weeks without Girly Girl have seemed like an eternity. Hubby and I still catch ourselves in cat habits. I dropped a pill on the floor and made a mad dash to pick it up, before realizing there wasn't a rush. Hubby thought of kitty when choosing his cereal (unless it was flavored with cinnamon, she loved to sit and stare at him while he ate breakfast, patiently waiting to lick the empty bowl).

Yes, it will be very good to have a cat again.
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Old 05-02-2008, 01:57 PM   #6  
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No..I dont think I could ever own another pet that looked like one of my departed friends. That would just be too hard. I love ALL types of cats, and would love to have all sorts of different breeds.


Thats great that you'll be getting another kitty!!
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Old 05-02-2008, 03:10 PM   #7  
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That's really my dilemma. Whether such a twin would just be too much of a reminder. I'm partial to torties and calicos more for the unique personality traits they're known for, than for their appearance. Though I do enjoy having a cat with a unique appearance, personality is the main consideration.

Rusty, the orange tom we met at Petsmart, is a prime example. While he's beautifully marked, he's a bit of a plain jane (or john). His personality, though, makes him a real star. If we would have had the landlord's letter in hand, I think we would have taken him home, then and there. I'm trying not to get my heart set on him though, as he is so charming, there's a good chance he will go home with someone else before we get our letter. I'm also a little concerned that the previous owners gave him away for being too rambunctions and spraying. The rambunctiousness isn't a problem, as we're home all day to be amused by him, but if he sprays, the landlord won't let us keep him. Although, since he has been neutered, and neither my husband nor I have ever had a neutered cat spray, we do wonder if they made up or exagerated it as an excuse for getting rid of him - or whether there were other things going on in the house that made him feel it necessary to mark his territory.

In a sense, I think I'm borrowing trouble.I'm just worried that if I do fall in love with the personality of the little tortie that looks like my previous cat, she'll never live up to expectations I may not even know I have. I guess the chances are probably slim that she will turn out to be "the one" so I may be worrying over nothing.

Our last cat definitely chose us, not the other way around. She flopped down on her back for belly rubs and rubbed her head against us and purred. We knew she was our cat (or rather she had clearly selected us as her people).

We've decided that we'll take the cat that clearly picks us, no matter what he or she looks like. Rusty definitely picked us, so I'm really partial to him (but like I said, afraid to get my hopes up, in case we can't choose him). Also, he definitely had a distinct preference for my husband, and I was clearly second fiddle. I have to admit I was a little bit jealous. If we meet a cat that thinks we're BOTH the best thing since catnip, I guess that would maybe give that cat an edge over Rusty. (but, gosh I can't help but hope he's still there when we get our letter).

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Old 05-02-2008, 03:24 PM   #8  
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A good friend of mine lost his dog... while he and his partner were in London It was just a nightmare for him. The dog he had was a more rare breed. When his dog passed, he waited a couple of months and did get a puppy that looks like his old dog. I don't think there is anything wrong with it because pets have such distinct personalities and I bet you will most likely see this new kitty individually, even if it's friendly like your other one was. I know that bringing his new puppy into his life proved to be very good for my friend.

Also, I'm really sorry for your loss. It's never easy to say goodbye to a pet and I imagine it's even harder when it is sudden and they are young.
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Old 05-02-2008, 03:26 PM   #9  
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Also, I LOVE calicos and torties myself, although I have had a tabby for 10 years. I've loved calicos in particular since I was a little girl.
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Old 05-02-2008, 03:48 PM   #10  
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I love the red tabbies (like Rusty) too. I definitely think you are right to pick by personality rather than appearance and that's one reason to choose an older cat as well. In general, the males are usually more affectionate than the females but not always.

Good Luck with whatever cat chooses you . . .
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Old 05-02-2008, 03:49 PM   #11  
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It is crazy tough with her being so young, and the death being so unexpected. Sometimes I still can't believe it has happened. As much as I loved the maltese my parents had (much of the time, I was living with them and going to college and graduate school), we were well prepared for his death. He was old and suffering, so they had to have him put to sleep. It was hard, but we all had plenty of time to adjust and say goodbye.


I feel almost like God stole my cat (I know better, but feelings are crazy).

As for torties and calicos, I fell in love with their appearance when I was maybe 13 or 14. I was a paper girl and a very handsome customer on my route had a brindled tortie. He was a college professor and told me that all calicos and torties are female except for very rarely a sterile male, I had such a crush on him and thought he was so sophisticated.

My first cat was a patched tortie with white blazes on her belly and chest. I really didn't believe all I'd heard about the tortie personality until I had her, and it was only confirmed with the other two torties in my life. My husband had an elderly dilute tortie persian when I met him - and boy was she a spitfire. David said he knew I was "the one" when Grace accepted me (he would actually tell her to "pet" me and she would). Though when we married, Grace did pee at the foot of my bed to show me who was alpha female (David said it still showed that she liked me, because she had pooped on a former fiance's pillow).
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Old 05-02-2008, 03:58 PM   #12  
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Purrecious is AKA "The Flying Squirrel" . . . she is sooooooo busy all the time. She is also the official door opener for all the rest -- kitchen cupboards, closet bifolds, nothing is safe. The others sit patiently in a row while she works on the door and then they all streak inside to see what trouble they can get into. Her most recent trick involves getting my dresser drawers open -- I'd swear she grows opposable thumbs every night; but when I check, she still only has the usual number on each foot (not polydactyl).
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Old 05-02-2008, 04:17 PM   #13  
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I do swear the tortie/calicos are smarter than the average cat (and other cats seem to know this, in a house of multiple cats, it always seems the tortie/calico is the obvious king/queen).

Our Girly Girl knew that the deadbolt was vital in opening the apartment door. Unfortunately for her, and fortunately for us, without opposable thumbs and the abilty to turn the deadbolt in one paw and the doorknob with the other, she was never able to open the door, but it didn't stop her from trying. As I said, she knew from watching us that the deadbolt had to be turned, which was too heavy for her to manage, but she would bat at it, and then bat at the door handle. The style of door handle, if there hadn't been a deadbolt, she very likely would have figured out how to open the door.

Our medicine cabinets are on spring latches, and one of her favorite past-times was to push (actually bounce) on the doors shut/open/shut/open/shut/open. The funniest part was that she wasn't after what was inside (she explored them the first time she discovered how to open them), she just liked the clickety clack sound that bouncing on them made. It was also her strategy to try to wake us to get a drink of water.
(We would turn on the sink for her if she "asked" with a meow during the day, but at night, she'd only get a drink if she "asked" when one of us had already gotten up to use the bathroom). The clickety sound was quiet enough that it would wake us without us realizing what had woken us, it took us a while to realize that she had sneakily trained us.
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Old 05-02-2008, 04:22 PM   #14  
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I am a cat lover, I have been bringing kittens home since I was three and I have always grown with cats. When my first cat died it took me 4 years to have another cat (we got a parrot in the meantime). Later we had a small kitten, who for a weird reason decided to leave (I am saying that because she never returned) after the birth of my second great love Tiger. Tiger was a HUGE cat in size (and I don't mean fat, I mean HUGE) that was the most caring male we ever had and also had quite the human qualities. He got himself a female mate and never mated with another one and was very affectionate with the kittens ( tried to teach them how to climb the stairs and got angry when they were going near the edge and pretended not to hear him). He died in a really old age (14) and he was very sick, something that makes him irreplaceable to our heart. We now have his last offspring (his mate and him always had beautiful kittens so it was never trouble finding families for them), a female, sterilized calico beauty called Patchwork that is affectionate like her father.

My greatest wish is for you to find a charmer like we did. I think pets ar special so buy one you will have chemistry with, though you never know with kittens (Patchwork's brother Mirivillis was a very cute and affectionate baby when a kitten but after his first mating, he turned aggressive and does not want to be in the house. He also hates cuddling now and only comes home to eat.) Good luck with your pet selection! :
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Old 05-02-2008, 04:27 PM   #15  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kaplods View Post
I do swear the tortie/calicos are smarter than the average cat (and other cats seem to know this, in a house of multiple cats, it always seems the tortie/calico is the obvious king/queen).

Our medicine cabinets are on spring latches, and one of her favorite past-times was to push (actually bounce) on the doors shut/open/shut/open/shut/open. The funniest part was that she wasn't after what was inside (she explored them the first time she discovered how to open them), she just liked the clickety clack sound that bouncing on them made. It was also her strategy to try to wake us to get a drink of water.
(We would turn on the sink for her if she "asked" with a meow during the day, but at night, she'd only get a drink if she "asked" when one of us had already gotten up to use the bathroom). The clickety sound was quiet enough that it would wake us without us realizing what had woken us, it took us a while to realize that she had sneakily trained us.
Lol mine, found out how to open the box I put my hair bands in, so she could steal them and hide them. We were wondering how my hair bands were disappearing until we caught her in the act of stealing them. I, now put the old ones I do not want there, so she can take them and play. Funny thing is, that she checks the corridor to see I am not coming, before opening the box.
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