Ginya sweetie, you are AMAZING!! I'm so impressed with your efforts. I feel pitiful beside you. Always be proud of how far you've come. You are truly an inspiration. I hope that we have enough support to offer you.
love and hugs,
Ellis

I have thought about this because I've been at my WW goal weight for so long that I don't even really "try" to go any lower. I've been saying for at least a year that I want to be 68KG (because it's approx 150 lbs and that "sounds" like a nice number), yet I'm not doing a lot to reach that - I'm currently at 70 KG (or 154 ish lbs).

154 is nearly the top of my weight range according to WW. I am 5'6" pear-shaped and "medium" boned. I feel good like this and although I do have a larger patootie than others I don't really care. What I care about is my stomach sticking out. I too have had no children but it looks like I have previously.

I could not even imagine myself smaller than 150. I know that I have weighed less than 150 but it was many, many moons ago and it was "natural" (ie I didn't crash diet to get there). I've "dieted" twice in my life - both times WW and this last time I reached my goal and stuck with it. At the age of 34, I honestly don't think it's realistic for me to be any less than 150. I'm healthy, I work out a lot and I try to do the right thing for my body. I don't want to be a number, though as I say that I don't know why I would then choose 150 as my goal.

I think it's important to remember here that while, yes, we all want to lose weight and be healthy, fitter individuals, we are not just a number on the scale. What if you do reach that magical number? Then what? Will you be happy? What about after the lifts and tucks and nips (don't get me wrong, I fantasize DAILY about getting liposuction and a boob lift!), then will you be happy? What if you are not? Will you go even lower until you are? What if you never are?

I'm terrified actually of wanting more (or should I say "less") than a 150 lb goal. I know I can be obsessive at times and have been during my journey on WW. That's why I have made mistakes with myself (like not having any alcohol for so long and then deciding AFTER I reached goal that I was going to drink again... only to drink like there was no tomorrow and consequently gain 7 KG back in a short period of time!) and that's probably why I don't try that hard to lose 2 stinking kilos. I just simply want to be HAPPY with myself! Imperfections and all! I will never be a stick figure! I will not be what I weighed 20 years ago, it's not realistic or even possible. Numbers mean jack, really! I want to break free of the numbers rat race!

Don't you?

(like it would ever happen since I count points all the time as well! Numbers are my life!)

Quite honestly, if I don't pay attention to the numbers, I gain weight. It would probably be nice to not have to worry, but my not worrying and just wanting to be happy kind of led me to where I am now weight-wise. I do agree with you that this can become an obsession, and I've been there, and no, that's not healthy. But when you use numbers as a guide to gauge your relative healthy weight, as a tangible goal to reach, then I don't think that's a bad thing. As far as not ever being happy? Well then, come over to my couch and lets chat....

That has a lot more behind it than just weight and numbers.

Don't get me wrong Raven, I also HAVE to pay attention to the numbers. Being a "maintainer" I was checking my weight every morning. I had a few bad weeks and the scale was going up and I was still checking and getting upset and stressed out which led to more chocolate, etc. It's a vicious cycle, really! I haven't checked now in, let's see a few days, but before that was more than a week. I haven't been to WW either. I'm going tomorrow to face the music. I'm probably OK but I could be more than 70. And so it goes.

I think what I'm really curious about is... why do we choose a number that is quite below the top end of our range, for example. I mean, 135 is in my range, but to be honest I would look like crap at 135. So how is it that someone who basically is the "same" as me (height, shape, bones) wants to be lower than what I want to be? Is it personal preference? Or is it something else?

I know I'm probably going way too deep for my own good, but I struggle, I really do, with just being happy. Obviously I care enough to count points and exercise every day (well, not every day with the exercise). Why don't I "care" more to go lower then? Am I lazy? Am I greedy? I don't know.

I am aiming more for a size than a number...but I know what is a healthy range so I am not at risk of a stroke or something. I know when I get to that "#" I will be healthy because I will only get there thru excersice and healthy eatting. And once I get there, I will be doing the same stuff I have been doing, cause if I don't I will be back to the 190 mark. You can't live like a large person and not become one. You must act like a healthy person to become that. The numbers are just a goal. Something to shoot for. Something to check to see how far we have come.

Okay... this one of the things that bothers me the MOST about American medical care (I have tons of things I hate about it, but that's another thread, lol) - why in the **** aren't doctors telling people that they need to lose weight? For the past 13 years my weight has gone up & down (most up, hehe) - and I've had health problems (nothing major) where I was seeing a doctor like once per month - and even at 5'6 and 205 pounds, not ONE doctor said, "You are overweight, and you are putting yourself at risk, you need to lose at least 50 lbs".

So... they'd rather give us meds & pain pills, operate when our hearts go bad, give us chemo & radiation when we get cancer and wait until our bodies give out on us rather than simply teaching prevention. I knew I needed to lose weight, but I think of how much more powerful the message would've been coming from my doctor - it may've gotten me started on this journey earlier. I'm not blaming them for my overweight problems, but dammit, they are our health-care professionals and they should be telling us at every opportunity that our weight directly affects our health... but for the most part, they're not!

Ok, *rant off* hehe

Rockette - I'm the same height as you & my goal is 135... why? Well, because that's the goal I set at the beginning - it's a healthy goal, it's an attainable goal and it's a measurable goal. I chose a weight I've been in the past where I felt strong & healthy, I also looked at weight/height charts & BMI charts, and I chose a median weight within the range for my height/build. I can be a very data-oriented person, I have to be at my job - if I don't say ahead of time "this is what I want to achieve" then how will I know when I'm successful? How will I know when I should stop losing and work on maintaining?

Some folks can say, "I'm just going to lose until I'm happy with myself" - and that's awesome for them. If you're happy at 150, then you're not "lazy" or "greedy" or whatever - you've just reached your goal of being happy with yourself. I might reach 150 and decide the same thing, who knows? But honestly, numbers are important to me. I've met people who are 100 lbs overweight (and some who were 40 lbs underweight) who say they "feel fine" and are "happy" with themselves... is that a good thing? Psychologically it might be - but physically?

It's just a different way of looking at things - I suppose. I'm not obsessed with it by any means, nor do I want to be a "waif" - but I've found I am waaaaaaay more successful in all aspects of my life when I operate by facts, figures & statistics than by my feelings. Just my way of doing things.

I agree Lunula. I'm actually aiming for a fairly "heavy" weight for my height. To be totally honest, the most incredible I've ever felt was when I weighed 160 - but I was lifting every day and wore a size 9. Weight is subjective, indeed. Part of me just wants to see what the heck I'd look like at 135. I mean... that might be a really good weight for me, I don't know yet. OTOH, I may stop at 150 because I've been putting on muscle, I'm down to a good size, and I just feel great. Oh **** I just wanna not be FAT. *lol*

As far as happy goes, Rockette - you're right. If you're an unhappy person, and the reasons you're unhappy are not addressed, it won't matter how much weight you lose, nothing will change.

Oh, and Lunula .. amen to the post about Doctors. My ex, who I still have a good relationship with, FINALLY saw a doctor who told him point blank that if he continued on the way he had been, he'd probably be dead in a year. Not only that, but the doc refused to see him again unless he decided to change his ways. Heh. Gooooo Doc!

Okay, highest weight was 225, which was well AFTER kids had been born and weaned, so Ginya, I have to blame myself too!!! Lowest weight was 94 pounds (in college) and I still felt fat!!! I am the shortest one here (sorry Ruth!! You are a close second!!) at 4' 10 1/2". I have decided not to worry too much about the weight charts, since weight has been a lifelong fight for me. I don't want to get sucked back into that "nothing is good enough" mindset, which has contributed to me gaining weight back after other weight loss attempts. If I am heavy, but able to do all the things I want to do (camping and hiking) without feeling like I am about to die, then I may just stop there. First goal is 199, to be under 200 pounds. Ultimate goal? I don't really know, but maybe 150. When I was doing Karate I weighed 190, but I was a lot firmer. My main goal is to get healthy!!!

weight is sooo subjective. At 160 I was a comfortable size 12, but all mushy fat and about 29% on the BMI. Raven you were a 9/10!! WOW! I am 5'4", so maybe we have a height difference. I do notice a difference now that I am liftin weights. I am smaller at a higher weight and my body is firmer.

Lunula: I don't like doctors. I have heard of doctors telling patients to go on diets, but that isn't common enough. Here we live in a nation bombarded by research that says 60% of adults are overweight. Unfortunately in our consumer culture it would be bad to change that. Less super sizing and consumption; thus less profits! Healthier people ultimatley cost less thus the drug companies make less and the doctors amke less and the stupid reaserchers make less.....Our economy depends on over consumption! One of my students had a shirt the other day that depicted a Russian Marxist looking guy pointing and below him it said: CONSUME. I told the student, "you are making quite a statement, though at 12 he probably didn't even pick out the shirt. I enjoyed it's dry humor though.

Sandi

Hey Sandi - you and I are about the same height. It's amazing how much muscle you can pack around and still look small.

Lunula, you're so right about the doctor/weight loss thing. The government should be advocating it, and even subsidizing programs (ummm, assuming there's progress made). It's the same with cigarette smoking. Why the heck do our governments allow it in public places and then have to spend oodles of money "curing the problem"!
It's wonderful now in Ottawa... every public place is smoke-free. The bar owners (and initially the restaurant owners) put up a heck of a stink, but it's great going somewhere without having to be exposed to second-hand smoke. (by the way, I'm NOT bashing anyone for smoking... I used to do it on occasion myself. )

It's true, Sandi. The G.D.P. of our countries THRIVE on stuff like cancer, oil spills, clear-cutting forests... It's just not right.

I confess, I weigh everyday. And don't tell me to stop! It's a positive thing for me. I don't get upset when I see a gain... I just draw in the reins. If I don't weigh, I think I can eat whatever I want. I can easily gain ten pounds over one weekend if I don't keep on top of it.

I was a size 6 at 130 lbs. I think being a comfortable size 10 is p within my reach and realistic since I am size 12 now and I just need to lose that last 12 lbs. I am so close to my goal that it is frustrating but I know that I will be happy at a fit and toned 145lbs and that I won't want to go any lower than that.

I am actually pretty happy with myself right now and just need to exercise more and tone my muscles. I unfortunately lack discipline in the exercise department but I am slowly getting there.

Hi!

I am doing this in stages. I started at 254. I have lost all the weight that I have gained since college. I now want to lose all the weight I gained in college (get to 180) and then to 150. After that I'll see what happens.

It's hard thinking in sizes, in the plus sizes I wear in tops is a a 14/16 most of the time but in regular sizes an XL barely fits. DM

I am about 145 right now, maintaining since December, but I would like to get to 135 or 140 this year. I will need to exercise more (start running again maybe, in the spring) and eat a little less. But if I stay here that would be OK too. I am about a size 10-12 (depends on the label - they are all different!). My highest non-pregnant weight was 178-80 about 3 years ago. I had a lot going on - marital stuff, a mom with Alzheimers', two kids under 3. I didn't really start to lose significantly (i.e. make the significant necessary changes in my eating/exercise) until about a year ago. I knew I wasn't going to be able to deal with losing weight too even though I didn't like it. I am 5-5 and big boned, size 10 shoe, muscular. DH likes me best in the outdoorsy/LL Bean sort of look, and it does suit me! (This frustrated my fashion-plate mother no end, I think).

Anyhow...my lowest adult weight was 127 and I would be delighted to get there but at age 40, all things considered, I don't know how realistic that is! I was 147 before I got pregnant in my early 30s and was eating carefully and exercising a lot...so maybe about where I am is about where I am supposed to be...

You are all awesome women, BTW! I am honored to be in your company...

Lidian