[guacamole]

There have been a few family and college reunion events that I have missed because of my....weight! I am so embarrassed to see people who last knew me when I was thin. I have estranged myself from extended family and friends because I am ashamed of my outer appearance.

I have a mini-reunion of sorts coming up in August, and I am obsessing about it already. It makes it worse that an old boyfriend will be there with his family. Ladies, you know how it is when you want an old flame to eat his heart out...not look at you and think that you must have been doing lots of eating since he last saw you!

[Lunula]

First of all, congrats on losing 29 lbs!

Second, I know exactly how you feel. I've lost so many friends over the past 10-15 years because of my insecurity over weight. I looked for every excuse not to do things -- it spilled over to family functions, too. I turned 40 this year and it has made me reevaluate a lot, and losing friends because I'm fat -- or rejecting my family because I'm embarassed - it's just not who I want to be anymore.

Keep on the path you're on, seriously, 29 lbs is awesome! Since I began regular exercise and healthy eating (WW online) I've managed to lose 50 lbs and get off of an anti-depressant, an anti-anxiety pill and stopped taking Ambien to sleep! And we took two major vacations this year that I looked FORWARD to -- unbelievable!! Just don't stress over the event in August - I started stressing about both vacations and it led to some binges and general stress eating. Keep on with what you're doing and good luck!

[guacamole]

Thanks, Lunula! I have been battling hunger lately - self-sabotage! You are right, I think it is the stress over the reunion! I have already skipped two out of town family functions this summer because I hate how I look.

I am proud of the 29lbs....but it is coming off so slowly. Congrats on the 50 lbs! You are an inspiration!

[rubidoux]

I know how you feel. I'm mostly okay with family, though I did have a hard time last thanksgiving seeing BIL who I hadn't seen in several years and his new wife, the marathon runner. But when we went home to Boston a couple of weeks ago I was very conscious of the possibility of running into someone who last saw me at 19 years old and 120 pounds. Gah! And an old boyfriend would have been the worst.

I do think it's a great idea to love and accept yourself at any size. Not sure how to get there, though.

[guacamole]

A number of my family members and friends have recently lost large amounts of weight, so that is always a topic of conversation and comparison. I guess it doesn't do any good to isolate myself.

[Singe]

Originally Posted by guacamole

I guess it doesn't do any good to isolate myself.

exactly

[Imannott]

I did the same thing, avoided friends and family because of my weight. I couldn't avoid it last summer and had to go, I dreaded it for days. But, when I got there everyone was so happy to see me no one mentioned my weight. So you might be being harder on yourself than others will be on you.