I don't think the why's matter nearly as much as we tend to think.
I've started seeing my exercise and dietary changes, like good oral hygiene. No more or less important, just something I do because I want the best results I can get.
I'm going to go with Kaplods on this - at least for me, my focus is mostly on my behaviors, which I can control. I may not WANT to control them - it's certainly fun to eat whatever foods I want! That's my reason for being fat - I ate too much and moved too little! And I'm not one of those people who has lost my taste for my old favorites, they still tempt me. But I just make a choice to not eat them and move on.
This thread is very timely for me. This is my first week. I started a blog today. I titled today's heading "What is different?" I compared compulsive over eating (I am fat because I eat to much) to smoking. My "emotions" didn't matter about smoking - I didn't have to stop having emotions to stop smoking, I just had to stop smoking. At least to me it makes sense that emotional eating doesn't matter. I just need to pick a healthy plan and stick to it! For me, the less choice I have, the less opportunity for mistake. Maybe when I weight 140lbs less - I will start to have choices again. But for now the choice is don't eat what you didn't plan to eat, just like I quit smoking.
Hmmmm.... basic bottom line is I EAT TOO MUCH. But to get into the nitty-gritty, it's about not exercising enough (I used to be avid about exercise, but as I've aged, I've lost that "WOO HOO" mentality about exercise) and I believe the sheer fact that I am seriously a SUGARAHOLIC. I love sweets, always have.
But the biggest reason (heh, no pun intended! ) that I am fat is simply that I love food. All kinds of food. And if I'm eating something, I eat way past satiation if it's something I truly love ...I'll have HUGE portions, then 2nds, sometimes even 3rd helpings. Then I realize how STUFFED I am and it's just a disgusting feeling, from the bloatedness to the WTF is wrong with me that I keep eating even tho I know I'm no longer hungry?
I've probed the emotional side - there's no hidden reason, no deep dark secret that I'm hiding or trying to avoid, no childhood trauma, etc or whatever - I just simply LOVE food. Now, intellectually, I KNOW if I'm not hungry I should not eat. But I often do, because "it's time to eat" or because "if I don't eat now I'll be super-duper-crazy-hungry later" or because "I have time to eat now & later I know I won't have time". Sometimes I eat because "you shouldn't skip meals" & other such expert advice. And sometimes I do eat out of sheer boredom, but that's really very rare.
So WHY AM I FAT? That's easy. TOO. MUCH. FOOD.
And what is my problem? Why don't I do better at controlling portion sizes or saying no to 2nd/3rd helpings or only eating when I'm truly hungry as opposed to "hey-there's-some-food-and-here-I-am-so-I-think-I'll-just-eat-it"???? Is it little or no will power? Is it the fact that I'm pause'n and crazy hormones have ravaged me? Is it that I have Scarlett syndrome ("I won't think about it now; I'll think about it tomorrow")? Is it that I've dieted so much in my past that I'm really sick & tired of trying to be thin anymore?
I'm not sure. But I DO KNOW that I love food! - and I can't possibly live without it, literally! - so I better keep trying until I discover the best way FOR ME to deal with MY BODY and what "way of eating" is best FOR ME. I want to be healthy; I want to be thinner; I want to not dwell on every single bite of food that passes my lips; I want to wear cute clothes; I want to do my own pedicures; I want to be NORMAL. Is that too much to ask?
I think we're fat, in all sincerity, for two reasons.
1.) food is too available
2.) we connect it with socialization from an very early age
If we simply ate to live and did not intermingle eating with other pleasurable or soothing aspects of our lives I believe we would not have a problem. In addition, if we had to work harder to get food we would not be able to impulse eat and would find other ways to self sooth. FWIW.
I am fat for a variety of sub-reasons, all coming down to one: Unhealthy food intake (either too much, or the wrong type.)
Before I specify my individual sub-reasons, I want to add something to what chubby14 above me said: I think in addition to socialization connected to food, there is also the don't-waste-food mentality that many of us were raised on. "Clean your plate, or no dessert." "Young lady, you're not getting up from the table until you've finished your supper." "Think of the starving children in Africa." (My brother couldn't have been the only child ever to answer, "Why not send this to them?") To this day, I sometimes catch myself in restaurants trying to finish everything on my plate, long after I feel full, because I was trained that it is a sin to waste food. A therapist pointed out that eating more than your body needs is wasting food too, and that helped.
Besides this, here are my challenges:
I was my mother's first baby. Being very young, she didn't know better, and fed me every time I cried. She didn't catch on that maybe I might have a tummy ache from eating so much. She figured if I was crying, it meant I was hungry, so she'd feed me. By five months old, despite having been a preemie, I was on two junior-size jars of baby food all three meals a day. Obviously this is way too much food, and I think it created the "fat" predisposition.
Considering the overfeeding as a baby and the constant eat-everything-on-your-plate messages I was getting, I don't know how my weight escaped being an issue in my pre-school and early school days, but I remember being average-size back then. When I hit early puberty at age 8, I developed an unrealistic negative body image. Discounting the fact that I was a head taller than my classmates and was developing while they were not, I felt "fat" because I weighed more. This self-image followed me into high school, and at that age I began to slip into the medically overweight category. I still wasn't "fat," though, not until after my children were born. I gained 40 pounds with each of my first two pregnancies, and never lost it. With the third I gained nothing, but I still didn't lose anything afterward.
Since then, it has been simply a matter of not knowing how to eat properly. Conflicting information has been confusing. Further complications include becoming physically disabled in a car accident. I probably will become less disabled as I continue to lose weight, but the accident itself has hindered.
It is interesting that I have looked in the mirror and seen the same fat person looking back since I was eight years old, although obviously my body could not have been the same size or shape then. I probably will always see myself as fat, even if I should reach my goal.
I am fat because I too love food. I am now in the obese category, weighing more than ever before!
Like many others, I think about this question on a regular basis. I am a compulsive overeater. I wake up thinking about food and go to bed thinking about food. Every where I go I seem to find food. Grocery store, drug store, gas station, Walmart... You name it, food is everywhere! I buy food and eat it in my car on my way to work or back to my house. I will make a special stop to get rid of all the evidence(wrappers, etc). I am never really sure who I am hiding it from. Sometimes I think not having any evidence when I get where I'm going makes it easier to deny my irrational behaviors.
I do actually try to get some exercise on a regular basis. Based on the calories I consume, some days probably 4000 or more, I would certainly weigh over 300 by now if not for the exercise.
I am really trying to get myself in that "zone" to get this weight off. I am getting ready to start a low carb weight loss program. Unfortunately, as I am "getting ready" to start, I am eating everything in site to be sure I am ready. Also a regular pattern for me. I am always taking in those last snacks and meals before I start the next weight loss program...
Genetically, I'm supposed to be pretty thin. My dad was a rail and I inherited his bone structure.
But I inherited my mom's depression and her use of food as comfort. I have abused food even when I was little and would binge on candy and hide the wrappers under the bed.
As an adult, I had more freedom and the weight piled on. I never became obese because of my stellar metabolism, but I hovered between 20-50 pounds overweight. And I convinced myself I didn't have a problem because, well, it was a "few" extra pounds.
I've always had this concept that if one candy bar tastes good, more would be better. I never learned the concept of moderation, only excess. I wish our society didn't encourage that behavior. Even kiddie portions are way too much.
I am now grappling with new territory in this weight journey. Eating moderate portions is beginning to feel normal, but I do run to the old ways and bury myself in food.
I remember growing up in a home which 'required you cleaned your plate. I remember being the "chubby" girl and was told I wasn't fat but 'big boned" (we all know there is no such thing as that).
As I grew older I just accepted that I would always be the 'big' one in my family and circle of friends.
About a year ago my job changed to working from home and since then my weight has steadily increased.
I am fat because I have no will power, no witnesses and no belief that I can be a healthy weight.
Today was day one to get in control.
This weekend I felt like a sausage, like I was too big for my skin. I struggled to paint my toenails and overall I felt ugly. No one should feel that way.
My goal is to change all the 'no's in my life. I can be in control, I can be pretty and I can be healthy.
How I got fat - couple of things, meds I have taken over the years for my mood disorder and poor eating habits such as eating too fast, fast food, eating too many carbs and eating double servings or more. I gained about 40 pounds in my thirties and then another 40 pounds in my early 40s alone.
At a physical in August of 2009 I weighed in at 252. I freaked, I was over 250, in my mind closer to 300. Talked to my doctor and the nurse about a weight loss plan and what I needed to do. They gave me some information on nutrition and my doctor told me to join a supportive group like Weight Watchers. I ended up here for support and I started keeping a food journal. I bought a scale and I walk on my breaks at work. I decided to calorie count and eat 1,500 a day.
I keep motivated by reminding myself I have lost 40 pounds! I am really proud of myself. I also keep in mind how many of my little to not to little aches and pains have just about disappeared, my lower back and knees rarely have pain. My bloodwork, except for triglycerides, looks much better than it did last summer at that fateful physical. I am wearing smaller clothes now. And I love food but that means I love food that is good for you too.
I was obese as a child (heaviest in my school) but lost weight (self-directed but based on WW) before high school. Remained on the thin side with some yoyoing until pregnancy. After that, I slowly gained with some intermittent yoyo losses. I never really realized just how heavy I was getting. I was eating primarily healthy food but too much of it for my relatively sedentary life (desk job without a lot of exercise). It was a shock to me at my HW to see that I was flirting with the obese BMI category.
My childhood obesity may have contributed to my tendency to put on weight easily. My desk job makes it hard to get enough exercise. My yoyo dieting might have done something screwy to my metabolism. The slow rate of average weight gain probably made it more difficult to notice. My focus on aging parents and a young child may have distracted me. The severe stress I was under for several years and my sleep maintenance problems might have contributed physiologically.
Why was I fat? There are a lot of potential contributing factors, but in the end I was eating too much relative to what I was burning off. Some of the contributing factors are no longer in play, but many still are and there are new obstacles as I age and face menopause.
I have found an approach to losing which seems to work for me and it really doesn't seem to have much to do with the reasons why I became heavy in the first place. And if it stops working, I will find some tweak or new approach and keep trying!
I was diagnosed with PCOS 2 years ago, so I reckon that must have had something to do with it.
But I know that I also used to eat when I was bored, and I used to comfort eat because I was lonely when I was in the early years of secondary school (because I was overweight and so felt I didn't fit in... vicious circle lol). Most of the food I ate was high carbs, stuff like bread, pasta, pizza, and so on, and also obviously sweets and crisps and things.
I rarely did any exercise and didn't really leave the house aside from for school for a few years. I do have a condition with my feet which makes it difficult to be able to play sports, but really I think I used it as an excuse not to exercise, since I now know that there's plenty of exercises I CAN do a the gym. But then I was only 11-15 so I couldn't really go to a gym back then.
I honestly can't remember a time before last year when I didn't feel overweight. Even when I was like 7 or 8 I felt bigger than the other girls at my primary school.
) that I am fat is simply that I love food. All kinds of food. And if I'm eating something, I eat way past satiation if it's something I truly love ...I'll have HUGE portions, then 2nds, sometimes even 3rd helpings. Then I realize how STUFFED I am and it's just a disgusting feeling, from the bloatedness to the WTF is wrong with me that I keep eating even tho I know I'm no longer hungry? 
... great insight about Owning Up !
