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Old 05-27-2013, 06:57 PM   #1  
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Default Losing the emotional weight.

Happy memorial day everyone,
While we may not be US military veterans, one thing is for sure- We are all fighting a war against our weight and food.

With my medical program (see my older posts for more info) I see a psychologist, who is the COOLEST ever... I started seeing her cause I have the psychological makeup to make the jump from emotional eater to anorexic or bulimic with my control and perfection issues... She let me babble through 4 sessions before I finally broke through...

I am aftaid to admit I have real issues because that means I am not as strong as I want people to think I am, I don't want them to see me as weak. I am afraid to be seen as weak, because then I'll have to ask for/accept help, and to ask for/accept help I would have to trust that people won't let me down...

(it's taken weeks and tons of introspection to get there!)

Anyhow, I digress, where I was really going with this was a group inquiry.

What is everyone doing to deal with the emotional issues that got us to our current weight?

Myself: along with the therapy, I am working through a workbook called " The Food and Feelings workbook" (slowly because it makes me uncomfortable). and I have been journaling. Guided journaling I found on an Eating Disorder recovery website. Current Focus: Fear. Because this is preventing me from dealing with my other issues. I'm also tracking my meals with an App called Recovery Record... It is more geared twds Bulimics and Anerexics, but it gives me great warm fuzzy motivational feedback... and holds me accountable... (and gives me a record for my dietician!)

I would love to hear how everyone else is tacking these issues... We have more to face than food to be healthy... So lets pool our thoughts and resources!
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Old 05-27-2013, 07:12 PM   #2  
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I was lucky enough to find a treatment center in my town that treats binge eating disorder. I really needed the help because it is the emotional side of things that causes me problems. If it weren't for the emotional side of eating, losing and maintaining would be easy - just find a plan you like and stick to it forever. But if that was all it took, none of us old have problems, right?

The program does have a nutritional counseling component to it, but the parts that help from an motionless standpoint are the behavioral therapy lessons and the body image group sessions. I also have an individual counselor who I can talk to about the emotional issues I'm facing that wouldn't be appropriate to discuss in a group setting.

I still have issues with the occasional binge. And before I started therapy I never realized that restriction was an equally important issue to work on...I'm struggling with that side even more. I'm just trying to maintain, not lose, but I'm so afraid to overeat and go on a meal plan like they want me to that I have lost weight since I've been going there. Do you know how scary it is, after years of being told to eat less and exercise more, to be told to do just the opposite?

Anyway, still learning but the therapy has made me believe that one day I might be able to eat like people without food issues do.

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Old 05-27-2013, 07:22 PM   #3  
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Kitty!
Right! I have been doing WW, because counting points keeps me in control and accountable, my dietician isnt sure this is a "sustainable eating style". For me, it's going to have to be. Just like some people in recovery got to AA or NA for life, I will weigh and count for life... It keeps me from binging and restricting... I can eat what I want, I just have to count it. lol

The program I am in is a "metobolic health and weight management" program, but it's run by an eating disorder treatment center... I have an amazing team, and they have classes that fit your issues...

I am lucky, I have good body image, I don't DISLIKE my body... and that gets me in trouble too... I was never alarmed when I gained weight...

I really wish obesity related eating disorders were treated with the same respect that bulimia and anorexia get... it would make it easier, if this wasn't such a vague battle...
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Old 05-27-2013, 07:38 PM   #4  
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I really like this thread!

I practice something called EBT (Emotional Brain Training - www.ebtgroups.org) and it has been a really effective way for me to learn how to deal with stress without going to food. Helps me really experience my emotions without feeling overwhelmed by them, helps me identify and let go of unrealistic expectations I have of myself, figure out what I really want to do about something, and then I can live more authentically and enjoy life as it comes.

Every stressful situation has layers of feelings to deal with. I was hung up on anger for so long, about so many things. I'd get stuck there, because it was easier to live with being angry that it was to be sad all the time or to live in fear or guilt. But I'm finally learning to address those other feelings too. Somehow I'm surprised they're all there. Working through them all and getting clarity opens me up to experience gratitude and compassion for myself (so, so hard for me to get there!) as well as others. And once I balance it all out, I might even find genuine forgiveness for some people and be open to real, healthy emotional intimacy.
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Old 05-27-2013, 07:44 PM   #5  
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That's AWESOME Georgia,

I've been a long time fan of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) but I haven't heard about EBT, I'm going to look into that.

With this workbook, even though I'm still in chapter 1, I'm discovering sitting with my feelings is quite a challenge. I am quick to say "I'm fine". and I can deal with anger towards people indirectly... But I struggle with some of the rawer emotions...especially ones that may lead to confrontation...
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Old 05-27-2013, 09:49 PM   #6  
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I've always found it difficult to face or to share my true feelings or thoughts. In fact, it was my experience during my formative years that the expression of independent thoughts and feelings was to be strongly discouraged. I've tried therapy on a three occasions; however, they all resulted in negative experiences. I'm sure that there exist very capable and effective therapists and counselors; I just haven't been able to find one. I've tried OA, WW, the Weigh Down Program but I was unsuccessful in those types of therapies. (I just felt uncomfortable and out of place.) I've been keeping a journal, but I know that is not enough. My habit of turning to food in order to deal with uncomfortable feelings like sadness, disappointment, discouragement, anger, guilt, and most of all fear/anxiety has got to stop or else I'll never be able to drop the weight and leave it where I dropped it. I went to the EBT website, but I think the program is available only to licensed professionals. I'll continue to search for a program until I find one that I can work with.
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Old 05-27-2013, 10:05 PM   #7  
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I love this thread. I started w a counselor after I lost 100 lbs. I know I have an unhealthy relationship w food. Nobody searches out to get morbidly obese. I have felt the most emotionally healthy I think ever ad an adult.
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Old 05-28-2013, 12:34 AM   #8  
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My apologies, I passed along the provider training link. The link for the rest of us is www.ebtgroups.com.

I've done OA, WW and Weigh Down Workshop too. I still see a therapist when I really want to talk things out about history, etc. But EBT is purely about dealing with the emotions and rewiring how we react to situations. I am actually participating in a telegroup directly with Laurel Mellin, the founder of EBT. She's very dedicated to helping people and a very genuine person.

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Old 05-28-2013, 01:49 PM   #9  
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This is a great thread! The emotional side is so hard to get a handle on. Thanks for posting.
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Old 05-28-2013, 03:38 PM   #10  
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Hi Georgia no need to apologize. I appreciate you sharing your resources. Thanks for posting the EBT website. I'm going to check it out right now.
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