[imnotperfect24]

They dont understand.. at all....

They dont know whati t feels like to be 300+

My dad says "Oh just go to the gym 4-5 times a week it's no big deal" what he does not understand is that it's PHYSICALLY not possible. 2-3 times a week yes. It hurts to go more then that.. I' not trying to make excuses.. but seriously they dont understand.

Walking hurts
going up stairs hurts
exercise hurts.

My body is to big to do much of anything. Anyone else have this problem.. Family expecting to much.

I mean **** I've lost 11lbs so far.. Cant they be happy i'm loosing? Instead of trying to get me to do to much to fast?

[TheRainFalls]

Try to explain your point of view to them. If they do not understand don't let it get to you. Do what you feel is good for you. As long as its working for you and your happy/healthy that's all that matters.

[btrinny]

I've learned that I have to tune my family out. They honestly just don't get it and then if I do listen it just makes me feel bad and most likely self destruct. Honestly only my husband knows this time that I am not only trying to loss weight, but am using Medical Weight Loss Clinic. After the first two weeks he saw my effort and has really stepped up to help me (grrr gotta hate him he is thin and eats whatever he wants).

[LiannaKole]

I know what it's like to have a family who doesn't understand. I've never been 300+ lbs and cannot really imagine it, but I have been the ONLY obese person in my family. The result is that I rarely (if ever, and even then very vaguely) discuss exercise/diet/weight-loss with my family.

But if your family is on your back about it, maybe explain to them that exercise isn't the most important thing - diet actually is. And this is true - the vast majority of weight loss is due to diet. Exercising will make you stronger, but probably not smaller.

Good luck with everything.

[mountain walker]

Hey imnotperfect24 I am not sure how old you are but assuming that you are over 18 I think that the best approach is to ensure your parents see you as a grown up. ( we are perpetually 12 to our parents!).
As long as you take responsibility for yourself and aren't expecting your parents to fund your weight loss efforts (gym membership etc) then you could say "Mum, Dad, Aunty Gladys (whoever!) I appreciate your concern for me but I am doing my best to address my issues with weight/health/exercise etc. I would really appreciate your support but if you can't manage that it would be helpful if you kept your negative comments to yourselves"
I REALLY wish I had summoned the courage to say that to my Mum who would say repeatedly she was ashamed of my weight and wasn't my (size 8) sister-in-law gorgeous.She died 4 years ago and I regret not standing up for myself.
Good luck and remember we are all on your side on this website!!!

[cherrygarcia]

my mum was always on my back about the weight loss with lots of insensitive comments and pressure.

Then one day i decided to write her a 10page email detailing the bad and the ugly things i'd experienced because of my fat, how i'd been treated with disdain and treated like a leper of society, and how i'd never even had a boyfriend because no guy would look at me twice, and basically all the pain and hurt i'd grown up in this body with.

After she read it she said she was sorry for all she'd ever said and that all she wanted was the best for me and would help support me. So at least now we're more or less okay so i'm glad about that.

I hope that it works out for you. Just hang in there and remember you are doing this for you x

[mountain walker]

Cherrygarcia, I am so glad you sorted it with your Mum. Alot of what people say they GENUINELY don't realise how hurtful it is until you point out that constantly rabbiting on about how someone lost 100lbs on weight watchers or the pointed remarks about your choice of blue cheese dressing over low fat on your jacket potato. Of course some people say awful things to "shock you thin" or just to be downright bl**dy hurtful.
Our bodies are OUR business and are not up for discussion, particularly by people who don't care to get to know us as people just see us as another fat butt taking up space!!
Oops got carried away there sorry!

[imnotperfect24]

Thanks every.. Just needed to hear words of encouragement.

I am over 18 but the thing is I'm currently without a job (Been looking for a VERY long time with no success) and I live at home and going to school full time. So that line is a very thin one. They think they can boss me around (as I'm under their roof I guess they can) But I need my independence. Like i said VERY thin line.

[mnemosyne]

I am over 18 but the thing is I'm currently without a job (Been looking for a VERY long time with no success) and I live at home and going to school full time. So that line is a very thin one. They think they can boss me around (as I'm under their roof I guess they can) But I need my independence. Like i said VERY thin line.

Chica,

If you are living at home, you definitely need their support, not their approbation. I would recommend that you spend some time thinking about what sort of support you need from them. Could they help by keeping healthier foods in the house? Or by going for walks with you? (Or by leaving you alone when you got for a walk! ) Or by offering you encouragement of a different sort? I would really sit down and think about that stuff, and then sit down and have a chat with them - a heart to heart - telling them how difficult this is for you, how hard you have to work to lose weight, how you want it to work, and ask them to partner with you. Ask them for their understanding and hopefully they will give you what you need.

I'd also say, too: If you are working out to the point of being so sore that it takes you several days to recover, you are doing too much and should maybe pull back, but exercise more regularly at somewhat lower intensity.

If you can only walk ten minutes twice a day, you are still getting in twenty minutes of walking! (If you can only manage five minutes - twice a day is ten minutes. Three times a day is 15!) Spread out the exercise, do it in small segments, focus on increasing your time a bit every week.

Commit to that five times per week and you will find the back pain and other issues that limit you initially because of deconditioning will start to recede. I know how hard it is, but hopefully that will help you start building up stamina!