[MissAkward]

Hello my name is Melissa, I am 25...26 on the the 29th of the month. I am married for 6 yrs now to a wonderful man, mom of a 4 yr old amazing little boy. I have always been the black sheep of the family..so all I really have is those two. I don't have any friends...because I have bad social anxiety(I don't leave the house much). So as you can see I don't have much support. I have always been overweight. I haven't weight since I was preggie. I know I am over 400lbs and I am 5' 9". Hoping to get under 400 for I can get a normal scale. We are poor, so the scales that go higher I can't afford. I am trying to eat healther..but I seem to get depressed and mess up. I use to follow along with work out videos...want to do that again. I always start out good...start feeling better...then I mess up and give up. Really need support and help.

[iamworthit]

Hi Melissa.
You are not alone in how you are feeling. Each of us that need to lose weight have troubles in one way or another. I can relate to your post in that I don't have a typical relationship with my family. In fact.. I don't have a relationship with them at all. I have a loving and supportive fiance' and a sweet daughter.
Like you.. they are all I have (aside from my 2 cats) that I have to support me but having this forum is such a blessing. In reading the posts and inspirational stories...I found that I truly am not alone in my problems concerning weight loss and being obese.
I am 5'7 and 298lbs. I just recently made the decision to be healthy. I am hoping all the best for you.

[Lovely]

Welcome to 3FC =)

You aren't alone. We're all here looking to lose some weight, make healthy choices, move a little more.

Here's the thing... giving up and quitting won't help you lose weight. You already know that. We already know that. So you have to find a way to stop thinking that you are allowed to quit.

We're humans here at 3FC, we're not robots... where am I going with this, you might be thinking... well, it means that WE ALL MAKE MISTAKES! Little ones, big ones, eating things we didn't want to eat, missing a day of exercise, finding out after we ate something that the calories were high, etc, etc.

Look around, you aren't the only person who makes mistakes. What's the difference? The people here don't quit when we make one. Quitting isn't an option.

The ONLY way to fail while eating healthier is to give up entirely.

We're fond of saying "This isn't a diet. This is a lifestyle change." It's almost cliche at this point, but it doesn't matter, because it's true. The changes we're making and have made... those are our new normal. Just like a person who is naturally a normal weight, if they eat something they didn't want, or miss a day of exercise they don't quit and eat whatever they want forever, they don't give up and stop exercising entirely... the very next meal, the very next day they go back to normal.

We have to be the same way. Mistakes will happen. We can learn from them, minimize them to the best of our abilities, and then move on.

Lesson number one for you? Let go of thinking you're perfect. Thoughts of perfection are nothing but detrimental when changing your life.

Just aim for healthier every day. One day at a time.

You like the work out tapes? AWESOME! How about you plan to do one a couple times a week. Start there. Plan it out. Make it a habit! Make it something you aim to do regularly.

Then build from there. Choose a food plan that fits your life.

You are more than welcome all over the boards. We love to help support and encourage other members... because we're on the same journey! The journey towards healthier.

I cannot stress this enough: You can do this!

Hope to see you around the boards

[KerriLeah]

HI Melissa, welcome to hanging out around here. This is a great place for support. Revel in having those two wonderful people in your life. I hope that your husband supports your decision to get healthier. It is a difficult decision but rewarding!! I have lurked here for years and so rarely come across anyone not wonderful, so enjoy the forums for all they have to offer. I can spend hours here, learning and chatting, reading and studying ideas on how to make my journey easier. Good luck to you! See you soon.

[Looking4Me2011]

I just wanna say hi and welcome!!! The fact that you came here is a great step! Everyone here is very supportive and honest (be forewarned lol) but if you need someone to talk to, there are plenty of us here!

You can do anything you set your mind to and we are more than willing to be your friend and listen to your rants, your venting about whatever, and try to give you whatever advice we all have.

Don't worry about being perfect. You took a step, an important step and that's always the hardest!

My hugs go out to you You can do this!

[fatgyrl]

HI Melissa,
Welcome to 3FC
I too don't have a scale, so again you are not alone
Deb

[MissAkward]

Thank you all so very much! Made me smile to see all the replies I will start out with 2 or 3 days of work outs a week and slowly build up but making sure I make it a habit so that way I don't get burnt out like before. My hubby even said he will do workouts with me since he wants to get back into shape too. I bought more healthy foods today. Passed all the junk food. I am trying hard. I think it is mostly saying no to fast foods and candy. lol. Thank you all for the wonderful replies

[scrappygal]

Hi and welcome!! I just joined this site a few days back, but I really love it already. Everyone is super friendly and welcoming!

Good luck on your weight loss journey! Have faith in yourself, and you can accomplish anything.

[lostbutstilltrying]

Hi welcome! so many of us have been where you are. Its easy to withdraw and turn to food for comfort when you are anxious.

If you want a measure of where you start, you can get two cheaper scales, stand with one foot on each and add the numbers up (I've done that, its not perfect, but it's not bad) or and I think this one is even better, get a tape measure and take your measurements - that's where the real differences come when you first start - more so than the numbers on the scale

Remember to really make changes, you need to change slowly and do things that you can live with.

And if it is an incentive to change, learn from my mistake, you have to live the way you would want your child to live. I would tell my daughter to eat healthy and exercise - but because I didn't model that behavior she has learned all my bad habits and at 11 is obese. We are trying to change now - but it's hard. How wonderful for you that you and your son can get/stay healthy together.

[Nekomania]

A good tip for being able to pass up junk food at the store is to never shop hungry!

And welcome to 3FC, I haven't been here long but I LOVE THE COMMUNITY already. This site is full of amazing tips and a lot of amazing success stories that really give me a kick in the a** to get into gear when I'm feeling down.

Since I've joined here I've lost 13 pounds, and I still don't feel like I'm on a "diet". I really hope you stay with us.

Start a blog, take some pictures of yourself every week.

My big motivator for avoiding bad food and snacking during the day is a picture of myself hanging on my fridge. It's not very flattering and makes me feel slightly embarrassed when I open the fridge so...it seems negative, but it helps.

I also have one of those piggie things in my fridge that oinks when the light comes on. -.- It's supposed to be cute but really... its like its saying to me "oink oink, do you really need that?"

I also highly suggest that you try and post daily in the "positive thing about me" and the "I will stay on plan because..." threads. First, it makes me feel good about something, and then its like promising myself I wont break plan one day at a time.

[wuv2bloved]

Hello and welcome, this is a fantastic site, we are all going through the same thing so we all know what each is going through. We all know it will take time to get to where we want to be but just making that FIRST step is a start. You will read how some lose fast and some lose very slow...its all pounds coming off just remember that....YOU can do this...WE ALL can do this...step by step day by day we will ALL be healthier!!

[Vortex_VVV]

Hi Melissa, I just want to echo what some others have said in their own ways, because to me it's been the most important thing I've learned over many years of trying to lose weight.

If you're really in it for the long haul, you have to accept that you might "mess up," but the one thing you absolutely must not do is give up. Make a mistake, have a bad day--start again, starting the moment you realize you messed up.

Hang in there--you can do it!

Angela

[heathermichigan]

Welcome! This is a great place for support and advice.
We've ALL been where you are right now. The best thing to do is to do SOMETHING. It may sound wayyy too simple, but start out by eating less and moving more. It will get you on track to eat healthier and move even more, and you'll be on your way!
Keep posting and people will respond! We can do this!