Hi, I'm a single mother of a 5 yr old girl and a 7 yr old girl. I work full time, and I have a wonderful career, but no husband, boyfriend or prospects. I recently moved to a new city, so I don't have any friends here either. The father of my kids and I broke up about 3 years ago, but I haven't have the courage to date anyone else. I have gained a LOT of weight since the last time I dated, so I feel very insecure. I'm hoping this year I get the courage to become more social and maybe even date a little.

I only skimmed through this thread but I have to say that so many of you feeling the exact same way I feel. This should be a regular ongoing thread! Not to wallow in our own singleness or anything but it is nice to know there are so many other people feeling the same way and find support in that.

My husband is in the process of moving out. I know it is early and I am not technically single yet but I will be. I have never lived alone but I am looking forward to it. I have no kids, just my cat. Yay for being a single 30something with a cat! LOL Anyway since I have never really lived alone or been single for any real length of time I am really looking forward to spending a good year on ME before thinking about finding someone else.

I am not exactly sure how I feel about being single yet and I really have no idea how I will feel once I am really on my own so I look forward to finding encouragement from other singletons.

I went out last night with a group and had a great time. I really should go out more often. The outing was not a meal but it was dinner time and food was available. I ordered food. the food was not very good and I only ate a few bites. I have gotten much better at not eating food just because it is there and paid for.

I'm single and loving it! And I've found that regardless of my size, the confidence plays a big part in enjoying being single and in my body. Though nothing's quite moved forward yet, I've been meeting men everywhere and it feels good to have fun without so much pressure. I'm just out to enjoy myself, but happy to have time to focus on me.

Happy I found You! Looking for some supporters
 

This is my first day on this site and as I was looking through I thought everyone is married with kids. So I was about to leave this site when I saw this post I am so happy I found you all. I am single with no children. Although I am not sure if I want children I would like to be in a relationship but right now I am so uncomfortable with my weight I'm embarrassed to date. Anyway I am looking for people to keep me motivated and on the right track. I am counting calories and using gowear fit. Is anyone else doing this?

5aday
 

Good for you! That is a great lesson to learn :)

KayNicole
 

GOOD FOR YOU!!!!! I think every women should live on their own at least once in their life. What you are doing tells me that you are a strong woman and I think you will be great. You go girl!!!! ;)

PrettyMom
 

What city do you live in now? You are going to lose that weight and you will have the have the confidence to date again!

Hopech~welcome and thanks for the encouraging words. My plan is all about focusing on positive healthy habits...

sleeping 8 hours a night
eating 5 fruits or veggies a day
eating breakfast everyday
exercising at least 5 days a week
cooking and eating whole foods rather then eating out or buying highly processed foods
being aware of and limiting portion size

For me these are all doable. I am currently focusing on 5 fruits and veggies, portion control and sleeping. My goal is not to be thin but to be healthy and strong. These healthy habits have stopped the gain and increased my energy.

5aday
 

That sounds like a great plan, it's a lifestyle not a diet. I'm done dieting it doesn't work. What I am doing is basically eating what I want but I am counting calories and making sure I burn more calories than I consume. I'm eating what I want but counting the calories just so I can make sure I burn more than I eat. With that said I try to make better choices I don't go hog wild. My biggest probelm is that I don't eat enough protein and I eat way to many carbs. So this is what I am working on now and I think I'm going to do what you're doing and make sure I have 5 fruits and veggies a day.

Thanks Hopech! I live in a suburb of Dallas where there are no single people over the age of 20. Maybe there are some, but I haven't met them yet. I am going to a dinner party tonight. The ladies in my neighborhood host a dinner party a each others homes once a month. I am trying very hard to be more social. I just hope I don't get tempted to lose my resolve and eat dessert.

Thanks Hopech! I have my moments but it's going to be a positive change overall so I will be OK. I am also looking to lose weight before I even think of dating. I want to be the old confident me. I just think if I try to find someone in a vulnerable insecure state it just wont work out well for me.

5aday- I like your plan. I am kind of in the same boat as far as trying to get the healthy habits down before working in my weight goals. Once I am in the swing of things I find myself getting competitive and pushing for those goals even harder. But since it has been a year since I was in that mode (and 10 lbs heavier) I plan on a slow and steady start.

Hopech- Focusing on the veggies helps me make better choices all day. I need to have a serving at all meals and when I have a snack I go for an apple with peanut butter or carrots with humus. it makes the empty calories less appealing when I only need one more for my goal of 5 that day.

Prettymom09- good luck at the dinner party... I read some place that socializing is good even if you there are not other single people there. You might make a new friend that has a single brother or just a new friend... enjoy

Kay- baby steps work best for me with my eating and dating lol

It's ok to a little dessert you just can't do it everyday and just have a little. Why is it hard for you to be social? I'm just curious, for me it's not that I am not social it's that I'm so unhappy with my weight I don't want to go any where. Plus I don't fit into any of my clothes and I refuse to buy new ones.

KayNicole I am in the same boat and totally agree with you, I don't even want to date until I lose some weight. We'll get there!