[Sushi Penguin]

This morning I took a peak at myself in the bathroom mirror and, once again, as has happened many times in the past few months, a thought crossed my head: I'm not as unhappy with what I see in the mirror as I am with what shows on the scale.

Does anyone understand this?

I don't.

I feel that this is partially what causes my motivation to slide - i.e. thinking/feeling "I don't look that bad/fat/awful, I don't need to work that hard on taking/keeping weight off."

The bathroom mirror is above the sink, so it's mostly my top half that can be seen. I carry a lot of weight in my thights and butt and at 117 pounds, I nearly had a flat belly. My stomach arrea doesn't seem that much bigger/fatter at 137 pounds than it did back then.
Of course, I can't fit into some of the clothes I wore then, and not too long ago I accidentally saw something like a "progress picture" - shots of myself in the same top at about 144 and 136 pounds respectively (the top was bought when I was about 120 pounds). Huge, huge, huge difference. The top looks a lot better now than it did when I was in high 140s, and I know it'll look even better when I reach 120s.

But how can I ever reach 120s (and lower), when I can't help but thing "I don't look that bad, I think I could be happy with my body if only the scale didn't show 137"? How? It just doesn't add up.

I guess it all has to do with the big WHY - why I want to shed the pounds off. And despite what a lot of people say about wanting to be healthier and etc, I'm really not concerned about that, probably since I'm not facing any health risks and on the contrary, am healthy overall.

I want to lose weight because within two years, 117 had changed into 147 and I can't live with that. I can't live with how I feel and look with the extra weight (for some reason, high 140s felt a lot worse than high 130s, even though the difference is just 10 pounds). And especially, I can't live with the number on the scale being that high, not after years of being told that I'd be fat and that I'd have huge *** like my mother, and not with the knowledge that 147 pounds for someone just over 5 feet tall is FAT.

I want to lose weight because I refuse to believe that this could be my "normal weight" (as a doctor suggested). Because I have lost before - from 59 to 52 kgs (without really trying or working on it) and then even more (while living a healthy life style and again not worrying about weight). So I think I can do it, and I believe that I don't have to stay in the 130s.

I don't want to weight 137 pounds because I remember how great I felt (and apparently looked) at 117.
I want to wear all those nice clothes which don't fit or are too uncomfortable right now.
I don't want to look small/tiny but be super heavy (oh the embarassment when a guy lifted me for a group photo shot and then talked with his friend about "sack of potatoes" and about how someone so small can possibly be so heavy - and I think I was in mid-120s at that point!)
I want to lose weight because I want to feel and look thinner.

But how on earth can I do it, when seeing myself in the mirror makes me think that I'm not as unhappy with what I see in the mirror as I am with what shows on the scale, and if only the scale showed (much) less, I could live with the way my body looks?

[Stephanie Osborne]

I understand where you are coming from. I get on days where I have no weighed myself in about a week and I catch myself in the mirror in the morning before I get dressed. I can start to see some definition in my stomach area and it is a lot flatter than it used to be. For my my problem area is this big old dimpled tush I carry around and that cannot be seen from the front. I will think I am doing great and this will lead to me slacking on my weght loss/exercise.

It is also hard being close to your goal...I mean you are right at this point there are no health risks, I also have a husband who thinks I look great...it is entirely ME trying to get back to that magic number.

To combat this I have started paying far more attention to my measurements. I had quite a while actually where my weight was stalled but my body was 'rearranging' if you will...and that is why what I saw in the mirror looked new and improved even though the scale was still daunting me.

[Treadgirl]

I am in the same boat. I have come to the conclusion that you see what you WANT to see when you look in the mirrors. I feel pretty good when I look in the mirror. So I decided to take some pictures last week. That showed me that I do need to lose more weight. I was not happy with the pictures at all!

I am always trying on old clothes to see how they fit. That is one way I stay motivated. Also, I do measurements. It is nice to see the inches fade away. Doing the monthly challenges on here is a great motivator for me, as well.

I still look in the mirror, but I try not to judge myself from that view anymore.

Good Luck.