Im not trying to be a downer (I promise) I was just talking with a buddy about my weight loss or lack there of lol And then we got on the subject of my goals and events I had coming up. I'm just curious to know if you ladies have ever let your weight stop you from doing things or going places. With myself I've let my size get in the way of everything! I was a working hairstylist/makeup artist but i've let that go. I don't go places like I use to anymore, I only go to the gym and to walmart.
Same here. Sadly, I avoid family and friends. I've wanted to go back to school for the longest time, but I won't go until I lose weight. So many things...avoiding people (that I love), places, events...seems the list is endless, but I'm turning that around and changing it this year. I have to make up for a lot of lost time.
the only thing i've really let my weight stop me from doing is wear halter tops and bikinis. if i want to go somewhere, i go. i learned a long time ago that people who are going to judge someone, are going to judge for all sorts of things. if i wasn't fat, they'd find something else to judge me for. and i've also learned that many times, people are more interested in enjoying their outing than worrying about the fat chick 2 rows up eating nachos or a hot dog at the baseball game.
i guess i've let it stop me from going to amusement parks since i don't fit in the rides, but i likely wouldn't go to those often lately anyway because they are too expensive and i'm broke, but i do miss the roller coasters...
thank you. but i'll be honest. i'm 27 years old, and only within the last few years have i actually accepted myself. it was amazing how much better life got when i let myself believe that my value as a person wasn't measured on a scale or in a size of clothing. i let go of all the negative people in my life and firmly believe that people who judge you by the size of your waist (large or small) are not worth the time to get to know or win over. when i was younger i let my weight hold me back from a lot of things (high school, college)... especially dating. i didn't think i deserved it. shortly after i accepted me as a *whole* person, not just a fat body, i started dating. and after a few losers i found the man i'm going to be marrying in a few weeks.
it's not easy to get there, and i'll probably have to make the same shift in thinking when i get down to where i want to be weight-wise, but it makes things a LOT easier.
Last edited by konfyoozed; 05-02-2011 at 01:53 AM.
Unfortunately, I let my weight hold me back from almost everything. I avoid going out with friends (mostly because I don't want to hear my male friends comment on the "hot" chicks we see, I don't always want to see how beautiful my female friends are looking, and I don't like the "invisible" feeling at bars/clubs), I avoid wearing the clothes I really like in favor of those which are more slimming, and I avoid taking vacations. For example, I'd really love to finally take an Alaskan cruise this summer, or take my mother to someplace tropical, but I find myself putting it off because I don't want to look back at "fat vacation photos," and I don't want my weight making me feel like crap while I'm there. It's ridiculous, and selfish, I know. My mother misses out on a nice family vacation just because I don't like how I look, and my friends think I don't want to see them, or that I've gone loony and become a hermit.
The last time I got down to about 175, I felt MUCH more confident in public. I can't wait to get back there.
my weight stopped me from doing a lot of things, didnt finish uni on time, never wore the things i rly liked, but what i regret the most is that i avoid meeting new ppl, i have put up an invisible shield around me and dont let anyone get to know me better .
Mandy- Yes you do have the right attitude! I haven't been able to get there yet.
Now im to the point that I don't really have any friends to go out with so I dont even bother. I'm sooo paranoid when im in public! I swear that everyone is looking at me. My mother thinks im crazy lol Even when im driving I think all eyes are on me lol Now Im very vain so its a mix of vanity and my weight gain lol I don't even have clothes other than a few pairs of sweats and t shirts so i dont have many options gym and walmart lol
Last edited by imtryingtotry; 05-02-2011 at 03:39 AM.
imtryingtotry - It's fascinating to see how different perspectives on the same issue can be. Sometimes I wish I always felt like people were looking at me - the vast majority of the time, I feel completely overlooked by strangers.
It's stopped me from joining group activities with friends because I'm worried that I'll be the fat one who'll get out of breath really easily.
It's stopped me from ever wearing dresses, I feel like a tent with a head in them!
It's stopped me from feeling comfortable wearing bikinis, I do wear them and I do sunbathe/go swimming, but maaan do I feel awkward.
It's stopped me from being able to dance properly when my friends and I go out. I worry that I just look like a wobbly hippo!
It's stopped me from buying the types of clothes that I want, therefore it's stopped me from enjoying shopping - it's my nightmare!
I still go to places with friends/family, but I guess it's just the process of getting ready to go out that's the worst part. I feel like I don't suit anything, and make about 4 different changes of clothes before giving up and wearing jeans and some sort of top.
I never skip an event because I feel too fat, because most of the time when I'm out I forget about myself and just enjoy the company of others. But while I'm there I do feel out of place, like I'm the biggest one in the group, and it does get to me once I leave but I try not to think about it while I'm there because I want to be happy not miserable!
There's a lot of generic things my weight has certainly stopped me from doing, but the one that's a little more unique and personal to me is in relation to seeing Broadway shows. I absolutely adore musicals and would love to go regularly (I'm only about an hour from NYC) but one thing I'm always super self-conscious of is how small the seats are in some of those theaters. I always feel pretty squished, and always feel bad for whoever's stuck sitting next to me at those things. One time, someone even moved to a seat with a worse view so they wouldn't be squished beside me for the entire show...
So since seeing these shows is one of my favorite things to do, I'd rather enjoy it without the day being clouded by my fitting into the stupid seats.
ILRPinkGirl- I know what you mean about those little seats! I just buy an aisle seat so that gives me a little extra space to lean to the other side and spare the person next to me. It makes a difference.
The easy answer for me is that my weight hasn't held me back from anything. If I go a little deeper, though, I've definitely had some physical self-esteem issues because of my weight, and I'm sure that's affected my ability to meet men and find love. Sad but true. Otherwise, I have great confidence in myself and my abilities and view my weight as just what it is-- my weight not my self-worth.
**its stopped me feeling i can achieve all i can within my studied profession. I study theatre and performance and slowly over 3 years every girl over a size uk 12 has lost weight and become at least a 10, there are maybe 3 of us left now :s.... i think although i have studied alot of feminist theory, its very true that looks do count especially in certain businesses. (this makes me so very sad at times)
** its stopped me wanting to go swimming and wear any form of flesh on show clothes, i dont mind the old leggings and skirt/dress but if i show skin i feel so nervous i feel sick.
**its stopped me being sociable the last 4 months because i have een trying to develop self control. tonight is my first night out for a while so im really hoping i keep my cool and dont go crazy when im a bit drunk
to sum it up...EVERYTHING. i am so embarrassed of how i look i try to take myself out of anything fun, avoid friends/family like they have the plague, and it has even affected my intimate life with my husband. it is so disheartening to feel like i am not worthy of being happy...but i havent yet figured out how to change that thinking. i just want to be happy/proud of myself. if we just take it one day at a time we'll get to where we want to be-but we have to stick with it!!
What Has Your Weight Held You Back From?
Sad but true. Otherwise, I have great confidence in myself and my abilities and view my weight as just what it is-- my weight not my self-worth.
